All I do is worry.

[letitgo]

I have a very stressful life! I go off to school at 6am and get home at 8pm. Yes, it's horrible. I don't spend time with my family and every time I get home I start worrying about hundreds of things. You know, most of the things I worry about are irrational. When I'm at school, sometimes, I have a hard time concentrating. I have so many things going on in my head. Like last week I worried about what people thought of me when I coughed. Were they thinking I'm annoying? That I should stop coughing? "What a pain in the ass, somebody get this boy out of here, he's bothering me?"
I really don't know. I also worry about anxiety attacks. I try to seat next to the classroom door, so if something happens to me, I can get out of the classroom fast. The thing is, at my school, you can't get out of the classroom in the middle of the class. You have to wait until it's over. This makes me more anxious. Anxiety attacks makes me nauseous, which sucks. At least tomorrow I'm seeing a psychiatrist. I wonder if I can ask him to write a note to my school saying I have anxiety issues, and that I should be allowed to get out of the classroom if I really need to.
I also worry about all sorts of stuff. Irrational things. Maybe it's Pure-O, idk.
I worry about pain. Phantom pain. Phantom itching. Phantom everything.
Schizophrenia freaks me out! I was going to watch "Black Swan," but I saw the trailer, and apparently the woman thinks she's turning into a swan, or something like that. Idk, but isn't that schizophrenia? I'm not seeing that movie anymore.
Anyway, I obsess about everything. I'm also part of stuckinadoorway, but, most of the time, I can't really relate to OCD. I don't have compulsions and I don't think I'll become a serial killer. I worry about other things, as you might've seen.

Idk, I'm not a sad person. I'm just a worried person. An anxious person. An incredibly anxious person.

Seeing a psychiatrist tomorrow will probably make me feel better. I'm hopeful it will. :yesyes:

[shoegal]

Hello. I think talking to the psychiatrist tomorrow is a good idea and yes, I do think you should ask them to speak to your teachers/school so you have permission to leave the classroom if you need to because you suffer from panic attacks. I had the same problem when I was at school and I was allowed to leave the room if I needed to. I rarely did because KNOWING that I could leave made me feel more relaxed!

I think people at school always worry about what other pupils think of them but try not to obsess over those thoughts too much. I'm sure people don't find you annoying just because you coughed (everybody coughs)!

Good luck with your appointment with the psychiatrist tomorrow. Be as honest as you can so you get all the help and support you need. Take care. :)