Ridiculous Panic

[SuziDusk]

I have an appointment with the Bank this morning, only to open an account, but I havent been there before and despite my daughter coming with me, I am in a real state. I have been into chat but unfortunately no one is there, so I just thought I would ask if this is just me being stupid as I feel it, or do others have panic symptoms when they are going to new places??

I feel sick, my breathing is racing and I am shaking like a leaf, and well, lets just say I have got a bit of a dicky stomach. Been 3 times in the last half an hour.

Why at the age of 52 do these things make me panic?? I am agoraphobic, but going out with my daughter as a rule I am fine, but this, because of the fact I have to go to the bank and its something I havent had to face for many years, I am a mess. I want to cancel it, but I have already had to cancel it 3 times so I cant do it again, I have to face my demons, but its so hard and I am going to be in such a state when I get there, thats if my daughter can get me in there!!! I needed just to talk to someone, but obviously there isnt going to be ppl in chat all the time, so I need some help as to how I can get myself into a decent frame of mind so I can face these what most people would say normal things. Its stupid, I feel stupid and I dont know what to do!!

:weep:

[SuziDusk]

Just one thing I forgot, sorry, my head is all over the place, I am awaiting OT and CBT, so I have no idea of how to cope with this and get myself through going there, as I am sure once I am there I will be OK. So I need someone to give me some advice how to handle this dreadful panic before I leave and on my way there. Is there something I can do, its too late for this morning, I have been on the phone to my daughter who basically just got angry with me, which hasnt helped I just wanted some one to listen to me, but she just started getting angry with me because she is saying I am coming with you so you will be OK, but this isnt the point, I thought it would help as I normally go into town with her, but doing something like this is new, for her and for me, so its no wonder she is getting angry and I am just in a worse state than I was.

[SuziDusk]

Hi,

Well, I did it, I got there, on my own I may add as told my daughter that I would rather go on my own as would have meant waiting for her and having time to stand and worry, so I got myself off, OK I was early, but I got to the bank and had to wait there, but got used to my surroundings and the guy I saw was lovely. He had obviously been told by the guy who I had spoken to a number of times on the phone and was aware of my circumstances, so it all went smoothly. I now have a bank account, just waiting on getting all my bits and bobs, but its done and the sky didnt fall in or nor did I get eaten by any crocodilipigs or liotigersoruses, so that is one thing I have done when I could have and very nearly did, pick up the phone and cancel again.

I am so stupid, I know its just the fear of going, its not the actual act of being there, as its nothing that is going to be a matter of life or death, and I know if I have to go again I will be fine as I now know the place and I feel safe. So thanks fed, I told the negative feelings to sod off and went for it and I feel really pleased with myself, so much so I treated myself to some new makeup and a hair colour ( its left me skint as it came to £35 but hey, its not often I treat myself to things as I have to watch the pennies big style, so it was a good excuse LOL).

So, I know that next time I have to face something new again or something that I find a bit scary I am going to probably go into meltdown again, but at least I have the knowledge that its the fear of going not the actual thing I am doing that is the problem so when I do start my therapy I can now explain what is happening in this messed up head of mine and hopefully they will be able to give me some coping mechanisms or someway of stopping this stupid panic I seem to get.

:yesyes:

[macc noodle]

Hi,

Well, I did it, I got there, on my own I may add as told my daughter that I would rather go on my own as would have meant waiting for her and having time to stand and worry, so I got myself off, OK I was early, but I got to the bank and had to wait there, but got used to my surroundings and the guy I saw was lovely. He had obviously been told by the guy who I had spoken to a number of times on the phone and was aware of my circumstances, so it all went smoothly. I now have a bank account, just waiting on getting all my bits and bobs, but its done and the sky didnt fall in or nor did I get eaten by any crocodilipigs or liotigersoruses, so that is one thing I have done when I could have and very nearly did, pick up the phone and cancel again.

I am so stupid, I know its just the fear of going, its not the actual act of being there, as its nothing that is going to be a matter of life or death, and I know if I have to go again I will be fine as I now know the place and I feel safe. So thanks fed, I told the negative feelings to sod off and went for it and I feel really pleased with myself, so much so I treated myself to some new makeup and a hair colour ( its left me skint as it came to £35 but hey, its not often I treat myself to things as I have to watch the pennies big style, so it was a good excuse LOL).

So, I know that next time I have to face something new again or something that I find a bit scary I am going to probably go into meltdown again, but at least I have the knowledge that its the fear of going not the actual thing I am doing that is the problem so when I do start my therapy I can now explain what is happening in this messed up head of mine and hopefully they will be able to give me some coping mechanisms or someway of stopping this stupid panic I seem to get.

:yesyes:

Absolutely fantastic - well done you!:D:yahoo:

Reading your posts on this, I am so impressed how you got on top of things and went ahead, faced your demons, and did the deal!!!!

Onward and upward from now on SuzieDusk - you are an inspiration to other sufferers.

Jan

xx

[Cristopher M. Bellow]

You really need to be confident about your activities. You are in a Panic state of mind, but as you know, there's always a solution for all sort of problems. I guess you need to do some meditation and set your mind free from all irrational thoughts. Hope it helps you..

[SuziDusk]

Thanks for your messages of encouragement, and it does just prove the point that the fear of going is the problem, not actually going if you get what I mean. I have proved to myself once again that I can do things, I just need to find a coping mechanism to deal with the worry about going and how to control these irrational panic attacks. Hopefully this is where my Occupational Therapy and my CBT will come in when I eventually get an appointment!!

I went to the hospital yesterday with my daughter for her first scan she is 13 weeks pregnant and I was busy doing bits and bobs before I went, and when I realised how late it was getting it was a case of just getting my bag and sunglasses (yes the sun is shining in the Isle of Man for once lol) and I was fine. So maybe the key in the meantime is not to just sit and worry but to keep busy if I can, mind you having said that, it was the hospital which I am used to and I was going with my daughter so I had my saftey blanket so to speak, so it was something that I can cope with pretty well.
The good thing is I got to see my 4th grandchild, and too early to see the sex, but whatever it looked so amazingly clear, I couldnt belive how much it had improved since I went with her with her last one 6 years ago. Its a big looking baby, and bless it it was sucking its thumb, which was just what she used to do until she was about 16 so like mother like baby lol. So it was something that I really enjoyed and we had a good laugh as well as the father came along and they are no longer together, and we had fun taking the mick out of him as he turned up on his skateboard and a rasta beret (he is 25), no accounting for tastes I guess but she did love him at the time, until after asking her to marry him when he found out she was pregnant he panicked and that was that, still at least they still get on as friends so thats one thing I dont have to worry about.

Thanks again
Suzi
:yahoo: