I made an offer to buy a house...having anxiety

[sleeplessMom]

I am new here. I have had anxiety and depression probably most of my life, though it wasn't named until 2006 when I had a 'good old fashioned nervous breakdown' and I received great treatment for it. I consider myself mostly recovered. But I still have strong emotions, and still have trouble, like tonight. I came to look at the chatroom, but I see that you cannot chat until you've been registered 5 days. I understand that. Here is my problem: My husband and I have been looking for a new house for a little over a year. In no rush to move, we were waiting for the "right" house. Dare I say, the "perfect" house? We hadn't seen anything since October maybe, and a good one came up yesterday, that we saw today. And put an offer on it tonight, and I can't stop crying. It happened so quickly, you see a house, and less than 7 hours later you have put in an offer. Geez, I think about buying a camera for at least 2 weeks before making a purchase! It wasn't perfect, but we thought we could live with it. Maybe we settled, but maybe it was time to settle. I may have talked my husband into it a little, because I felt like I could live there, and it is a nice house, but with a couple drawbacks that I am worried are going to be big nuisances for us...that we are trying to get away from. But it is so hard to know...I mean, you can't live there for a week and see if you like it. I felt from when I saw the photos and the info, that we were going to put an offer on it. But now I am second guessing myself all over the place. Maybe I talked myself into it just because I had that feeling. What if it is the wrong house? And I didn't wait for the right one? It may be a mistake, and buying the wrong house is a whopper. I just can't sleep, and keep crying. It is a very big decision and maybe I'm just overwhelmed. I do cry a lot when I get overwhelmed. And am i overwhelmed because it is a big deal and I am so so tired, or am I overwhelmed because I just made the wrong decision???

[shoegal]

Hello. Congratulations on being brave and taking the plunge. I think you are overwhelmed because you made a BIG decision, not because you made the wrong decision. Nobody ever knows for sure if they are making the right decision but you have to take chances in life. It felt right at the time and that's why you made the offer. Moving house is a very stressful life event and that's why you're feeling anxious. I'm sure it's just your anxiety talking.

Good luck in your new home. :flowers:

[diane07]

I always go by my instincts in life, and i always say normally if you follow them, you will be right.

There was obviously something that made you want to go for the house, and now its probably good old anx clouding your thoughts, why don't you make an appointment for another viewing and see what your thoughts are then.

di x

[ditzygirl]

Moving house, choosing a house is a very emotional event for women in particular, even if you dont' suffer anxiety.

Has it occurred to you that you might be tearful because you are relieved at finding somewhere you love. We are female, we are allowed to be emotional.lol

A house has to have the "feeling". When you walk in you know its the one for you. No house is perfect there are always pro's and con's. You just have to decide which you can live with.

From my experience of buying and selling houses, I think you have to leave some of it to fate. Sometimes you choose a house and no matter how hard you try it all falls through and your gutted. But something better always turns up.

So as long as this house has the "feeling" for YOU, and you as a family can live with any cons, let fate take its course. If it's meant to be your home it will be.

And don't forget any house move is extremely stressful, I always swear I will never do it again, then an opportunity appears and I do it!!!

Good luck and we are here to support you if it helpsxx

[sleeplessMom]

Thank you all for kind words when I needed them. I barely slept but am managing to go about my day, including my dance exercise class! Got my mind off of it for an hour because I had to concentrate to keep from falling over. Somewhere in the middle of dance class, I remembered when my husband and I were looking at homes 13 years ago, and I remember being so stressed out and unhappy that I wanted to get divorced...I was dividing up property on notebook paper at one point! Well, we found a house, bought it, it wasn't perfect, and we are still married (with two boys now) and living in it, so it helped to remember how difficult it is for me to go through those major life changes.

I did have that "feeling" that it was right. But now my analytical mind is pointing out all the problems that I overlooked, or chose to discard. I drove by again today...it is a nice street, and I saw a realtor there showing it probably to someone else, so maybe they won't even accept our offer! I guess we decided to leave it out of our hands, and whatever happens, happens. I know myself and my anxiety...silly of me to expect that it would be different this time!