Constantly thinking about my heart SUCKZ

[lourah1989]

can any body tell me if they have the same as me i feel so lost like i just need help a bit of reassurance that im not absolutly nuts ! i constantly check my pulse over and over and over again all day every day, i sleep with my hand on my chest and constantlt feel for my heart to check its okay, but even if it wernt okay im not a doctor so i wudnt now! :lac:but yeah basically iv had this for 6 months its all spiralled from 1 night i woke up with my heart punding i have a feeling it was the drink from the previous night i just remeber feeling like total shit and feeling as though i was going to pass out and die my legs were like jelly all the usual panic attack symptoms ... and from that day on iv gained a anxiety disorder i alway picture my self passed out on the floor no matter were i am i get crazy fluttering in my chest iv been to the docs millions of times he said everythink was okay :/ although i tell my self diffrent :weep: now every day i wake up feeling doomed, i try to stay focused and not think about it but all i ever think about is my heart and how its about to stop working i find is so difficult to breath most times and checking my pulse is driving me crazy ! i want to be normal again but my mind tells my body diffrent i hate it i hate how i am i hate everythink about this shitty disorder right about now nothink i do seems to help me get through the days ! SOME ONE HELP ME AM I CRAZY AT 21 ! :( :scared15:

[PokerFace]

Wow, you sound a lot like me! I developed anxiety over my heart March last year. I've recently turned 21 too so you're not alone in this. :)

All I can say is with the right support and a lot of hard work from yourself things can get better. If the doctor says you're fine, you have to beleive it yourself that you're fine. It's extremely difficult to do this, it won't happen overnight but it's not impossible.

Feeling your pulse and putting your hand on your chest are all behaviours that are adding to your anxiety, it may reassure you in the short term but in the long term all it's doing is feeding the anxiety you have about your heart, you probably feel you HAVE to do these things now or it will have drastic consequences. I used all these saftey behaviours myself, I still do now sometimes when my anxiety is high, I even used to scratch and bruise my chest (accidently) from holding, pinching and poking it too much. I stopped most my saftey behaviours now and can honestly say nothing bad happend.

You say you imagine yourself passed out and it sends you into a panic but just because we imagine something happening to us doesn't mean it absoloutley will happen. It's an intrusive thought and if you don't react to it, it won't fill you with the panic it does now. A lot of anxiety suffers experience intrusive thoughts and some point or another in their anxiety and I've never seen anyone come here and say it actually happend! Let them come and let them go, don't focus or dwell on them, they're just thoughts.

Your first step would be to myabe go back to the doctor and ask about ways to treat anxiety and what support you can get so you can consider options like meds (not compulsary) or see if you can get put on the waiting list for CBT counselling. There's a lot of self help books out there that can really help anxiety sufferers take back control of their lives. You might want to have a look at them, there's a few on the online shop on this website.

You've come to the right place, hopefully you'll learn a lot about anxiety here, coping strategys and tecniques to help calm you down and prevent panic attacks. I've learnt a lot about myself and anxiety from using this site! I've come far in just over a year so there is light at the end of the tunnel. You're gonna be ok :) xx

[MidnightCalm]

I'm 21 too, I have the same issues as you with my heart, it's horrible isn't it, I hope you're okay!

[lourah1989]

yeah it officially sucks its like going round in circles and poker face you are right nothink in the long run ever happens to me, iv made the first step of coming in here for the first time in 6 months i feel as though i found people like me and im not alone in this! iv tried a variety of diffrent med diazapan cipralex setraline propanol the list goes on you name it iv tryed it ! but unfortunatly they all come with mega side effects that mess me up even more :( im on the therapy list but iv gotta wait till the end of the month SUCKS ! but today you people have cheered me up i thought i was alone and every time i speak about it to parents they just said i was mad or nuts or its in ur head thank you so much and midnight we can do it stay strong we r too young for this we shud be out living enjoying life not struggling with this ! hope your okay to babe ! x x x