tracey2009
07-03-11, 14:37
I am new to this website and want to tell you my story as I desperately need some advice. I apologise if my post is long but I feel I need to get everything out.
I have always been a 'worrier' as a little girl I would wake up in the night panicking and crying to my mum and dad about what would happen when they die! I have always been able to control my 'worrying' - until 2 years ago when I turned 30! I started having this overhwelming fear of my parents getting elderly! My dad is very fit and active at the moment and I constantly worry about him not being able to cope with old age when he is unable to run and do the things he does now. My fears are made worse when I think about him also suffering from anxiety. (I know that he does although I have never asked him about it) I know that he worries too about getting old.
This is my main worry although I also worry about my brother as he too suffers (I think) and I feel guilty as I am financially better of than he is!!
I went to the docs 2 years ago and they send me for CBT which I hated - think I did not bond with the therapist!!
Now I am worse than ever. I wake up feeling very low and down in the dumps, I worry constantly. Now for the wierd bit: I have a great well paid job, 6 mths ago I moved into a brand new house with my lovely boyfriend, I have a nice car.... But I am so unhappy and my anxiety gets worse as I feel guilty about feeling so unhappy!
I don't have full blown panic attacks but I have a 'feeling' that is there all of the time. The panic hightens maybe every hour or so then calms down a bit but is still there! I have a fear of 'time' now I am 32 and I feel that with every year that we reach I am going to feel worse.
If I feel like this now how will I cope when 1 of my parents does pass away? Will I crack up completely?
Now I am 32 I am also starting to think about starting a family, but how can I do this when I am the way I am.
When I was younger I could always stop the anixiety as I would tell myself "oh you don't need to worry about that yet" - now my family are getting older all of the time and I am worried sick.
I go to work every day but I have no interest in anything/my sex drive has been effected and I just worry and panic constantly.
I fear that this is the way I am now and that there is no help for me.
Anyone have any advice? Do I suffer from GAD or a much more complex panic disorder.
Thanks for listening
Tracy
http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/images/nmp/misc/progress.gif
I have always been a 'worrier' as a little girl I would wake up in the night panicking and crying to my mum and dad about what would happen when they die! I have always been able to control my 'worrying' - until 2 years ago when I turned 30! I started having this overhwelming fear of my parents getting elderly! My dad is very fit and active at the moment and I constantly worry about him not being able to cope with old age when he is unable to run and do the things he does now. My fears are made worse when I think about him also suffering from anxiety. (I know that he does although I have never asked him about it) I know that he worries too about getting old.
This is my main worry although I also worry about my brother as he too suffers (I think) and I feel guilty as I am financially better of than he is!!
I went to the docs 2 years ago and they send me for CBT which I hated - think I did not bond with the therapist!!
Now I am worse than ever. I wake up feeling very low and down in the dumps, I worry constantly. Now for the wierd bit: I have a great well paid job, 6 mths ago I moved into a brand new house with my lovely boyfriend, I have a nice car.... But I am so unhappy and my anxiety gets worse as I feel guilty about feeling so unhappy!
I don't have full blown panic attacks but I have a 'feeling' that is there all of the time. The panic hightens maybe every hour or so then calms down a bit but is still there! I have a fear of 'time' now I am 32 and I feel that with every year that we reach I am going to feel worse.
If I feel like this now how will I cope when 1 of my parents does pass away? Will I crack up completely?
Now I am 32 I am also starting to think about starting a family, but how can I do this when I am the way I am.
When I was younger I could always stop the anixiety as I would tell myself "oh you don't need to worry about that yet" - now my family are getting older all of the time and I am worried sick.
I go to work every day but I have no interest in anything/my sex drive has been effected and I just worry and panic constantly.
I fear that this is the way I am now and that there is no help for me.
Anyone have any advice? Do I suffer from GAD or a much more complex panic disorder.
Thanks for listening
Tracy
http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/images/nmp/misc/progress.gif