Hi

[Naty]

I'm not sure what I hope to get out of posting this but here goes...I've been on Citalopram for about a year and a half and previously about 12 years ago.
After a review with my doctor it was felt that I've should up my dose to 40mg (from 20mg), which I did yesterday, as I've seriously hit rock bottom and trying to struggle through work today is a nightmare, I feel so spaced out. I'm constantly thinking about the only way to end this, even more so in the past few days, to the extent of trying to sort out financial things so that no-one has the burden after I'm gone and the best way to go as I wouldn't want to cause any upset to whoever has the misfortune of finding me.
I spend most of the daily drive to work and back with tears streaming down my face and I've pretty much driven my partner away because of my mood swings and irrational behaviour, accusing him of allsorts, so much that he's going for a viewing at another place to live this evening. My children think I am completely miserable, and I know that my current state isn't helping them at all, it may even cause them to have the same issues which is tearing me apart.
I've got an anger management course next Saturday that I've been booked on, but at the minute I feel a bit like 'what's the point.
:-(

[nomorepanic]

Hi Naty

A huge warm welcome to nmp.

You'll get loads of advice and support here and make some lovely friends along the way.

Best wishes

[Bravedart]

Hi Naty :welcome:

Please don't think like that. It sounds that you are going through a hard time at the moment but based on your past experience you'll know you want always feel like this. You'll also know that the increase in meds may take a while to kick in and you may feel up and down until they do. Hang in there and give the meds a chance to kick in and hopfully you'll feel a bit better. You mention you have kids and a partner they probably know you're having a difficult time but also love you very much I presume. Have you taken time off work to give you some breathing space? I'm around if you need to chat. Take care Andrew. :hugs:

[KayleighJane]

hello there, i only joined this site yesterday and already it has been a help and comfort to know that there are other people here who know what its like and are around to offer advice. I'm sure your partner and children love you very much and from my experience they probably just don't know how to react or what to do to make you feel better which is probably frustrating for them. this site has some brilliant advice and information which i keep reading and it makes me feel better if only for a little while.
best of luck. kayleigh x

[Pinkella]

Naty- Iv'e only recently upped my citalopram from 30-40mg...its been two wks now and all the side effects have gone and its starting to kick in,although my psy doc said the full effect of the higher dose can take up to 4-8 wks....but hey after only two wks i'm feeling much better,so hold on in there ((hugs))

[Vanilla Sky]

Hi and welcome to NMP :welcome:
Paige x