The Big shock that is Anxiety

[Bravedart]

Hi all, I found this website having looked online after two months of hell. I wanted to introduce myself as new and wondered if any of you have experienced what I have since mid December. I'll try and be as brief as possible. From September 2010 I had a number of occasions where I felt really weird. Full of panic, feeling dizzy, having to leave work, shops and bars etc. I ignored this and put it down to being tired. I'm 33 and have never had anything like this before. Then came the Tipping point, In mid December I felt a similar sensation described above, I left work, jumped in the car and had to pull over on the Motorway. I dialled 999 as I thought I was going to pass out, everything seemed weird and I felt totally detached from myself and my surroundings. The Paramedic directed me to my doctor who has done some tests which were clear and has diagnosed me with Anxiety. I'm on Propranolol, Citalopram and Diazepam (As and when required however was on 20mg a day for the first month) which are just about keeping the edge off my symptoms however they are with me every minute of every day. Here's what I have experienced and continue to do so. Feeling detached from self and surroundings (Feels like I'm not me and I'm looking down at myself as if I'm a shell) Shaky legs, feeling that I can't walk or will collapse. Tremor and twitching in legs, arms and neck, Intrusive thoughts about those close to me which is horrible. Being on edge all the time, feeling I cant think, poor memory, weight loss, Irrational fears of doing anything, Burning sensations in arms and legs. I hope this is posted in the correct location but would really appreciate some responses if you've had or are experiencing any of the above. Thanks.

[nomorepanic]

Hi Bravedart

A huge warm welcome to nmp.

You'll get loads of advice and support here and make some lovely friends along the way.

Best wishes

[snowgoose]

hello Bravedart :)
you have come to the right place for sure............all of us know exactly what you have and are experiencing . So you are not alone ever ...........and there is lnformation here to help us get better .
I say read ,read and read some more ..............the more we understand how our bodies react to panic and anxiety the more we can challenge negative thinking and put more rational thoughts in place . perhaps ask your doctor for Cognitive Behaviour Therapy ......so many here have been helped by it x

I am back with anxiety problems because I took my eye off the ball after 10 years free . And I remember to the minute my first attack ..totally out the blue or so I thought at the time . The fear is horrendous .
But I have been fine with meds and my own self help for along time you will recover honest . You just need in my opinion some time off work to get yourself stabilised on your meds ................make yourself go out and have a walk each day .....dont avoid driving ...........cut back on any alcohol or caffeine .............and above all be very gentle with yourself for now .
You matter !!
this didnt just arrive overnight .............something has been niggling your psyche for a long time .......could be brain chemicals or past ....stress .whatever .

take time out to recover ................post here ......help others when feeling better ............and you will with the help of meds ,cbt or other will get your life back . just a bit more aware of your sensitivity to the anxious illness .

keep going and welcome from me too
:hugs:

[Bravedart]

Thanks Snowgoose I appreciate that. Andrew.

[buster_uk1967]

Welcome Andrew.

[Bravedart]

Thanks Buster.

[snowgoose]

hello :)
how are you today ? with the meds you are on .there is a lot of people sharing stories here and supporting each other , sounds I hope that you have a good gp.
this is such a misunderstood and debilitating illness ........and it doesnt matter what ,age ,sex colour or any ISM you want .....it gets its claws in and makes us feel wretched .
All the symptoms you have described are anxiety .............derealisation is the nastiest for me ...........and the dizziness .

but again I know because I did it before .I will get well again ...........and you will too .
takes a bit of graft but we already know how to struggle a bit .
Been doing it a long time before the panic attack that floored us .

so many wise ones on this forum and I hope they reply to you soon .

a day at a time for now
x

[chatterbox]

hi bravedart
Yes all the symptoms i feel, so please dont worry. as stress will make you feel worse. It will help you being on this sight has it as done for me take care Holly

[Bravedart]

Thanks Holly, means a lot that I'm not alone. Andrew

[Patsta]

