Dansmam
22-03-11, 17:24
hello,
I'm new to this site. I have a health phobia which has stretched over the past 15 years.
It started 15 years ago when I found a lump in my left breast. It turned out to be nothing- trauma caused by my 3 yr old elbowing me but I was convinced the doctors had missed something. After months of cognitive therapy I was a lot calmer and although the panic attacks would return fleetingly now and then I managed my anxiety.
Last Easter I found another lump and although the doctor reassured me he didn't think it was anything to worry about I spiralled out of control and ended up on diazapam ( not that it helped much ) anyway after a mammogram and scan it was proven to be a harmless cyst.
Yesterday I received an appointment for a routine breast screening mammogram and you'd think someone had handed me a death sentence!
I rang the hospital and asked if it was necessary as I'd had a mammogram just under a year ago. I was told that if I wasn't concerned about anything I could leave it till next year. I wasn't concerned at that point so cancelled till next year.
Now I can't get it out of my mind. the fear,the worry, convincing myself that there's something wrong. what if they find something ? then I think " Find what, you silly moo?!" up until I received this appointment it hadn't crossed
my mind,my boobs were the last thing on my mind!
I'm really disappointed in myself. There will have been hundreds of these appointments sent out yesterday and not everyone will have convinced themselves that they are dying by now. How can I go through life with this constant fear?
Sorry for going on so long,
Jan
I'm new to this site. I have a health phobia which has stretched over the past 15 years.
It started 15 years ago when I found a lump in my left breast. It turned out to be nothing- trauma caused by my 3 yr old elbowing me but I was convinced the doctors had missed something. After months of cognitive therapy I was a lot calmer and although the panic attacks would return fleetingly now and then I managed my anxiety.
Last Easter I found another lump and although the doctor reassured me he didn't think it was anything to worry about I spiralled out of control and ended up on diazapam ( not that it helped much ) anyway after a mammogram and scan it was proven to be a harmless cyst.
Yesterday I received an appointment for a routine breast screening mammogram and you'd think someone had handed me a death sentence!
I rang the hospital and asked if it was necessary as I'd had a mammogram just under a year ago. I was told that if I wasn't concerned about anything I could leave it till next year. I wasn't concerned at that point so cancelled till next year.
Now I can't get it out of my mind. the fear,the worry, convincing myself that there's something wrong. what if they find something ? then I think " Find what, you silly moo?!" up until I received this appointment it hadn't crossed
my mind,my boobs were the last thing on my mind!
I'm really disappointed in myself. There will have been hundreds of these appointments sent out yesterday and not everyone will have convinced themselves that they are dying by now. How can I go through life with this constant fear?
Sorry for going on so long,
Jan