ted151
09-07-11, 17:05
Hi everyone!
I have been diagnosed with anxiety which has led to major depression. I have been living with this disease for ages but unfortunately picked up too late.
My MAIN issue: Whenever I try to concentrate on reading,listening or watching something which can increase my knowledge(like reading newspaper, listening to the news, reading office e-mails), I start yawning very loudly. This saps all my energy and basically drains me of all my energy. I get water in my eyes and need to lie down to rest to recover. After a few minutes(10-15) of rest, I get normal again but this keeps on happening again and again. I am deeply frustrated and annoyed at this repeated occurrence. I shudder to read the newspaper or listen to the news as I believe this can set off what I have described just above. I am a post graduate in science and an MBA. This started happening during the second trimester of my MBA. As in MBA, we know that you have to give a lot of presentations and public speeches and be part of many projects. I was pathetic in all these activities and did not contribute to any group project or presentation. I don't have many friends. In fact I've just one and he now has moved away. The only support that I have is my parents. i have a brother but he is in the States and is working. I have just joined a very good company but unfortunately could not contribute enough during the first month. Its is a sales job where I have to go and meet people and tell them about our products and make sales numbers happen every month. I believe I am not good in communicating with people and this job is all about communication. The reason that I took this job is that it allows me flexibility where I don't have to go to office everyday and interact with other colleagues. Its not that I don't want to interact, i am dying to make friends(mix up with people) but I haven't been able to do that since school. i didn't make a single friend in school. in fact, i was an irate kid who use to lose temper very easily and was very tense and studious and good in studies. But gradually as i have approached higher classes, my grades have gone down and my confidence has taken a beating. My confidence, self-esteem is shattered and I don't really think in a positive way about myself. I want to do my job but there is no excitement within me to do it, its just because I have to do it that I am doing it. But its a very simple job as far as job content is concerned. Because typically MBA's expected to give analysis, projections of data using complex algorithms, data analysis tools: The sort of thing I struggled with IMMENSELY during my MBA.
MEDICATION: As I said I was first diagnosed with this disease during my MBA(2 & 1/2 years ago). During that time I did not know much about the disease and whenever an anti-depressant(AD) was prescribed to me, i took it for a week and left it because of the side-effects. Since then almost 2 years, I ignored this disease and did not take any medication. I went on a holiday abroad and was fine and then worked for a while away from home for almost a year. Now i have changed jobs(the previous job was also a sales job in a different company) and been at home for almost 4 months. During these months my condition has severely worsened. I cannot read the newspaper or listen to the news as I could earlier. But i have noticed a conspicuous change in my condition since coming home, it has worsened significantly. i have been on ADs for almost 3 & 1/2 months now but nothing has worked.
Month April: Venlafaxine (Effexor) for 3 weeks then left it.
From 30th April till present : Bupropion (Wellbutrin SR)-300mg/day
From 9th June till present : Escitalopram (Beginning with 10mg and steadily increasing(2.5mg at regular intervals) to now 15mg/day.
Nothing has worked till now and my condition has exacerbated. i am anxious about losing my job. I can't interact with people freely and cannot make FRIENDS. I need urgent help and advise to get my life back on track.
Regards,
Ted
I have been diagnosed with anxiety which has led to major depression. I have been living with this disease for ages but unfortunately picked up too late.
My MAIN issue: Whenever I try to concentrate on reading,listening or watching something which can increase my knowledge(like reading newspaper, listening to the news, reading office e-mails), I start yawning very loudly. This saps all my energy and basically drains me of all my energy. I get water in my eyes and need to lie down to rest to recover. After a few minutes(10-15) of rest, I get normal again but this keeps on happening again and again. I am deeply frustrated and annoyed at this repeated occurrence. I shudder to read the newspaper or listen to the news as I believe this can set off what I have described just above. I am a post graduate in science and an MBA. This started happening during the second trimester of my MBA. As in MBA, we know that you have to give a lot of presentations and public speeches and be part of many projects. I was pathetic in all these activities and did not contribute to any group project or presentation. I don't have many friends. In fact I've just one and he now has moved away. The only support that I have is my parents. i have a brother but he is in the States and is working. I have just joined a very good company but unfortunately could not contribute enough during the first month. Its is a sales job where I have to go and meet people and tell them about our products and make sales numbers happen every month. I believe I am not good in communicating with people and this job is all about communication. The reason that I took this job is that it allows me flexibility where I don't have to go to office everyday and interact with other colleagues. Its not that I don't want to interact, i am dying to make friends(mix up with people) but I haven't been able to do that since school. i didn't make a single friend in school. in fact, i was an irate kid who use to lose temper very easily and was very tense and studious and good in studies. But gradually as i have approached higher classes, my grades have gone down and my confidence has taken a beating. My confidence, self-esteem is shattered and I don't really think in a positive way about myself. I want to do my job but there is no excitement within me to do it, its just because I have to do it that I am doing it. But its a very simple job as far as job content is concerned. Because typically MBA's expected to give analysis, projections of data using complex algorithms, data analysis tools: The sort of thing I struggled with IMMENSELY during my MBA.
MEDICATION: As I said I was first diagnosed with this disease during my MBA(2 & 1/2 years ago). During that time I did not know much about the disease and whenever an anti-depressant(AD) was prescribed to me, i took it for a week and left it because of the side-effects. Since then almost 2 years, I ignored this disease and did not take any medication. I went on a holiday abroad and was fine and then worked for a while away from home for almost a year. Now i have changed jobs(the previous job was also a sales job in a different company) and been at home for almost 4 months. During these months my condition has severely worsened. I cannot read the newspaper or listen to the news as I could earlier. But i have noticed a conspicuous change in my condition since coming home, it has worsened significantly. i have been on ADs for almost 3 & 1/2 months now but nothing has worked.
Month April: Venlafaxine (Effexor) for 3 weeks then left it.
From 30th April till present : Bupropion (Wellbutrin SR)-300mg/day
From 9th June till present : Escitalopram (Beginning with 10mg and steadily increasing(2.5mg at regular intervals) to now 15mg/day.
Nothing has worked till now and my condition has exacerbated. i am anxious about losing my job. I can't interact with people freely and cannot make FRIENDS. I need urgent help and advise to get my life back on track.
Regards,
Ted