Terrorism fears/holidays

[kitty18]

Hi there. I've been absent from the forums for quite a long time, because my anxiety (I usually suffer from health anxiety, if anything) has been under control for a while. I have mild bouts of depression, on and off, which I'm also managing well with. But recently I've been quite affected by the news and have general anxiety about travelling, especially abroad. I'm afraid of terror attacks, even moreso with the news yesterday and the much higher threat level we are now all facing with imminent revenge attacks.

We are due to holiday in Italy in September. We've been to the place in question before, so I am familiar with it and looking forward to going - but I'm very nervous about getting there and back, which means I haven't actually booked the trip (hotel or flight) yet. I keep putting it off. My husband hasn't twigged yet, as there is really no rush to book, but we should really do it within the next month or so.

My main issue is that, our first choice of flight happens to be on September 11 - the 10 year anniversary of 9/11. I know this should have no significance, but I'm a superstitious person and would rather not fly on that day. So I told myself, 'just fly earlier or later in September.' But then I started suffering from paranoia - imagining that terrorism will be EXPECTED on 11th September, so the days surrounding it may be even more dangerous since it's not 'expected.' I know deep down that it IS still expected, that the security will not go down drastically, but I am still plagued with worry and don't know the best decision to make. I've even thought about skipping September altogether, and going in October. Like this will make it any safer! But I don't know, it's a psychological thing.

Even if I want to delay the trip, my husband will probably have an issue with it, as he did want to go in early September, and I have already booked and then cancelled a hotel because of this (for the same reason... he talked me round and then we decided to book Italy instead). He is understanding that I have anxiety, but he tends to think it's mostly all behind me now, and doesn't like it when I am irrational. He is naturally a very rational person, which is good sometimes as it keeps me balanced. But it doesn't help when I am panicked because he just quotes statistics at me... I know the odds, and I know I am being irrational, I just need methods to calm down and not worry. Sometimes even hard facts can't do that.

So I don't want to tell him 'hey, let's go in October instead shall we?' just because I want to avoid September. :( Unfortunately, we also need to fly at the end of September for a conference he is going to - which is making me nervous enough as it is. I would be even more nervous if he was going alone! But thankfully I can go with him. I can't avoid what date we fly out for that, so I guess I just want to feel in control with our own holiday.

I guess what I'm looking for is any help and guidance, or just comfort in that I'm not alone in these thoughts. I would also like advice on what action to take - should I just go ahead and book in September? I will probably avoid September 11 anyway, but even anywhere close to it is making me fearful. How ridiculous am I being? :(

xx

[theoldcorner]

Hi Kitty18,

I've only flown once since 1997 so I completely see where you are coming from. After 9/11 I thought flying would be a No-No. I took a 50 minute flight to Amsterdam just to say I had done something to combat the fear. But, even now, the idea still make me quake. I think my wife has given up on us going anywhere like New York etc.

Is it possible to take the Eurostar and sell it to your husband as a 'romantic' journey?

My heart goes out to you. I hate seeing my friends and workmates telling me of their trips abroad and I desperatley want to see more of the world than Blackpool!

I hope you're able to find a solution.
Best wishes
Shaun :)

[suzy-sue]

Security is really tight at airports now .Due to the recent news this will make things even tighter .You cant put you life on hold because of a minority of fanatics .I do understand why you feel so worried but you have more chance having a car accident before this than being involved in a terrorist attack .Terrorist s dont just use airoplanes and Trains have been targets in countries like Spain .Think of all the hundreds of flighs each day and the millions who travelled safely .Giving in to this will not only keep you anxious but is what these low lives want .Enjoy you holiday and you will be so glad you went in more ways than one .Take plenty of distractions for the journey .Theres no form of Travel that is 100% safe at the best of times .Security is second to none now .Especially here and America .sue x

[macc noodle]

Why not travel before the 11/9 or after it?

I personally would not particularly want to be in any major airport at the moment because I do think that reprisals will occur (although it could be anywhere and not just airports) -but that is just my personal fears shining thru!

Tell you hubby how you feel - you need to discuss this because otherwise you will not enjoy your holiday.

Jan
x

[Lindy]

Hey there, I have quite a big fear of flying, and I think this is quite a rational thing to worry about, but maybe the feeling it creates is disproportionate :) The chances of being involved in a terrorism incident is really low, but if it was me I would feel exactly the same way. My anxious self wonders what airport you are flying from/to? Maybe you could pick a smaller one which might be less of an attractive target?

The sensible part of me says pick the flights that suit you the best, then go to your GP explain you have a large fear of flying and get them to prescribe you some valium. This is how I get from a to b around Europe!! (I'm not sure there's enough valium to get me over the atlantic!) Essentially, it doesn't matter what day you fly on, they're all as good as each other risk-wise.

I do agree you should tell your husband how you feel, I am someone who never looks forward to a holiday because of the whole flying thing, and I think it would be a shame for you to feel that way too :)

[Tyke]

Hi Kitty

You are not alone in these fears, and with the recent news it is even more understandable. I never fly anyway, I holiday locally in the UK as I find the whole concept of going away on holiday stressful. In reality though, you are quite safe. We all face much greater risks every day going about our normal lives. Who is to say the next atrocity will involve planes? It could be car bombs or Underground suicide bombers again. Chances are with airport security being high they will try what they see as a softer target some place else.

Tyke