I had to leave work yesterday :(

[MeganBooker]

I had to leave work yesterday due to panic / anxiety. This is the first time this issue of mine has won at work. I feel so down about myself and dreading going back 2morrow.
I have suffered for 20 plus years from these attacks but have always been able to control them at work.
I went to the doctor and have new pills Seroquel XR. I know if I dont go back 2morrow I never will..... I have to win this fight. It has taken every other part of my life.
I have been reading every1 elses problems and comments but I need to know - does anyone actually ever 100% beat this thing or will it always be such a struggle?

[James82]

I know exactly how you feel as I'm sure most of the members here do. I have found it helps if your employers know about it, although it always seems hard if not impossible to approach them, they'll be more than understanding.

I always have a hard time at work, I've had to leave many times simply because I can't focus etc. I have found that if I'm not busy doing things they are more frequent. Luckly my employer is more than happy for me to work from home and they are completely flexible.

My panic attacks actually started because of work and I believe this is the case for many here. It's certainly the opinion of many drs I've seen who directly relate issues like these to work related stress.

Well done for lasting 20 years without a single day having to leave the office, that's pretty amazing! You shouldn't think of this as a failure though, not at all, if a runner runs 8 hour laps every day for 20 years, at some point they'll have tripped up. But you can always get back up on your feet and carry on :)

[Ellis81]

Hiya - I know how you feel, i've been off work now for 3 weeks because of the same thing...cant bear thought of going back and yet Ive worked there 8 yrs! it didnt help when I had an episode where I had to go outside the building to get some air, I told the relevant people I needed to go home as I couldnt get myself back into a normal state of mind - it was 20mins till home time anyway. When I came in the following wk petrified - my manager pulled me in a tiny office to have a word with me about going home! well of course this didnt help plus the fact that she said if I was going to have an attack I cant go outside I should sit still tell someone etc - hello I cant even speak if Im having one! I explained that if she tried to stop me Id be worse and feel petrified I tried explaing my problem but she couldnt understand - just looked at me like I was mad...I wish people understood more about Panic Disorder...doctor signed me off since then and Im scared about going back - but I cant leave it too long...all the questions from people too.I even thought about changing my job now and doing less hours!
You seem to have done well for so long - I agree with James dont let it set you back at all - stay strong chin up and carry on dont let it beat you :hugs:

[MeganBooker]

Thanks for you replies.... makes me feel a little better. I know I cant put going back to work off - or it will make it worse. I explained my condition to a co-worker (who had to cover for me to go home). I was amazed at how understanding she was and she even mailed me to check on me. She told me not to tell my boss as it can be seen as a sign of weakness - I know she was just trying to help but it has made me feel worse:( I just cant believe I let this dang thing win that day................... NEVER again...... I hope

[itwillbeokay]

I had a panic attack at work on Monday. I was terrified, everything felt werid, people seemed different. I was paranoid, felt overwhelmed and just wanted to go home. I had only 20 minutes left of my shift so just lasted it out, although not very productively! Tuesday was my day off and I was dreading going back. I've been feeling quite scared/panicky since then. I decided to go off sick. I feel work is triggering it although now I'm also feeling crap at home. I feel right now it's spiralling out of control a little. I don't want to go out either just so I don't have to be surrounded by lots of people, I work in a supermarket which doesnt help! I even feel anxious about taking this time off work, I'm scared I'll never want to leave the house, that I'll never want to go back to work, that I won't ever have a life again. I'm going to make a doctors appointment and ask for help. x

[anxious_girl]

I know how you guys feel - I feel so embarrased having panic attacks and takiing time off for anxiety - just feel like I'm taking advantage or something like that, and peope react in funny ways because it's not something physical you can see.

[MeganBooker]

Well guys I did it!!!!!!!!!! Went back to work this morning and I actually felt calm.... Putting it off would have been the worst thing I could have done. Then I would have dreaded going back over the weekend. I went.. I did it... I won!!!! Feeling good atm :) Yay me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IT will be OK!!!!! U can do it!!!

[Jemlou]

Well done you! Treat yourself to something nice after work!

[blueangel]

Well done Megan for getting yourself back in there - that's a really good achievement. I have suffered with anxiety for most of my life, but luckily for me it has only very rarely stopped me from getting into work - I think the last time I had to take time off directly with anxiety was 23 years ago. You're dead right though - don't let the anxiety ake this away from you, and keep at it.

[JT69]

Well done Megan!! You should be so proud of yourself....the longer the leave it the worse it is...you did it!!! Yahoo!!!

Jo.xx

[munkeyinblack]

Well done! love reading when sumone does well! good for u :)