Not getting out much feel down

[phil06]

I'm feeling a bit down start of the year I was a bit agoraphobic and never wanted to go out. I lost my job in February and enjoyed the rest at first. I got over the agoraphobia with relaxation CDs and going longer walks. I went from ten min walks to half an hour and I try and go uptown shopping once a week.

I've had a few job interviews past few weeks and never got them. My friends have been busy last few months never see them. Im single and last dated when I was just getting over the agoraphobia in March. I'm still quite anxious but feel at a stage where I am ready to get back into social life but it's not happening. I feel it might help me fully recover again.

Ive had about 15 jobs and been to college a few times and once did some volunteering work but don't wanna do that again or join any club. Ideally I'd take another job I fear how I will cope going out frequently again. Some days I don't feel like going out but more days than not now I do want to go out. I managed the cinema about 3 weeks ago too just everybody is busy even family.

Also feel a little isolated getting better but still suffering some days I can't cope well and need to come on here and chat. Is there some light at the end of the tunnel? Tonight I felt no positives square one basically but I know I have made some good changes but I don't want to settle for being stuck in my bedroom too much.

[becksfan86]

Hi Phil, i am so thats how your feeling, i was off for only 3 weeks, rest was good but all i wanted to do was go back to work that was the best thnig for me, i am glad your going for interviews ur making great steps.

Now me, i am not sociable at all really, if i can get out of somethnig i will, there is light at end of the tunnel, i cantr believe im writing that as i wrote i didnt see the light at end of tunnel about a month ago, but my meds are making me feel alot better, i mean dont get me wrong have my bad days but i am alt better.

Take care, hope u feel better soon

Charmaine

[Tyke]

Hi Phil

Well done for getting the interviews anyway. Probably the best thing to do would be to get a little job or something to build your confidence a bit. I don't know what sort of jobs you went for, but if they were full-time could you try getting something part-time or even very part-time just to start you off? Even if it is something that you haven't considered before if you could just get some work to do it would be a start for you. Once you get a routine and a bit of money coming in you will start to feel better.

Tyke

[D_aisy]

I know how ur feeling Phil! Thanks to my anx I too was agraphobic for 5 months last year & the feeling of desperately wanting to go out but then not being able to do it or not having the right person available when u want to go out is so emotionally draining!
I fear at the min with my current circumstances having changed drastically that I am heading that way again.. I've been signed off work because I can't cope with the pressure and stress of a 'normal' day I'm finding that some days I don't want to go out & others I'm desperate but feel resentment toward other people for leading normal lives & not being available to do things with me which I am sure would get me back into the 'social world' again!
Well done on going to the Cinema - I too did it recently for the first time in 3 years and it felt amazing :) I like to sit back at the end of the week and look at the positive things I achieved..going to the shops or just walking up the stairs without getting dizzy or faint and praise myself for the small stuff no matter how insignificant it may seem. With this positive reinforcement I find it much easier to remember that I am allowed to have isolated down days and try to give myself a break and gradually thos coaxes me back out into the world!
Don't be to hard on yourself you sound like you know what you want to do so take that courage and go for it because you can do it!
And with regards to friends / family being busy take control & plan a night out rather than waiting until they are free. I know preplanning can cause some anx but plan for where you feel comfortable going & trust me you'll feel good for having organised it and following it through to the end
x

[Mogwog]

Hi Phil

You sound like you've done really well, you've gone for longer walks etc which is amazing. Just stepping out of the house is amazing.

You've done it in the past, you can do it again. Just focus on the positives - all the things you have achieved.

L.x