When someone does not understand about your anxiety?

[phil06]

Basically my anxiety has been quite bad again over the months and I still stay with my parents. However my mum doesn't understand it despite me suffering over 5 years. She still has the old fashioned "mental illness" stigma attatched to the old days.

There's been times in the car she says "Why are you checking your heart?" and starts making a fuss...today she said I was mentally ill and needed something to calm me down..she keeps telling me I'm not normal and I need to go out and I tell her I try and go out and she realises that when I say but it's hard to do it alot..

I tried to explain it, show her books, shes been to all my doctor appointments over the years. She tells me counsellors are crap and she could tell me it all. She keeps saying how do you treat anxiety but she knows it all.

To this day she treats me alien like I'm the only one suffering..maybe it's a strain on others but I'm fed up of her ignorance you would think by now she could realise I can't help it at times? :shrug:

[blueangel]

I suspect there are a few things going on here.

It's very true, people to have pre-conceived ideas about all sorts of mental illness, whether it's anxiety, depression or whatever. It may be that she is of this mindset, and it may be that her own family background was of the type where you just have to "pull yourself together and get on with it". People don't necessarily change their minds very quickly about this type of thought, as they are hard-wired.

It also could be that she is worried and upset about how you are - don't forget, she is your mum. However, she might not want to show you that she is worried, as she probably feels that it wouldn't be helpful to you in your current frame of mind.

Also, she could well be very frustrated, as she feels that your problem is anxiety and that she can't get this through to you - which will make her feelin that she is failing as your parent as she can't help you.