laurajoy88
07-03-11, 10:29
Hi Everyone
I've been having a good few months since my agrophobic/depressive/high anxiety episodes in november and being put on cit 10mg, then recently upped to 20mg (on the fourth week of 20mg now)
I thought I was getting better but it seems to of all flooded back out of nowhere :(
I went out for a meal with work last friday evening which is a big challenge for me as i hate eating out in resturants (fear of choking) and i was really pleased with myself, and everyone commented on how relaxed i was, and i felt like i could of eaten a main meal after finishing my soup with no problems.. had 2 rose spritzers and had a really good night, no escaping to the toilets or anything!
The next day i was really looking forward to going shopping with my bf in the town.. which is another big challenge for me. But as i got there I felt like I did back int he day.. sweaty palms, lightheaded, reeeeeeeally nervous. We went into debenhams, and up to the top floor no problems. Then coming down in the lift we got to the bottom and something came over me and i went major lightheaded, hugged into my bf who said my body went all limp and faint like, and i immediately pressed the lift button to go back UP to the top floor to escape to the toilets. BLEH! i hate department stores and felt so trapped why was i going back up!!!! i was a shaking mess and sat in the loos for 10 mins spraying my face with water (i have an evian spray thing) and i didnt want to go back out there :( i eventually calmed down adn we went home straight away (went down the escalator this time and got out the shop asap!!)
I just feel really bad because I havent been like that for months now and pretty ashamed that this has happened :(
I feel like my medication has suddenly stopped working. I get these 'mad feelings' when in traffic like "why am i here, whats the purpose of us being here? aaaaaaah!" and even now when typing this my palms are disgusting and sweaty :(
I'm really annoyed with my cbt therapist because hes been on annual leave and ihavent seen anyone for 2 weeks. although i dont think it really helps anyway! I asked my doctor about the medication and she said to try cutting it in half every other day. 1 day 20mg, 1 day 10mg... i dont see how that will help though making it lower! surely higher is better?
Ive had palpatations and a racing heart all weekend and i've seemed to of lost my determination and mojo!
:shrug:
Sorry i've ranted on. Im jsut so fed up and wish this panic would go away for good. i hate living like this :frown:
Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this, i better get back to work now..
xxx
I've been having a good few months since my agrophobic/depressive/high anxiety episodes in november and being put on cit 10mg, then recently upped to 20mg (on the fourth week of 20mg now)
I thought I was getting better but it seems to of all flooded back out of nowhere :(
I went out for a meal with work last friday evening which is a big challenge for me as i hate eating out in resturants (fear of choking) and i was really pleased with myself, and everyone commented on how relaxed i was, and i felt like i could of eaten a main meal after finishing my soup with no problems.. had 2 rose spritzers and had a really good night, no escaping to the toilets or anything!
The next day i was really looking forward to going shopping with my bf in the town.. which is another big challenge for me. But as i got there I felt like I did back int he day.. sweaty palms, lightheaded, reeeeeeeally nervous. We went into debenhams, and up to the top floor no problems. Then coming down in the lift we got to the bottom and something came over me and i went major lightheaded, hugged into my bf who said my body went all limp and faint like, and i immediately pressed the lift button to go back UP to the top floor to escape to the toilets. BLEH! i hate department stores and felt so trapped why was i going back up!!!! i was a shaking mess and sat in the loos for 10 mins spraying my face with water (i have an evian spray thing) and i didnt want to go back out there :( i eventually calmed down adn we went home straight away (went down the escalator this time and got out the shop asap!!)
I just feel really bad because I havent been like that for months now and pretty ashamed that this has happened :(
I feel like my medication has suddenly stopped working. I get these 'mad feelings' when in traffic like "why am i here, whats the purpose of us being here? aaaaaaah!" and even now when typing this my palms are disgusting and sweaty :(
I'm really annoyed with my cbt therapist because hes been on annual leave and ihavent seen anyone for 2 weeks. although i dont think it really helps anyway! I asked my doctor about the medication and she said to try cutting it in half every other day. 1 day 20mg, 1 day 10mg... i dont see how that will help though making it lower! surely higher is better?
Ive had palpatations and a racing heart all weekend and i've seemed to of lost my determination and mojo!
:shrug:
Sorry i've ranted on. Im jsut so fed up and wish this panic would go away for good. i hate living like this :frown:
Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this, i better get back to work now..
xxx