lilyloves
16-04-11, 23:19
Hi im new, i just found this forum, and wondered if i could share my experience and look for some support,
Its a huge long story, but when i was in my 20s i suffered with panic attacks,huge big frightening ones that came from nowhere, i then had 2 small children and a husband who i didnt like very much, i went for CBT in 2000, which helped a great deal, and it helped me understand how unhappy i was , moving on 14 years later,
im now a divorced single working mum of 3, im strong and independent,and generally very happy with my life, but once again in the last few months my panic attacks have returned,but this time they are worse, i cant get on the tube to go to work anymore, im terrified that i have cancer, that my children are poorly, that the worlds going to end in 2012, i read a great deal, and watch far to my news,i have a co dependent personality, and am a great worrier, tho i do try and hide it,
but these panic attacks last for days, ive nearly finished one tonight thats lasted since last night, i woke up at 3am this morning and my hands were bent up, cold, and i felt that i couldnt open my mouth, then came the worry that my children would find me dead in bed in the morning, so i got up, and spent the whole day crying,and panicking that i have cancer or had a stroke, now i know these are symtoms and that my cold hands and feet arent a blood clot, its the blood being taken away as my hearts pumping while i hyperventoilate,
I went to my doctor last week, and they were very good, i had the triage nurse call me and my scores were 16 and 19 for anxiety, but i dont feel depressed, i have a one to one meeting on the 3rd of may, then either group or internet.
I didnt want anti depressants, as i read all the paperwork that comes in the box, and the side affects scare me too much, however when it all gets too much, i take 1/2 a co comadol, which helps, but then im concerned how i might become addicted to codine.
Im just so upset theyve come back and i cant control them this time,i dont know why or theys no reason for them to come back, ive had no stressful situtations , works a little qiuet, but my children are good, i dont have much debt, but why am i being controlled again, by something i felt i had dealt with?
Im not sure what im really asking for, but i feel better for sharing it and writing it down, again so sorry for the long post, i just want it to stop and i dont know how too
Its a huge long story, but when i was in my 20s i suffered with panic attacks,huge big frightening ones that came from nowhere, i then had 2 small children and a husband who i didnt like very much, i went for CBT in 2000, which helped a great deal, and it helped me understand how unhappy i was , moving on 14 years later,
im now a divorced single working mum of 3, im strong and independent,and generally very happy with my life, but once again in the last few months my panic attacks have returned,but this time they are worse, i cant get on the tube to go to work anymore, im terrified that i have cancer, that my children are poorly, that the worlds going to end in 2012, i read a great deal, and watch far to my news,i have a co dependent personality, and am a great worrier, tho i do try and hide it,
but these panic attacks last for days, ive nearly finished one tonight thats lasted since last night, i woke up at 3am this morning and my hands were bent up, cold, and i felt that i couldnt open my mouth, then came the worry that my children would find me dead in bed in the morning, so i got up, and spent the whole day crying,and panicking that i have cancer or had a stroke, now i know these are symtoms and that my cold hands and feet arent a blood clot, its the blood being taken away as my hearts pumping while i hyperventoilate,
I went to my doctor last week, and they were very good, i had the triage nurse call me and my scores were 16 and 19 for anxiety, but i dont feel depressed, i have a one to one meeting on the 3rd of may, then either group or internet.
I didnt want anti depressants, as i read all the paperwork that comes in the box, and the side affects scare me too much, however when it all gets too much, i take 1/2 a co comadol, which helps, but then im concerned how i might become addicted to codine.
Im just so upset theyve come back and i cant control them this time,i dont know why or theys no reason for them to come back, ive had no stressful situtations , works a little qiuet, but my children are good, i dont have much debt, but why am i being controlled again, by something i felt i had dealt with?
Im not sure what im really asking for, but i feel better for sharing it and writing it down, again so sorry for the long post, i just want it to stop and i dont know how too