confused

[jonnyf]

hi guys im just turned 24 ive had anxiety since about 14/15 after taking some recreational drugs and having a few panic attacks.. this lead to an anxiety because i felt i was dying and being so young even the doctor explaining it was only panic attacks. i felt extremely anxious for months and months after. i began to get back to normal life but was forever overly worried about things that might happen and was very sensitive about health related issues.

over the years i have seen my doctor only a couple of times as i kinda lived with it as a constant but controlled anxiety rarely getting to the point of panic..
However 2 days after a punch in the face while out with friends last year i developed vision problems. i was seen to by an ambulance team after the initial assault who said i was fine and i was the next day although very anxious to the point of panic attack which the next morning led to vision problems.. i did see optician who said i was fine and months went by i got back to normal (sort of) but now i have a constant vision issue at stressful times. and anytime i sort of think about it.

weirdly though in the last fee years i feel ive been getting worse and worse anything makes me feel anxious.. the thought of going on holiday because of the flight and being away if i feel ''funny'' whilst so far from home.. a long road trip.. a new job.. new college course.. basically anything.

i have never took meds either. at a bad point last year i was prescribed citalopram but i never took it as i read they could make me feel worse at first.. this was enough to put me off.

im not so much as depressed i always know that the feelings are there but ive been getting through life with them. im just noticing im getting worse instead of better and i need to calm it all down and get a grip.

i always thought facing fear was the best way of dealing with it? thats what a CBT therapist told me but she found me difficult because i understood what was wrong with me completely and faced up to everything that i feared but id still fear everything the next time aswell.

for example i had a panic while watching a gruesome film at the cinema once and the thought of going to a cinema terrifys me but ive been loads of times since but it still gets me every time????

any advice is much welcome..
:hugs:

[cattttt]

You sound like you're pretty onto it and going just the right way. I'm 55 and have had anxiety all my life, sometimes worse than others. Like you, I get anxious about all sorts of things and panic about going places and doing things, but once I get there it's usually alright, but doesn't stop the panic next time. I have to talk myself into going on holiday or whatever, but enjoy it once I get there. Don't have much advice exept stick at it, keep facing up to things and don't let it stop you. I have periods of time when I hardly notice the anxiety, then it jumps up to get me again, it's a matter of learning to live with it, dealing with when it jumps up and making the most of the times when you're ok.

[xJust_Sarahx]

Hi
im 23 now and i have been having bad panic attacks since i was 15/16 and have been diagnosed with a panic disorder - so i know how it feels for it to drag on and get to the stage where u reconize things that can cause a panic attack etc

When im stressed which believe me i get stressed because of my panic disorder and having 3 kids lol.. my head feels like its going to explode and my eyesight does get affected, its hard to describe but its like patchy if you get me? cant make out things clearly.. but i can still see them, and its not the fact i need glasses etc because obviously i get regular eye tests and been told im fine, the doctor says that anxiety can cause all kind of harmless things which make you worry. So i can related to you kinda on that one.

I also hate the fact of starting anywhere new or going anywhere new, i cant bare the thoughts of going on holiday because i feel way out my comfort zone, and when i go anywhere i have to go the same familiar route, and when im walking anywhere it has to be past busy places where i can "get help" if you get me.

Believe me.. facing fear is the best way of dealing with it, i had a really bad panic attack on a bus before and i went for ages and ages without going on a bus because i was scared it would happen, but it came to a point where i had to and i forced myself and i had another panic attack which put me off again, but i thought to myself i will do this and i will do it for my kids, ( my cbt therapist also recommended this) so i did - i just got on a bus to get one thing from town and came back.
I was in a state when i came back but i was relieved i had done it, and it gave me the confidence to do it again.
So yeh the cinema thing you mentioned is completely normal, but you done well not to let it stop you going - wish i could of been like that in the first place :)

if you ever need to chat just message me.

[jonnyf]

ok i really appreciate the kind replies! have any of you tried any medication and if so did it help?
for some reason im sort of against taking meds i think it relates ack to my panic starting from drugs.

im all for trying trying different diets cutting out certain foods etc and also vitamins and supplements.

thats another annoying thing i used to love going to the gym and i still do but i dont feel i can push myself as hard as i worry about passing out etc. also feeling very (cant explain the vision issue) sort of dizzy

again im writing it thinking its a terrible thought but i know i will just go to the gym and cope as always

oh and i know its good to talk about everything but does anyone ever notice it builds it up more talking about it? i feel like i need to just completely forget it and never discuss it and if i feel it do anything not to think about it??

thanks again