View Full Version : Mini-success
Anyone who reads my posts will know that I have social phobia and am struggling with an eating disorder. I have also been having a particularly difficult time for the past couple of weeks.
This weekend I have been on a hypnosis training workshop which is run by my therapist Jill, and her business partner. Yesterday was a difficult day and this morning I was very upset and the last thing I felt like was being with people.
However, after some dramas and upsets this morning, with some support I managed to turn the day around. Yesterday Jill asked me if I wanted to accompany her and the rest of the group to the pub for lunch but I couldn't face going.
But today I realised one of the reason I had wanted to attend this weekend was so that I wasn't alone and had some company. So when she asked me if I wanted to join them this lunch time I agreed (after a little hesitation). She said I could just have a drink and there was no pressure on me.
The way I've been feeling out of control with food being with people eating lunch was really the last thing I wanted to do. In fact, originally I had planned not to eat all day. When we got to the pub Jill asked me if I just wanted a drink and or if I could manage something to eat. She doesn't pressure me. I felt extremely anxious and really wanted to avoid eating but know swinging from restricting to bingeing doesn't help. So I said I'd try a sandwich. She said she would order for me and would ask for the sandwich without butter, so I had a ham salad sandwich.
I sat with Jill and Mark, but we were on a big table with others from the group. Most people were eating more substantial meals and it was incredibly difficult to eat, and to watch others eating. I managed three quarters of the sandwich and I chatted to Jill and Mark.
Sorry this is such a long post and I am not sure it is much of a success but then considering the fact I was so distressed I was in tears this morning and that being with a lot of people as well as eating is so difficult for me, I guess this is a minor success.
Jill said I am doing brilliantly and the progress I've made in the past couple of months has been down to work I've done on myself and that the clinic I'm attending really haven't done anything. She also said I wouldn't have gone to the pub and definitely wouldn't have eaten anything a year ago and she thinks I am doing great.
I find it hard to acknowledge any progress I am making because I tend to dismiss everything I do as not being good enough. In fact, I feel embarrassed posting this as a success [:I]. It helps so much when other people who've been with me through all stages of this illness tell me how well I'm doing and that it is my hard work that is paying off.
Karen
Happiness is not a state to arrive at but a manner of travelling.
You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough ~ Christine Cagney, Cagney & Lacey
Hi Karen, of course you should post it as a success, you did marvelous, well done.
Still read your posts and think about you often.xxxx
Hi Karen,
I'm a regular reader of your threads and, although I do not regularly reply as these subjects are outside my experience, I find it fascinating and inspiring that you carry on challenging yourself in these different ways.
You have been on such a journey yourself and yet you are so helpful to others on here that I am quite in awe of you actually!
Good for you on your latest success!
Eeb x
A MINI success?!! Blimey.. I nearly fell off my chair when I read what you had done!
You did amazingly well today and I am SOO pleased you posted it here, exactly where it belongs.
It is great that Jill was able to reassure you how well you are doing, I know it means a lot to you. She is so right and even though it has been a struggle lately never forget how far you have come.
Really well done Karen, you did amazingly well today after a shaky start.
:D:D:D:D:D
Tammy x
Karen, what can I say?
When I saw the title "mini success" I knew you were telling porkies LOL. This is a big success! Especially in view of how you were earlier in the day and the environment you were in.
I'm not going to say how much the clinic has done for you, but the fact that they have reached out to you has given you that impetus to make big strides, especially with your social phobia and control. I have noticed before that you progress when others are around you, whether it be Jill, Jack or other people at the clinic.
Not to mention your possy here on NMP!
But at the end of the day it is YOU that has done the grafting to get where you are now, which is loads better than at Christmas for example.
Now celebrate this success. Go round the shops tomorrow and treat yourself!
Ray
http://www.anxietyrelease.org.uk/
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.
~Mark Sanders and Tia Sillers
Thank you for the replies. It does mean such a lot to me.
Alexis: Thank you for replying. I know you have your own trouble at the moment and I read your thread and am thinking of you even though I don't always reply. It is so kind of you to post to me.
Eeb: I appreciate your reply, thank you. I value all the support I get here and I know most of my issues are out of the realm of anxiety and panic. Still people take time to write and encourage me.
Your comments are very kind. I try to give back in some way some of the help I've received here and there are many many supportive members on this site.
Tammy: Thanks mate.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">A MINI success?!! Blimey.. I nearly fell off my chair when I read what you had done!</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
LOL :D. I hope you didn't hurt yourself! Just like when I stumbled out of bed the other day - still suffering for that [:I].
I think I needed a bit of a shove in the right direction today and Jill gave me that! She was my therapist for well over a year and still helps unofficially. It does mean a lot when she tells me that I am the one who has been working hard to get myself well when at one time she (along with a fair few others I think) doubted I would even survive. Now she believes I am doing more to help myself and my progress is in spite of struggles I've had at the clinic.
Karen
Happiness is not a state to arrive at but a manner of travelling.
You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough ~ Christine Cagney, Cagney & Lacey
Hi Ray
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">When I saw the title "mini success" I knew you were telling porkies LOL. This is a big success! Especially in view of how you were earlier in the day and the environment you were in.</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
LOL :D. I think it will take some time yet for me to view anything I do as a success at all, let alone more than a small achievement which came about after being given a gentle push by someone else! But I am trying to change.
I would say going to the clinic has help by the fact that I am in contact with other people, which helps my social phobia. But there have also been detrimental effects which have been particularly evident in the past couple of weeks. I am feeling more cut off again now I am separated from friendships I had started to build with other patients, and the lack of direction and consistency has impacted on my eating problems.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">Go round the shops tomorrow and treat yourself!</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
I wish [^]!! I have to take my car for a service tomorrow, pick up a loan car, go to the clinic, and then go back to pick up my car at the end of the day.
