Haircuts!

[brambles]

I'm long overdue for a haircut. I leave it until I look ridiculous, like I'm wearing a toupee from a joke shop.

I'm reasonably ok at dentist or optician appointments (haven't been to the doctors in 8 years) because I only have to say the usual pleasantries; "hello", "goodbye", "yes please" and "no thank you", but anywhere it’s expected of me to make light conversation, like hairdressers/barbers I loathe.

It's because they're so informal, and the first thing they always say is the customary "are you going out tonight?", then “did you see the game?“ How do you answer? I can't get past "No." My brain says the remaining of the sentence but my mouth can't. For me haircuts are 15 minutes of excruciating embarrassment which I'm desperate to escape from. When the hairdresser finally holds up the mirror, the signal of immanent deliverance, I say it's fine (even though I'm extremely short sighted without my glasses) she could have shaved a Swastika into my head and I would still say it's ok, just to get out. Then my coat’s on and I’m holding out the money before she’s even put down her scissors!

Anyone else like this or is it just me?

Jeff

[mrk74]

Hi Brambles

Thats me in a nutshell really. I cannot stand the barber shop. I hate having to wait for my turn and just look at the floor because im so anxious of people looking at me. Then when I get to have my hair cut im a sweaty anxious wreck! Its got so bad that ive bought myself a hair clipper and I cut my own hair now. I do go to have my hair cut ocasionally but only when im feeling good.

[Hope38]

I hate spending time in the hairdressers. Thankfully my hairdresser knows how difficult it is to be there so makes conversation when I want to and isnt offended when I bury myself in a book and just let her get on with it. What about getting a hairdresser to come to you? or would this be too difficult?

[vix73]

Hey guys,
I worked as a hairdresser for over 20 years before deciding a change was needed,i am now a jewellery agent. Were not all the same, honest! lol Personally i would know when a client was nervous and really kept the conversation to the mimimum without seeming like i was being rude. You can usually tell which clients just come in for a good gossip and the ones that just want a haircut and to get out asap! Unfortunatly some hairdressers don't pick up on this and will just babble about anything and everything!
Vix:)

[LauraSmith27]

I hate hairdressers too. Haven't been for five months now! I don't mind the conversation, it's just the fact that I can't escape once I'm in the chair. I start feeling really hemmed in and claustrophobic because I know I can't leave - it's not like I can run out of the shop with my hair half done!

[Heather23]

Bless you all, im exactly the same. Two of my worse things at once are making conversation with a stranger whilst looking at myself in a mirror. Not great at all! I think its so hard too as I find it hard too look at myself when theres loads of pretty hairdressers in the background and I end up comparing myself to them!

Im sorry I have no advice, Just wanted to say your not alone. Take care all of you xx

[brambles]

Hi everyone thanks for the replies.

I can't cut my own hair because my hand/eye coordination is terrible when looking into a mirror. I don't do it much so I'm not used to it. I go for the cheap haircuts (£5.00 ish) as I really don't care enough about making myself look nice, so getting a haircut at home would be wayyy past my budget. Sorry to be naive but I didn't know barbers visited homes?

The places I go to usually employ young kids who generally don't have the experience and wisdom of older people so can't recognise when someone is uncomfortable or "shy". f you wear glasses like me then take them off (have to anyway?) and then you can't see yourself in the mirror, or anyone else around. Simples! Unfortunately I'm then at the mercy of the barber until the've finished so they really could do anything and I wouldn't know until it would be too late!

Jeff

[Tyke]

I'm exactly the same Jeff. There are a few mobile hairdressers around these days, I don't think it would be too much of a problem finding one unless you live out in the sticks. Personally, I just try out different ones in town until I find one I like. As Vix says, most hairdressers will pick up in the fact that you aren't really a talker and keep things to a minimum. I think I would find someone coming to the house just as stressful if not more so, as you would be tied down to an appointment and you could still have the small talk to contend with.

At the end of the day you are paying for a service and the hairdresser wants you to come back, so they usually try to do what you want. I find it easier if it is a lady cutting as they are tend to be better at picking up on exactly what you want and don't rope you into a conversation about the footy when you aren't interested. There are plenty of ladies cutting mens hair these days. Another one I like to go to is run by some Asian men who don't speak great English, so they don't try the small talk and their customer care is excellent.

Best of luck with finding somewhere suitable! Perhaps we should produce a guide book with a little symbol to show 'anxiety friendly' salon? Maybe a little drawing of a nervous looking person stuck in the chair but smiling or something :unsure::):D.

Tyke

[Klonoa]

Ohhhh I hate going to the hairdressers. I recently (well, a few months ago) went for the first time in 4 years lol

I haaaate it, people all up in your personal space, I don't like people I don't know touching me. I'm a reclusive artist who likes computer games and the occasional anime convention - I have zero in common with the ladies who cut hair. I hate reality tv, I don't care much for celebrities, picky about movies...just makes the whole thing really awkward.

Not to tar all hairdressers with the same brush (shh I know its bad!), but where I live now women care an awful lot about their appearance, their nails done all nice, all pretty and skinny. I really don't care about any of that and it's the only place where I really care that people are judging me when I walk through the door. The whole thing is just uncomfortable.

[evil monkey]

ah good call thanks for this. Same...happened last time. Went in on a weekday, tuesday, to avoid weekend rabble, and minimize the 'how was your weekend' 'doing anything this weekend' type stuff. no. im not. im doing ef all :\. and got the inevitable (friendly) "you on a day off then?". er. no.

went in on the bike, cuz the idea being, if i'm revd up from cycling in, its easier to 'relax' in there than if i just drove in.

[Klonoa]

I suppose you could always lie! Make up something "not my day off, my shift starts late today" or whatever :)

[terror-x]

i hate my hair with a passion when i let it grow it really does go out of controle and my hair grows outwards so i look like a beegee .

allways have that fear of the stylelist takeing my ear of tho or cutting me

[Jimgym]

Could you try a different hairdressers? Personally, I go to a barbers in town where I know that I can have a chat about guy topics. I've had my hair cut in unisex places a few times and I can't deal with chatty female hairdressers (Sorry!)!

Like EvilMonkey said, exercise is always a good one to help you relaxed when you're in the chair.

[brambles]

I usually go to a barbers, but it doesn't help because the guy topics they want to talk about usually involve football, which I have no interest in (I'm not a very sporty person)

Anyway, it's coming up to the time when I should have a hair cut, but I think I'll leave it for at least another month!


allways have that fear of the stylelist takeing my ear of tho or cutting me My ear quite badly cut by a hairdresser when I was 5 or 6. Got a free lollypop though!

Jeff