getting better scares me? is this normal.. so upset

[misskitty]

This may sound strange but please bear woth me. I have suffered for years with anxiety/panic attacks/ocd etc.. then i moved to be with my boyfriend for a month over new year and became sort of like a new person.. yes i still had many anxious thoughts but felt strangely calm at the start. Eventually I started noticing how well i was doing and it totally freaked me out and brought on the panic attacks again. It ws like I would catch myself being ok and then think 'ah see now your bound to panic in a minute' or 'what if you suddenly forget where you are'..just intrusive thoughts.

Anyway eventually i got bought back home after the worst panic of my life and now it got me thinking.. am i scared of gettingbetter. Like when i achieve something and forget my problems I seem to be really aware of myself and what i'm doing and that makes me panic.

[scaredstiff695]

hi
i asked this at cbt what it would be like to start with better would i actually no if i was betterdta
and i was told that i will get taught later on but basically its about trying not to look or think about what you was like only think for the now with anxiety. cos as soon as you will start having the thoughts you did. it doesn't mean you are scared of getting better at all
keep thinking positive x x

[hypochondriac]

Yup, I think its because you get so used feeling that way that you kind of forget what what better is like and you fear it
its all fine
x

[GunMetal]

I understand this. If theres a day i go out and get no anxiety. i'm immediatly aware that i feel fine and think it must be a "symptom" and then in turn, set off a panic attack!

[Neo]

I understand where you're coming from MissKitty. I think what you may be scared of is not necessarily getting better, but perhaps that it won't last.

When you feel this great way again, just try taking every moment/hour/day/week as it comes and don't over analyse it too much. See what happens. Remember - at least you got better!!!