Jeanine25
01-06-11, 08:52
can someone try help me figure out what Im suffering from, exactly. I have had worries for a very long time, esp regarding cancer. I am perfectly fine when Im not near a hospital/drs etc, and If I take it upon myself to book an appointment at the drs, Im fine also, however, If I am called into the drs and told I need a test doing or if my family are told they need tests, I freak out. I then sit there for days and days googling possible ''findings'' in blood tests etc and I worry myself silly until I get an answer from the dr (ie: results come back) if the results are good news Im fine after that, ''normal'', even... but its the build up to going into a hospital, seeing a dr I have never met before and waiting on results that drive me nuts. When I had to go for ultrasounds during pregnancy the sonographers thought I were odd and claimed never to have met anyone like me. I explained why I had a phobia and why I was acting the way I was about having a scan (ovarian cancer in the family) but still, I was looked upon as odd... All thru the scans all I could do was talk and ask ''you havent found anything wrong have you'', because thats the only way I knew how to deal with the situation at the time... again, the scan ladies were looking at me as if to say ''please be quiet''.. as soon as Im told alls well, I dart out that place quicker than a rat up a drain pipe, yet nobody can understand why. I am NOT like this constant, its only when Im faced with drs/hospital appointments that have been arranged for me.. I go into complete panic mode. Then after I have seen the dr and looked back on how much I panic, I start worrying people think Im crackers. :( Am I dealing with health anxiety or a specific phobia of drs? as the 2 are different.