KelHumphreys
10-02-11, 11:34
Hi all,
I'm new to this site and just wondered if any of the symptoms and feelings I'm having at the moment resonante with any of you. I've visited the site before and always found everyone to be really helpful so any support or reassurance you can give would be gratefully recieved!
I've always been a bit of a worrier, but never to this extent before, and certainly not about my health. I got married in 2009, and in February last year (2010) I came off the pill as we decided we would start trying for a family. It's since I came off the pill that my anxiety about my health has really started.
I was fine until about June time when I had a water infection, which seemed to take a long time to clear. After that it just seemed my anxiety grew, and I got another water infection in early October that wouldn't seem to shift. I then had constant stomach ache and back ache which, along with the anxiety just got worse and worse, having an upset stomach all the time. The doctor (after 4 visits as I didn't believe them each time I went) diagnosed IBS brought on by stress, as back in October I was under quite a bit of stress, with my job (as a production/ops manager for an events and communications agency), organising my Mum's 50th birthday party, organising a charity ball for St Annes Hospice and selling our house. We had just agreed an offer and were starting the ball rolling on moving finally after a year of being on the market.
After a couple of doctors visits as I became obessed with finding blood in my stools and urine (sorry if TMI!) she agreed to do a full set of blood tests, all which came back clear. I went armed with a list of questions, as my main concerns were bowel, kidney, liver or ovarian cancer. After this visit I did feel a bit better, and the back ache I had which I had believed to be IBS I think was acutally just anxiety - basically like carrying something heavy round with me.
Since October my IBS has been on and off, but for the past few weeks I've gone downhill again and my anxiety is back to an all time high. This time, it's not only my usual stomach anxiety, but I've developed since last Monday a feeling of something stuck in my throat all the time. I can swallow and eat, it's just a feeling of something stuck there. I went to the doctors and she said it was just anxiety and not to worry about it. I have an appoitment with her on Tuesday next week anyway so I can discuss it further, but having read the forums on here it seems like something many people have.
Since Tuesday this week I have also developed a funny metallic taste in my mouth which I'm wondering is also connected to the lump on the throat sensation. My other symptoms include my normal IBS stomach ache (which is mostly on the left hand side, fuelling my fear of ovarian cancer), aches in my hips, strange sensation, not pain as such, more an awareness if that makes sense, of my right breast and a tightness in the throat and chest area.
I've had a full set of blood tests and am not feeling ill other than the above symptoms. As I never had any of these symtoms or any of the anxiety feelings prior to coming off the pill I can't help but think that its possibly all hormone related and will eventually settle down. I only had my periods for 3 years prior to going on the pill, which I then took for 8 years before coming off, so it stands to reason it would take a while to fully get out of my system.
When I can think rationally, I know that most of my symptoms are probablly just anxiety and that by spending your life worrying about everything you aren't living it. I also know that I am so lucky and fortunate in everything I have - I have a wonderful family, especially my parents and grandparents who I am very close to, a fantastic husband - we have just yesterday celebrated 11 years together, with our 2nd wedding anniversary coming up in June, we are in the process of hopefully moving house to our 'long term family house', we both have good jobs and a fantastic group of friends who we spend a lot of time with. I try to tell myself this but sometimes it makes it worse as then when I am being negative it reminds me how much I have to loose!
I have become a constant checker, constantly checking my body, asking my husband and Mum if this is normal, do I need to worry about this etc. I am acutely aware of every change in my body, and cannot just have a stomach ache, I then have to obsess over what might be causing it. When I have numerous symptoms, for example at the moment the lump in throat, then the taste in the mouth, then stomach ache, I worry that something is spreading which is causing numerous problems. I worry about doctors mis-diagnosing things, and I know so many people who have experienced cancer I just think every little thing could be it. I worry that not being this obsessive about my health might lead me to miss something.
What is very odd is that still the thought of my family or friends experiencing a health problem is still worse than if it happened to me, but this near obsession is starting to take over my life. I used to be a really happy, healthy person and now I don't feel completley well a lot of the time. The episode back in June was the first time I've ever been to open surgery at my doctors and only the second appointment I've ever had with the doctor. Prior to that I'd only been to have my blood pressure checked when on the pill and for my bad skin, which had totally cleared but is now bad again due to all the anxiety!
We are now agreeing the sale of our house again (as the last sale in October fell through) and it seems odd everything has resurfaced again at this time if it wasn't just anxiety. The feelings though seem so real to me, especially this lump in my throat. I wish I could handle it better and stop thinking about it all the time as I know its a self fullfilling propecy. I've bought a book on CBT and have tried some of the exercises but I just think what if I'm missing a real health problem because I think its just anxiety... I know how ridiculous it sounds!
So finally, I'm at the docs on Tuesday for a followup appointment as I've just changed tablets for my IBS to Mebeverine, which my Mum takes as she also has IBS. I'm not a fan of medication on the whole so only take it when my stomach is bad and it seems to be working fine. As I have private healthcare, I'm wondering if I ask to be refered for a stomach scan and throat scan, get myself totally checked out and then hopefully I can relax in the knowledge that there is nothing there. I wouldn't want the NHS to pay for this just to make me feel better but as I pay for healthcare I might as well use it. Has anyone else done this and did it finally aleviate their fears, or will I just find something else to worry about? The reason I think it might work is I had to go for a heart scan last year as my Mum found out she has a bicuspid valve and enlarged aorta so all the family also had to be checked. I now never worry about my heart as the scan came back totally clear.
Phew. I actually feel a bit better getting all out.
Any advice or thoughts would be gratefully recieved.
Thanks so much for listening!
