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red.sabrina
07-07-11, 00:03
hi.. I have just found this sight, because i have been googling my symptoms and brain tumours. to be honest i dont know whats going on with me...im a 44 year old female, clinically depressed for years, so take anti depressants, take propanalol for anxiety and quetiapin for god knows what. I think my problems are down to not having a happy childhood, having a horrible teenage life, being thrown out at 18 and having to cope...but I was strong and did. got into the wrong relationship which was abusive mentally and physically, and took me 15 years to get out of. I have two sons, one 20 and one 13 who are both Aspergers and ADHD - so are a challenge, and hard work. in the past few weeks i have noticed my memory going and that i am saying stupid things. even my family have noticed. yesterday i woke in the early hours with a bad head, and ached all over, deep into my bones, and my skin was sore to touch. Felt exhausted and tearful. Stayed most of the day in bed, slept alot, felt sorry for myself alot....not much of an appetite, in fact felt nauseous. today, when i woke, i had tingling sensations at the top of my neck and in my face. i took my dog for a walk...managed about a 1/3 of what i usually do and then gave up as my legs felt so heavy, and kept feeling i was going to fall over...walked really slowly and just felt like falling to the floor and laying there. i didnt, ..i walked slowly home and arrived home, exhausted, out of breath, and tearful because i realised how useless i am this week. got the washing out of the tumbler to put away, and noticed it didnt smell fresh - looks like i only tumble dried the washing, but never actually washed it. i am so forgetful and stupid, it just isnt funny anymore. i am typing this in bed, with this prickly sensation down my face and in the back of my neck. oh, yes, i also have a disgusting boil type thing by my mouth, i suppose yet another thing i should put down to stress. why arent i strong enough to sort myself out and stop feeling this way. i should be able to enjoy the life i now have...please....will i ever get through this, or will i remain useless forever ;(

diane07
07-07-11, 00:05
Hi red.sabrina

We just wanted to welcome you aboard to NMP. We hope you enjoy your stay here and get all the support and advice you need.

Please take some time to read the website articles on the left as well for loads of advice and tips.

eeyorelover
07-07-11, 00:34
Hi and welcome to the site!

Have you spoken to your doctor? Perhaps you need to either change meds or up your dose?
You are definitely not useless although I know that feeling as bad as you do right now can make you feel that way!
You are also definitely not stupid! I have said things during a bad anxiety patch and immediately thought to myself how dumb it was and then of course I had to think on it, rethink on it, spin it round and think on it some more! LOL
None of your symptoms make you a bad person or a failure!
We all do the best we can and we have to accept the fact that we can't be everything to everyone all the time! No one can!
I hope you feel better soon and I hope that reading other member's posts here will at least help you to know you are not alone in the way you are feeling!

(((HUGS)))
xxx
Sandy