I love rufus
08-05-11, 08:08
Hello All,
Im Melissa and I have been struggling with Anxiety,Panic and the O in OCD (obsessive thoughts) starting when I was 12,im 25 now. I go from being very stable and panic free to very unstable and full of anxiety! I recently lost my job where I was making decent money and am now working a job where im making half of what I made before. I struggle with money and often dont even have money to get to work. My boyfriend and I have been having little fights that led up to a big blowout a couple days ago. So you can imagine what level my anxiety is at now! VERY HIGH. My obsessive thoughts are often Magical thinking which SUCKS. I also suffer from the what-ifs. I recently suffered a crazy panic attack due to magical thinking. My friend has a mirror her mom bought from a tag sale that was supposedly involved in a tragedy and I obsessed that the negative energy from the mirror would rub off onto me. SO SILLY. I know but this is the kind of crap that runs through my head that I cant stop. Last time I got a tattoo the guy used numbing spray with lidocaine and I OBSESSED that the lidocaine had seeped into my skin and was slowly poisoning me. I googled it so much and seriously thought I was dying! My poor boyfriend has to put up with me but thats why I love him so much lol. Im rambling but typing this out made me feel a bit better :)
Im Melissa and I have been struggling with Anxiety,Panic and the O in OCD (obsessive thoughts) starting when I was 12,im 25 now. I go from being very stable and panic free to very unstable and full of anxiety! I recently lost my job where I was making decent money and am now working a job where im making half of what I made before. I struggle with money and often dont even have money to get to work. My boyfriend and I have been having little fights that led up to a big blowout a couple days ago. So you can imagine what level my anxiety is at now! VERY HIGH. My obsessive thoughts are often Magical thinking which SUCKS. I also suffer from the what-ifs. I recently suffered a crazy panic attack due to magical thinking. My friend has a mirror her mom bought from a tag sale that was supposedly involved in a tragedy and I obsessed that the negative energy from the mirror would rub off onto me. SO SILLY. I know but this is the kind of crap that runs through my head that I cant stop. Last time I got a tattoo the guy used numbing spray with lidocaine and I OBSESSED that the lidocaine had seeped into my skin and was slowly poisoning me. I googled it so much and seriously thought I was dying! My poor boyfriend has to put up with me but thats why I love him so much lol. Im rambling but typing this out made me feel a bit better :)