Erin27
09-03-11, 19:04
I've suffered panic attacks, anxiety and depression almost all of my adult life and go through phases when I'm fine and phases when things are a real struggle. One of the things that makes me worse is change and new / uncertain situations. These things affect me really badly and make me feel sick, panicky, dizzy, unwell, nervous and a really awful hot flushing feeling spreads throughout my body.
I recently started a new job less than 3 weeks ago and its something which Im really interested in doing and something which will tie in with my future studies when I go back to uni in September. The team are lovely and my boss is really reasonable and supportive (although they obviously dont know anything about how Im feeling!!)
I should be really excited and happy to be working for an organisation thats really competitive to get into and I should feel priviledged to work there.... but instead I feel awful and over the weekend I had a bad panick and couldnt stop crying and got myself in a state. I fear this is starting to happen again and I dont know how to handle it.
I dont want to keep harping on about things to my friends as they have their own problems and there's nothing actually wrong. I should be feeling the opposite to the way I do. Im also really anxious about going back to study and largely feeling the pressure as Iv told all of my family and friends of my plans and everyone's behind me with it - I worry every day that Im doing the right thing and its making me ill when I think about the stress Il be putting myself under. I know I can do it and am not scared of the hard work but the panic stops me sometimes and things become so overwhelming!!!
I also have chronic fatigue and struggle to cope with working (physically) which makes the mental stress difficult to deal with. My bosses dont know about this either and Im so worried Im taking on too much.... its a fairly mild case of ME / fatigue but still poses to be a problem a lot of the time.
.... I guess itl just take some time to settle into a new situation and I know Ive come through similar situations many, many times before.... will things work out??? Can I handle all this? We've also suffered a couple of very sudden bereavements recently which could be adding to my upset.
Thanks,
Erin x
I recently started a new job less than 3 weeks ago and its something which Im really interested in doing and something which will tie in with my future studies when I go back to uni in September. The team are lovely and my boss is really reasonable and supportive (although they obviously dont know anything about how Im feeling!!)
I should be really excited and happy to be working for an organisation thats really competitive to get into and I should feel priviledged to work there.... but instead I feel awful and over the weekend I had a bad panick and couldnt stop crying and got myself in a state. I fear this is starting to happen again and I dont know how to handle it.
I dont want to keep harping on about things to my friends as they have their own problems and there's nothing actually wrong. I should be feeling the opposite to the way I do. Im also really anxious about going back to study and largely feeling the pressure as Iv told all of my family and friends of my plans and everyone's behind me with it - I worry every day that Im doing the right thing and its making me ill when I think about the stress Il be putting myself under. I know I can do it and am not scared of the hard work but the panic stops me sometimes and things become so overwhelming!!!
I also have chronic fatigue and struggle to cope with working (physically) which makes the mental stress difficult to deal with. My bosses dont know about this either and Im so worried Im taking on too much.... its a fairly mild case of ME / fatigue but still poses to be a problem a lot of the time.
.... I guess itl just take some time to settle into a new situation and I know Ive come through similar situations many, many times before.... will things work out??? Can I handle all this? We've also suffered a couple of very sudden bereavements recently which could be adding to my upset.
Thanks,
Erin x