Hey Andrew,
I too at the age off 33 started suffering from anxiety, and like you, I tipped over the edge whilst driving. I still remeber the driving with my 2 young boys in the car after a fun day out, and all of a sudden this fear just hit me, and I kept thinking to myself 'Stop the car, get out' but I couldn't as I didn't want to scare the kids. I continued to drive home, which thankfully wasn't to far away and put my feet up and calmed myself down! Afew days later, it happened again, and I was not able to drive myself home, I had to call a friend to come and get me! This was 9 years ago. I experienced everything you described in your post. Its not a nice feeling, and something that alot of people don't understand if they haven't experienced it themselves.
Having said all that, I have been on and off meds for 9 years now. When I come off my meds, its because I keep forgetting to take them, so i actually end up weaning myself off, but manage to stay anxiety free for a while...(the longest has been 2 years or there abouts). I have learned to recognise the signs now, and I know allowing myself to get run down, both physically and mentally will usually bring my anxiety back, so then I quickly go back on my meds.
How long have you been on your meds now and are they working for you?
I am on Zoloft (sertraline) and have always taken it for my anxiety. I find it fantastic, apart fromt he initial side effects, but they don't last long! My doctor has also prescribed me some Xanax to help with the early stages until my meds kick in, and i find that a great help as it calms me within 15 minutes or so.
Good luck Andrew, just remember that you are not alone in feeling what you are feeling...there are many of us out here that feel exactly the same way, and many of us that get through it and lead normal, happy lives! You will too!
Cheers
Patty

[Veronica H]

:welcome:to NMP Andrew. Many of us here could have written your introduction word for word, and I hope in some way that this will be a comfort as you recover. Thoughts become feelings very quickly with this illness as our nerves are so sensitised. It is fear which keeps this cycle going. There is a brilliant book by Dr Claire Weekes;SELF HELP FOR YOUR NERVES published by Thorsens ISBN 0-7225-3155-9.This is available from the NMP shop. Dr Weekes was a physician and scientist. She was a fellow sufferer (nominated for the nobel prize for medicine) and really understood this illness. She took the mystery out of it, and devised a simple programme for recovery. I can't recommend this enough.( It is a bit old fashioned, but still so relevant).
Here is a link to her site;
http://www.claireweekes.com.au/


This will get better. Veronicax

[Bravedart]

I'm ok thanks. The meds seem to be just taking the edge off things. I've been on CT since 24th December so they must be having some impact? :D The Depersonalisation is the worst part for me having seemingly got over all the initial horrible intrusive thoughts which I'm told is very common? Thanks for asking and speak soon. Andrew

[Bravedart]

Thanks very much for this Veronica will have a look. Andrew :flowers:

[Bravedart]

Hi Patty

Thanks for taking the time to reply to my post. I've been on Citalopram since Dec 24th. I think its having some impact as I do not feel as bad as i did when this hit me. (And hope I never do). I'm also on propranolol and Diazepam as and when required. I've started to put myself in situations where my mind and body are yelling at me saying do not!! However I've been off work since and have researched whats happening to me and have decided I need to challenge my thoughts, physichal symptoms each day which is difficult but I know I must do it. I have two young kids and will not let this take their dad away from them. I'm glad you appear to have found what works for you. Take care Andrew. :)

[Headdown]

Hey!

Sounds exactly like my symptoms too.

I think this part "Feeling detached from self and surroundings (Feels like I'm not me and I'm looking down at myself as if I'm a shell)" doesn't really get a much chat about it than the other symptoms, probably because it's so hard to describe. I remember the first proper panic attack I had, it was like I was playing a video game in 3rd person mode. Very strange. If only we could bottle up that feeling, could probably make a fortune selling it!.

Just wanted to say hello and confirm that those symptoms sound (unfortunately) very common

[Bravedart]

Thanks Headown, glad to hear I'm not the only one......:yesyes:

[Patsta]

Hi Andrew,
Glad your meds seem to be working for you.
About 3 years ago, I started suffering with my anxiety again, after 2 or so years of being anxiety free. At the time I was working in my own business (beauty therapist) and very long hours, which at that time I became physically and mentally exhausted.
My anxiety hit me with full force, and for 2 weeks, I couldn't even get out of the house let alone work. (Isn't it funny how this condition cripples us to the point where anything that we could do before, just scares the living daylights out us now!)
Anyway, after 2 weeks, I challenged myself, and went back to work. It was the best thing I could have done! It took my mind off my anxiety, I was interacting with other people, and I realised that, what i was so scared off, was something that i had been doing for so long without any problems.
This time round, i have not avoided any situations. I have just gone about doing what I normally would, ( although I'm not working at the moment) taking kids to school, doctors appointments, shopping, driving etc...I'm determined thats its not going to confine me to the house, although I would prefer that at the moment...I just won't let it.
Maybe, you should try easing yourself back into work, a small step at a time and see how that goes for you. It may help you, just to get some normality back in your life.
Cheers
Patty

[Bravedart]

Hi Patty

I think your right, I plan to do this over the next week or so I think. As you say its something I've done for the last 18 years so why can't I do it? It's very weird how this affects us. I think I'm also still trying to get to grips with whats happened to me over the last couple of months as its been my first experience of high anxiety. I actually thought i had lost my mind. I feel emotionally and physically exausted. Its all so strange, thanks for your words and I'm glad your doing ok. Take Care. Andrew.