View Full Version : Scared to go out
Sorry I keep posting but I feel I need reassurance. I have been of work for about 10 weeks since having a breakdown. Although I my mood has improved and I am not anxious 24/7 anymore, I am still struggling with building my nerve and confidence to go out. I was staying with my mum for a while and we would go out sometimes, but was always very anxious. I have now moved back home with my fiancé and my mum leaves for France for 3 weeks today. I am terrified I won't beable to do this without her. My fiancé is at work all day, and I find I just stay at home. I can go into my garden and round to see my neighbour, I even went to the shop the other day on my own, but the confidence I felt then seems to have gone (this could be because I am full of cold)
I read posts on here a lot and it seems that many people can lead a relatively 'normal' life with anxiety, going out and still working. I am just scared that I will not get any better then this and I will become a recluse. I have never been a massively sociable person, as I have suffered anxiety for about 17 years, but I have never been this bad!!
I re started taking citalopram 10mg for a week, then 20mg for 4 weeks and now 30mg for 4 weeks. Have I had enough time to feel the true benefits??
Like I said, sorry to keep posting, but would love to know if there are others out there like me? And whether the drugs will work or if I should try others?
I just want to feel better.
Firstly I want to give you some hugs :bighug1:
Back in 2005 I was totaly housebound with my anxiety and panic attacks. I couldnt even make it to the shop over the road from me. I never thought I could be "normal" again but I over came it with the help of my mother, propanalol and time. Basically doing it step by step.. so day one I would say go to end of street, few days later go abit further and so on. It wasnt easy, im not saying it was it was hard and exhausting and lots of tears. I then went from 2005 till 2011 (just recently) with very little panic in my life.. certain situations would make me feel ill so I just stayed away from them and put panic to the back of my mind.
Recently mines geared up alot and i have been feeling panic BIG time when I go out the house. Now I know what I have to do and im back on the propanalol again but this time live 40 miles away from my mam who cant come and "hold my hand" (so to speak) to help me... I have to do this myself. I live with my BF who works very long hours so am alone with my son most days so totally understand how your feeling. Some days are better then others I will admit but I try and get out every day even if its just around the block or to the local shop.
Start setting goals if you can until these feel "safe" so end of the street... whatever or how far YOU want to do... Try and remember that buzz you get when you manage it...
Thanks mardybum (love the name, funnily enough, that's what my fiance calls me!!)
I just find it do hard to build up my confidence, ands it's very annoying!! I used to be able to fake confidence, even when feeling bad, but now I just don't feel I have the strength.
You will get through this too, you have done it before, just remember that.
I feel like I am getting worse every day. I was going up but now I'm going down. I don't want to go back to that horrible place!! I'm hoping I just feel like this now because I have moved home and my mum has gone away, and once I am used to it I will feel a bit brighter. I hope so, so much!!
Hi Ames.. i am also struggling with going out and i pretend to my family that in really happy when im falling apart inside (your not alone) try just short walks like to the shop or go out into the garden i have found that the more you stay in the worse the anxiety gets as there is not much to focus on i have stopped socialising as im afraid of having a panic attack when i am with them no one knows my situation only my fiancée
hope your feeling better soon x
Thanks Clair, it's just so hard isn't it?? But hopefully we will get there!! Xx
yeah it is hard but in sure there will be light at the end of the tunnel for us all :) i cant even think about looking for a job as im to scared in case i have an attack at work i have a 9 year old daughter as well and i just want to get this under control asap as i dont want her to suffer because of me! xx
Are you on any medication, I know a lot of people want to get through this without it but I have found it helpful. Xx
im not on anything at the min ames :( i think my doctor is reluctant to give me anything until i complete CBT therapy which i am on the waiting list for i think i am getting worse and don't know how much longer i can go on with out taking anything to take the edge off the way i am feeling im going to see a different doctor today and im hoping he will start me on some treatment asap im pleased the treatment you are taking is working for you! xx
If you feel you need it, they should give you some. There is nothing wrong with taking them and they do work. They take time though so be prepared for that!! I have not felt the full effect yet. Good for you for going to docs, I can't even do that!! I have to speak to them on the phone!! Xx
Aww bless you i hate going to the docs i will probably have a panic attack in the waiting room and will forget what to say to the doctor but i will try my hardest to get through it i am willing to give anything a try as it cant make me feel any worse than i feel xx
The one thing that keeps me going (and trying) is my past experience... i have done it before and had 6 years of bliss but its back again due to 2 years of stress. it can be beat and I have to remember I did it but I also remember the hard work getting to where I did and this time I have a 2 year old to look after as well x
You will do it, and your 2 year old will spur you on!! We will all beat it, please keep in touch and let me know how your both doing!! Xx
I def am going to beat it... we all are.. positive thoughts and telling myself im ok always helps xxx
Just to update. I went out to town today with the fiancé, spent about 20 - 30 mins looking round charity shops. Then came home for lunch and after that went back out to see our wedding venue (about 20 min drive away) and I chatted to the lady like I was a 'normal' person!! Haha!!
I am not saying that all this wasn't really hard because it was, but I did it!! I am now very tired and going to watch crappy films, I think I deserve it!! Xx
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