Plus I think the service, plus a new tyre and brake pads will cost enough as it is [:O].
Karen
Happiness is not a state to arrive at but a manner of travelling.
You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough ~ Christine Cagney, Cagney & Lacey
Hi Karen,
Well done, you did so well. This is a major success. So proud of you sis.
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Right get ready you are going to have a fling around the globe hug (this is done by me grabbing you by the wrist and swinging you round my head like a shot putter in the style of Miss Trunchball from Matilda - although obviously I don't ever put my hair in a bun, I do have standards - and then weeeeeeeeeh off you go)!!!!
You have had a fab day today and achieved so so so so so so so so so so so much!!!!!
Proud - I should cocoa!!!!!
Love Piglet xxxxx
Thank you Lisa.
Piglet: Well what can I say to that?!? [8D]
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">Right get ready you are going to have a fling around the globe hug (this is done by me grabbing you by the wrist and swinging you round my head like a shot putter in the style of Miss Trunchball from Matilda - although obviously I don't ever put my hair in a bun, I do have standards - and then weeeeeeeeeh off you go)!!!!
<div align="right">Originally posted by Piglet - 02 April 2006 : 22:46:36</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
I think you might have a bit of trouble lifting me to do that [:I]. Made me laugh though!
Karen xx
:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
Well everyone has said what I think but I think it is also a HUGE success that you have posted on the succss board!!!!!
You really have come so far since xmas it's almost unbelievable and, despite repeating myself, you are a HUGE FABULOUS INSPIRITATION!
Lol Karen - I will post on here too one day!
Fantastic [8D][8D][8D][8D][8D]
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
bluesparkle
03-04-06, 08:48
hi karen...
well done you... that was a great post to read... i know how hard it can be you should be so proud of yourself...
i dont get on here much at the moment but i do pop on and i am still reading your posts... am quite often thinking of you and sending you posative vibes...
yes this should definately be in the success stories
take care
rach
x
Hi Karen
Well done you !!
Trying so hard to face something that makes you feel scared, rotten, panicky , etc etc.... is a very big effort and shows some courage !
Way to go girl !! [Yeah!]
Florence.
*** Worry gives a small thing a big shadow.***
Thank you so so much for all the messages of encouragement. I still feel a little embarrassed about posting here with something that I think should be so easy.
Nigel: Glad I made you smile. Not sure about the turning point unfortunately, as I am struggling just as much as usual this morning.
Fee: Thanks so much Aunty! It is difficult to believe I am an inspiration to anyone really [:I]. I feel the same way about you and the way you are coping with everything.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">Lol Karen - I will post on here too one day!
<div align="right">Originally posted by feege - 03 April 2006 : 06:09:49</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
YES you WILL :D!! In fact, there have been a number of occasions already when I think you could have posted here.
Rach: Thanks and I appreciate the positive vibes.
Florence: Thanks for your support.
Karen xx
Karen,
Way to go you, what a brilliant post to read, be proud of what you achieved, because we are all very proud of what you did mate.
Love
Trac xxx
'Live your life with arms wide open, today is where your book begins, the rest is still unwritten'
Hi Karen
Excellent stuff re your news very well done to you.
Im so pleased for you
(((HUGS)))
Take Care
Alex
Alex
Many People Will Walk
In & Out Of Your Life
But Only True Friends
Will Leave Footprints
In Your Heart
W.I.F.T.S.
03-04-06, 11:48
Well done karen,
It's funny, I've read other posts of yours and you seem so on top of things and together and one doesn't realise the difficulties that you face.
I guess that's a psychological thing. I've had difficult things to deal with, like when my fiancee has Post-traumatic stress disorder and panic attacks left her unable to speak for 3 days! I've spoken to the therapist i was seeing at the time about it and she says that REAL emergencies distract you from what you're going through yourself .
Isn't it wierd how it's easier to deal with other people's problems rather than your own?
Anyway, well done for going to the pub (my fiancee has had eating disorders too). When there is something like that which I don't want to do I can hear myself saying 'No, i don't want to do that!', but i try and challenge it and say 'YES, I do want to do this. I know it will be hard, but it will also be very valuable and help me to recover'.
It is very hard, but you've taken a huge step. Well done!!
Ships in harbour are safe..but that's not what ships were built for.
Hi Karen,
I've just read your post and wanted to say that I agree with everyones replies, I think you did brilliant. :D
Take Care,
Heather
Hi Karen,
Mini success, I don't think so!!!!!! I was so happy to read your post. You are a good girl!!!!!!! xxxxxxxjean
Thank you Jean, Heather, Trac, Alex and wishidfoundthissooner. I appreciate your support so much. It is still difficult for me to recognise any of these steps as progress, particularly when the very next day I can feel like I've taken three steps back again.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">It's funny, I've read other posts of yours and you seem so on top of things and together and one doesn't realise the difficulties that you face.
<div align="right">Originally posted by wishidfoundthissooner - 03 April 2006 : 11:48:43</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
Yes, it is so much easier to advise others and give support because the emotion is removed to a certain extent. We are able to think clearly without the irrational thoughts that plague us with our own difficulties - or emotional hijacking as my therapist calls it.
Just wish I could see a way through my own problems so clearly but I am trying to see and acknowledge any tiny step in the right direction.
Karen
Happiness is not a state to arrive at but a manner of travelling.
You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough ~ Christine Cagney, Cagney & Lacey
:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
I just came here to read your post again because it is so fantastic and I want you to keep coming back here again and again!!!!!
You are a STAR!!!![8D][8D][8D][8D][8D]
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
LOL Fee :D[8D]:D..
Thank you so much!!
Karen xx
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