Love Kelly
xx
I'm new to this site and just wondered if any of the symptoms and feelings I'm having at the moment resonante with any of you. I've visited the site before and always found everyone to be really helpful so any support or reassurance you can give would be gratefully recieved!
I've always been a bit of a worrier, but never to this extent before, and certainly not about my health. I got married in 2009, and in February last year (2010) I came off the pill as we decided we would start trying for a family. It's since I came off the pill that my anxiety about my health has really started.
I was fine until about June time when I had a water infection, which seemed to take a long time to clear. After that it just seemed my anxiety grew, and I got another water infection in early October that wouldn't seem to shift. I then had constant stomach ache and back ache which, along with the anxiety just got worse and worse, having an upset stomach all the time. The doctor (after 4 visits as I didn't believe them each time I went) diagnosed IBS brought on by stress, as back in October I was under quite a bit of stress, with my job (as a production/ops manager for an events and communications agency), organising my Mum's 50th birthday party, organising a charity ball for St Annes Hospice and selling our house. We had just agreed an offer and were starting the ball rolling on moving finally after a year of being on the market.
After a couple of doctors visits as I became obessed with finding blood in my stools and urine (sorry if TMI!) she agreed to do a full set of blood tests, all which came back clear. I went armed with a list of questions, as my main concerns were bowel, kidney, liver or ovarian cancer. After this visit I did feel a bit better, and the back ache I had which I had believed to be IBS I think was acutally just anxiety - basically like carrying something heavy round with me.
Since October my IBS has been on and off, but for the past few weeks I've gone downhill again and my anxiety is back to an all time high. This time, it's not only my usual stomach anxiety, but I've developed since last Monday a feeling of something stuck in my throat all the time. I can swallow and eat, it's just a feeling of something stuck there. I went to the doctors and she said it was just anxiety and not to worry about it. I have an appoitment with her on Tuesday next week anyway so I can discuss it further, but having read the forums on here it seems like something many people have.
Since Tuesday this week I have also developed a funny metallic taste in my mouth which I'm wondering is also connected to the lump on the throat sensation. My other symptoms include my normal IBS stomach ache (which is mostly on the left hand side, fuelling my fear of ovarian cancer), aches in my hips, strange sensation, not pain as such, more an awareness if that makes sense, of my right breast and a tightness in the throat and chest area.
I've had a full set of blood tests and am not feeling ill other than the above symptoms. As I never had any of these symtoms or any of the anxiety feelings prior to coming off the pill I can't help but think that its possibly all hormone related and will eventually settle down. I only had my periods for 3 years prior to going on the pill, which I then took for 8 years before coming off, so it stands to reason it would take a while to fully get out of my system.
When I can think rationally, I know that most of my symptoms are probablly just anxiety and that by spending your life worrying about everything you aren't living it. I also know that I am so lucky and fortunate in everything I have - I have a wonderful family, especially my parents and grandparents who I am very close to, a fantastic husband - we have just yesterday celebrated 11 years together, with our 2nd wedding anniversary coming up in June, we are in the process of hopefully moving house to our 'long term family house', we both have good jobs and a fantastic group of friends who we spend a lot of time with. I try to tell myself this but sometimes it makes it worse as then when I am being negative it reminds me how much I have to loose!
I have become a constant checker, constantly checking my body, asking my husband and Mum if this is normal, do I need to worry about this etc. I am acutely aware of every change in my body, and cannot just have a stomach ache, I then have to obsess over what might be causing it. When I have numerous symptoms, for example at the moment the lump in throat, then the taste in the mouth, then stomach ache, I worry that something is spreading which is causing numerous problems. I worry about doctors mis-diagnosing things, and I know so many people who have experienced cancer I just think every little thing could be it. I worry that not being this obsessive about my health might lead me to miss something.
What is very odd is that still the thought of my family or friends experiencing a health problem is still worse than if it happened to me, but this near obsession is starting to take over my life. I used to be a really happy, healthy person and now I don't feel completley well a lot of the time. The episode back in June was the first time I've ever been to open surgery at my doctors and only the second appointment I've ever had with the doctor. Prior to that I'd only been to have my blood pressure checked when on the pill and for my bad skin, which had totally cleared but is now bad again due to all the anxiety!
We are now agreeing the sale of our house again (as the last sale in October fell through) and it seems odd everything has resurfaced again at this time if it wasn't just anxiety. The feelings though seem so real to me, especially this lump in my throat. I wish I could handle it better and stop thinking about it all the time as I know its a self fullfilling propecy. I've bought a book on CBT and have tried some of the exercises but I just think what if I'm missing a real health problem because I think its just anxiety... I know how ridiculous it sounds!
So finally, I'm at the docs on Tuesday for a followup appointment as I've just changed tablets for my IBS to Mebeverine, which my Mum takes as she also has IBS. I'm not a fan of medication on the whole so only take it when my stomach is bad and it seems to be working fine. As I have private healthcare, I'm wondering if I ask to be refered for a stomach scan and throat scan, get myself totally checked out and then hopefully I can relax in the knowledge that there is nothing there. I wouldn't want the NHS to pay for this just to make me feel better but as I pay for healthcare I might as well use it. Has anyone else done this and did it finally aleviate their fears, or will I just find something else to worry about? The reason I think it might work is I had to go for a heart scan last year as my Mum found out she has a bicuspid valve and enlarged aorta so all the family also had to be checked. I now never worry about my heart as the scan came back totally clear.
Phew. I actually feel a bit better getting all out.
Any advice or thoughts would be gratefully recieved.
Thanks so much for listening!
Love Kelly
xx