still living at home because of anxiety [Archive]

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mrk74

23-06-11, 12:15

Hi everyone :)

I was just wondering if there is anyone out there who still lives at home with there parents in there 30s or 40s because of there anxiety or depression? Im 37 and still at home and I hate it, I feel like people who know me are saying to themselves WHAT A LOSER he is. I feel my parents are ashamed of me and are just scarred to say it to my face. I wanted to move out years ago but I couldnt afford to do it on my wage and I had to wait until my girlfriend had also paid of a loan so we could afford to do it. Unfortunatly my girlfriend left me for someone else shortly after she finished her loan. My anxiety isnt as bad as it was when I was in my 20s but I just feel like its stopped me doing so many things that most people take for granted. I fear im going to live the rest of my life as a sad loner who lives with his parents. Its really worrying me now and I dont know what to do. :shrug:

neilish

23-06-11, 16:03

I kinda understand how you feel, im 29 and still at home. Mostly due to living with social anxiety and depression. Ive asked my parents in the past how they feel about it, ive told them its not right - people my age should have a partner/wife and be living in there own house! My parents just laugh it off, and tell me that there are millions of familys who live in a similar way. At the end of the day I just look at it in a positive way, you have a roof over your head, food, and a family close by. Makes me kinda depressed when I hear/see people who I went to school with now married with kids! Grr :(

kibbutz83

23-06-11, 20:57

Hi Mrk74, I lived with my parents until i was 30, and it caused a huge rift between my mother and me... a family therapist once said to me that if i didn't force myself to leave, i would probably be stuck there til i was 90 :( Only you can do something about it though... just don't wait too much longer! Life will pass you by :( I'm not sure we can fully mature if we're still living under our parent's roof... take the plunge, get them to evict you :)

Tyke

24-06-11, 20:07

keta

24-06-11, 22:35

Hi mark
At least you have family around you. I m 31 but only renting a place and when my son is not with me its the most lonely time ever . All my family is hundreds miles away. Plus it is much harder to get on property ladder like tyke mentioned. I wouldn't worry to much what other people think of you, who cares in the end.

mrk74

26-06-11, 12:54

Hi Mrk74

More people are living with their parents for longer now just because of house prices and high rents. If it is financially possible, could you rent somewhere close by so you would still have your parents around for a bit of support while you get used to living on your own? As it is obviously very hard for you to do, you need to make any transition as easy and stress free as possible for it to be achievable.

Tyke

Hi Tyke

I cannot afford to rent at the moment as im unemployed and broke, and I was told by the local council that I have no chance of getting a flat on the council as im not a priority. So until I find a job im going to be here for a bit longer:-(

Tyke

26-06-11, 14:26

I cannot afford to rent at the moment as im unemployed and broke, and I was told by the local council that I have no chance of getting a flat on the council as im not a priority. So until I find a job im going to be here for a bit longer:-(
Getting a job must be your first move then. Easier said than done at the moment I know. But if you can get sorted jobwise and have that bit of cash it does give you a lot more options.

Nicky32

26-06-11, 14:54

it's so hard to find a job and stick at it. it just drains me and my anxiety hits the roof. i cant sleep or owt. still need money to live though even at parents house

cas82

28-06-11, 16:13

Hi

I'm 28y old and still live with parents and get no privacy as its a bungelow I have sufferd with major anexiety from 18y old untill 2003 then went into derealization.

Now im constanly spaced out 24/7 like im stuck in a dream and ive become social phobic rarely venture out the house and very depressed.

I do push myself do DIY and odd jobs if I can and we have a treadmill and cross trainer so do the odd excersise really helps lifts my mood but have to be carefull as it makes me extreamly dizzy!

Take care and keep positive!