Spiraling again

[Anjie]

I feel like my fears are getting hold of me again and I feel so scared but I don t have anyone to talk to :( I've had anxiety and depression issues for years but have always been able to hid them quiet well till I started Uni last year. Since then at times I get to scared to leave my room or go to Uni. My grades are falling. My partner of 5 years dumped me. My best friend here treats my panics like I'm trying to get at him somehow. Which really hurts me as I feel genuinely scared around people at Uni sometimes and he says I just don't try hard enough. Im on citalopram, but I feel it's not working anymore. I was meant to start CBT but it got Pushed back another month which is making me feel worse, because I really want to sort my life out. I want my best friend to stop treating me like all I do is panic to ruin his life :(

Sorry this is a big pointless rant. I just needed somehow to get off my chest

[Ellie-Bear]

Hiya.

I wanted to send you a :bighug1:. What you have written isn't a pointless rant, its how you feel!! This is a great site as we are all in the same boat! Must be so hard for you with your best friend treating you in the way that they are. Have you tried talking to them about how you really feel and that if you could stop this you certainly would. Are you able to go back and see your doctor if you feel the cit. isn't working anymore? How long have you taken it for? Must have been such a pain that your CBT got put back another month, I'm on the waiting list for CBT on the NHS and have been told it could be atleast a 6 month waiting list so have started some online CBT courses.
Just remember you are not alone and you will get better.
Take care of yourself.
Ellie. Xxx

[sarebare]

Hi Anjie,
You are not ranting, just needing someone to listen. It is really hard not having anyone to talk to and that can understand. That's why this site is so great - so many people here who know what it is like to feel the way you do and that can offer support.
I have tried quite a few of the meds and it took me a while to find the one that worked for me, so you should definitely discuss this with your doctor and change what you are taking if it is not right for you. I found that after getting the medication right, I was able to work on my other issues and it made such a difference to my life.
Take care
Sarah