Very upset and scared

[angelique]

I am so upset right now I don't know what to do with myself. for some time now I wake up in the morning and I feel this 'fearfullness' and panicky feeling in the pit of my stomach. It's so frightening as I can see that it is slowly but surely pulling me into depression. I also suffer from health anxiety and have done so for most of my life but now it has gotten much worse. I have stopped smoking now for a few months and instead of feeling better for it, I feel worse. I had an xray last month and luckily it didn't show up cancer, but i have damaged my lungs over the years of smoking and my breathing is now somewhat compromised. I am now so scared, so the more I focus in on my breathing the worse I seem to be - I want to try and refocus and think of something else but I can't seem to do that so I always feel out of breath. I am also fearful of the future and I think about whether I will need to be hooked up to machines so I can breath - that thought in itself is depressing and even just writing this brings me to tears.
I'm so sorry if none of this makes sense. I just need to write to someone and hopefully get some words of wisdom.
Thank you for reading.

[angelique]

Anyone? Worries me that everyone is getting replies to their concerns except for me :-(

[pinkynicca]

Hello, i can relate to the smoking.. im 56 days cigarette free and im told it takes a while for the body to get back to normal so just hang in there...as far as the morning panic..normal.. i think we all have had that. and sense you recently quit smoking it makes anxiety incredibly bad.. the thoughts your having about the future are just your mind picking on you. i have the same problem and i have no words of wisdom except your not alone. i have convinced my since im constantly dieing from something.

[pinkynicca]

also with the breathing...your lungs are repairing themselves as we speak. your breathing will only get better from here.

[angelique]

also with the breathing...your lungs are repairing themselves as we speak. your breathing will only get better from here.

Thank you Pinkynicca for your kind words. I'm glad that there is someone that understands. In terms of breathing have you had similar issues? Would it be correct to say also that the more one thinks about breathing the worse it gets? Even now as I write to you I'm feeling out of breath - I wish I could just distract myself even for 5 mins. I can't take this anymore.

[miggymoggy]

I can totally relate to this. I have woken up with that same feeling of dread. My stomach is churning. I feel sick. Just want to put my head under the covers and stay in bed.
We all get like this, honestly. I have awful health anxiety at the moment I'm waiting for a camera to put down my stomach and am convinced I have stomach cancer, Don't know how I'm gonna get through the next week till I have it done.
Chin up. Try to think happy thoughts. Thoughts become things.