karenjudy
31-03-11, 16:12
Hi I am Karen, have been suffering from anxiety and panic disorder for over 20 years, you would have thought in that time I would have learnt to live with it but everytime it happens it catches me out.
Married with 3 children one of which has now left home have a full time job as a Manager but also work with my husband which is a bonus as he gives me alot of great support.
Have had loads of counselling over the years tried medication for about a year then fell pregnant so came off of it, went back on after but made me feel worse so have always kept off of it and favoured relaxation and fresh air oh and loads of reading which takes your mind off somewhere else.
Always a struggle to get up everyday and all the things I should look forward to like holidays nights out (not that I go out) make me feel like I am going to the doctors which really frustrates me.
I love this site because it gives you in depth information about the majority of symptoms I personally go through and that's what you have to remember when your in the middle of a whirlwind. Sitting here writing about it makes me laugh but I know how real it is and frightening. I have alot of other symptoms as well that come and go.
I would dearly love to me normal although normal is probably not the right word, but to be able to go away for a weekend and not feel tied up in knots, go shopping without feeling the shelves are moving in towards me and thinking I am going to faint at the checkout. Have a conversation with someone without getting tounge tied and my mind going blank. Have fun with my kids without feeling guilty about the times when I feel so ill and frightened I cant even speak to them but inside I just want to reach out and hug them. Drive further than my place of work by myself without feeling panicy. Go out by myself and walk without behind frightened of people I meet on the way, constantly thinking people are staring at me.
Stop feeling inferior of others and say what I really feel, everything I want to do and say is there in my head ready to go but it just never happens.
One thing that amazes me is that there are so many people on here but I have never actually met someone who has an anxiety disorder of sorts and have never witnessed someone having an attack, are we really that good at hiding it.
A few things that do keep me going apart from here is my rule of 'if you want something done, do it yourself' which keeps me on my toes and active instead of hiding behind the front door which is all too easy and those good old books 'Self help for your nerves' by Dr Claire Weeks she really makes it simple and they always give me a boost when I feel like I am scraping along the ground, Oh and Bon Jovi, his music has really got me through some tough times over the last 25 years..Many thanks Jon!!:whistles:
To all out there keep your chin up and if all else fails keep smiling cos it makes people wonder what your up to.:D
Married with 3 children one of which has now left home have a full time job as a Manager but also work with my husband which is a bonus as he gives me alot of great support.
Have had loads of counselling over the years tried medication for about a year then fell pregnant so came off of it, went back on after but made me feel worse so have always kept off of it and favoured relaxation and fresh air oh and loads of reading which takes your mind off somewhere else.
Always a struggle to get up everyday and all the things I should look forward to like holidays nights out (not that I go out) make me feel like I am going to the doctors which really frustrates me.
I love this site because it gives you in depth information about the majority of symptoms I personally go through and that's what you have to remember when your in the middle of a whirlwind. Sitting here writing about it makes me laugh but I know how real it is and frightening. I have alot of other symptoms as well that come and go.
I would dearly love to me normal although normal is probably not the right word, but to be able to go away for a weekend and not feel tied up in knots, go shopping without feeling the shelves are moving in towards me and thinking I am going to faint at the checkout. Have a conversation with someone without getting tounge tied and my mind going blank. Have fun with my kids without feeling guilty about the times when I feel so ill and frightened I cant even speak to them but inside I just want to reach out and hug them. Drive further than my place of work by myself without feeling panicy. Go out by myself and walk without behind frightened of people I meet on the way, constantly thinking people are staring at me.
Stop feeling inferior of others and say what I really feel, everything I want to do and say is there in my head ready to go but it just never happens.
One thing that amazes me is that there are so many people on here but I have never actually met someone who has an anxiety disorder of sorts and have never witnessed someone having an attack, are we really that good at hiding it.
A few things that do keep me going apart from here is my rule of 'if you want something done, do it yourself' which keeps me on my toes and active instead of hiding behind the front door which is all too easy and those good old books 'Self help for your nerves' by Dr Claire Weeks she really makes it simple and they always give me a boost when I feel like I am scraping along the ground, Oh and Bon Jovi, his music has really got me through some tough times over the last 25 years..Many thanks Jon!!:whistles:
To all out there keep your chin up and if all else fails keep smiling cos it makes people wonder what your up to.:D