Ok, Here goes...

[PleaseHelpMe]

Hello Everyone,

I really don't know exactly how to go about this, but like the title says: Here Goes.

I am a 24 year old educator who cannot stop panicking, freaking out, and picking at my skin. The last part I am not even concious of, apparently I do it all the time, which is humiliating. I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder as a young child and I fear that my issues are developing into an OCD or something equally as serious.

I am joining this forum to seek guidance and help from other people with similar concerns.

I apologize in advance if this post is inappropriate in some way or if it offends.

Thank you,

PHM

[nomorepanic]

Hi PleaseHelpMe

We just wanted to welcome you aboard to NMP. We hope you enjoy your stay here and get all the support and advice you need.

Please take some time to read the website articles on the left as well for loads of advice and tips.

[Nomoredrama]

Hi

What are you panicing about? Try and stop, breath and just think. Clear your mind and write down what your thoughts are. If you are not noticing what you are doing then your mind might be full with to many thoughts. Try some relaxation techniques. I find self-help books to be great.

[PleaseHelpMe]

Thank you for replying. I find that yes, my mind tends to race and in social situations I am just constantly on 'high alert' regardless of whether or not the situation actually warrants any vigilance. I try deep breathing when I remember, but at times I feel like I get to a point where I just can't stop.

I will try a self-help book. I have one at home, but I guess I have been too scared to find out what it might tell me about myself. I am extremely hard on myself and I often feel intense pressure to be perfect and therefore panic/anxiety free, at least in a public sense.

Again, thank you for your kind words and I will try that in the future.

[weevil]

Hi, I've just come back to the site. Are you a teacher? An old girlfriend of mine was, it's a stressful job. She used to chew her fingernails right down and the skin around them.

I wanted to try and reassure you about OCD. I grew up with it, it was never diagnosed, it's obvious to me now but at the time I just thought I was weird. I've found developing anxiety in adulthood to be worse. If you find yourself with OCD behaviour don't worry, you may be surprised at how many people have some kind of obsessive trait when the subject is brought up. It's possible to accept it as I've done with bits that remain.

[PleaseHelpMe]

Weevil, thank you for your encouragement. I am currently a special educator with a behaviorally challenged child. Unfortunately, being out of control is a major trigger for me (and I suspect, everyone else who frequents this site) and the definition of this situation is "PHM, you will never have control here." So, in many ways, this is good for me because it highlights where I need to focus in terms of managing my anxiety (which today has been in the stratosphere) but it is hard to realize that now instead of things I know about, my soothing rituals have become unconcious.

I know a ton of people suffer from OCD like symptoms and that this might just be a function of my increased anxiety. I guess I am just looking for some form of support.

Again, thank you for your response, it is encouraging to know that I may not be as much of a pariah as I imagine.

[weevil]

Also I don't want to trivialise how you feel, it's hard, we want to feel encouraged that other people have experienced and handled the same thing but it's also frustrating at times to feel like your world is collapsing and someone says "everyone feels like that".

I think it does feel worse for us than it probably is but all we know is how we feel. I'm trying to convince myself at the moment that how I feel can change. Since I have ups and downs I sometimes just wait for the worst to pass. What do you usually do for your soothing rituals?