Fear of the future?

[Cali54321]

Hi all,

Does anyone fear a future illness? I am terrified of getting skin cancer in the future, although I have been checked and am fine now. I can't seem to shake it and when I wake up in the morning the feelings are the worst.

It's caused me to lose interest in things I love and I'm not really hanging out with friends and family like I used to.

I just have this fear that I'll wake up and there it will be, even though I know that's not how it works....or that I wouldn't catch it or know in time regardless of how vigilant I am. I also find myself observing others who have moles and wondering if anyone has had a few bad sunburns like I have, it's really quite ridiculous :mad:

What the heck is wrong with me!!?!?!?

[anxious eddy]

hi cali i know exactly how you feel i wake up each morning fearing looking or touching any part of my body in case theres a sign of the dreaded c word it consumes my life sometimes the smallest ailment i convince myself is bad ,so nothing is wrong with you except anxiety, did you know someone with skin c i had a few friends sick with c and now im terrified il get it

[Cali54321]

Hi Eddy,

I've never known anyone with skin cancer no, until a couple months ago I never even thought twice about it. I saw a story on a young girl who got it and died at 19, blamed on tanning beds which set me into a panic, I even had moles removed that the doctor said we're fine.

I can't seem to shake this, I guess the other cancers don't scare me as much because I've never known anyone with them either, but for some reason skin cancer terrifies me regardless of how curable and detectable it is thought to be...I feel like my past choices of tanning will come back to bite me. I've smoked too but I quit yet lung cancer does not scare me...

It's completely irrational, but I guess it scares me that one day it will happen....although the worst kind is rare.

I know in my mind odds are I will be fine and live a long happy healthy live...but then I hear..."what if" but "what if"

It's not a fun time that is for sure :(

[Meewah]

Cali

I know what you mean. I had big issues dealing with mortality. Now I just have issues dealing with suffering. I met someone who had been told they had 6-12 months to live and said they did not feel depressed just annoyed that there life had been cut short.

I studied Buddhism for 4 years after that and realised that life is not guaranteed and that not everyone dies in their eighties, as many people die at a young age as they do when they get old. I now know that nothing is certain. We could get hit by a car tomorrow. I started to follow the meditations that concentrated on this fact and I feel I have removed most of my uncontrollable anxiety related to this fact. I now live everyday like its my last.

Mee