Male therapist?

[haziefantasie]

Hi everyone

Ive been doing cbt over the phone for a couple of weeks, & although I think its helping Ive realised I really need some sort of therapy where I can talk about my past, how it has affected me & how I can deal with it.

So I asked if I can have some one to one counselling aswell, & theyve just rang me & booked a session on friday.

Im over the moon that I can do both, plus the fact that its all free. The only concern I have is that its with a male therapist (Im female btw), & I find it really difficult to open up to men. Ive just ended an abusive relationship which I really need to deal with, & I believe most of my issues are due to my relationships with men & also with my parents (especially my dad). I just dont know if Ill feel comfortable enough talking to a man about my problems - my cbt therapist is also male & I dont open up to him as much as I probably should. I dont know whether to tell them Id rather see a woman, but then Id probably have to wait a while. Or shall I just give it a try & see how it goes? Has anyone else been in this position? x

[Anna C]

Hi,

I waited 8 months and then received a letter to see a male counsellor, which I didn't feel comfortable about, I have had CBT twice and both times the therapists were women.

Also I don't drive and the surgery wasn't local, so although I felt at the time that I really needed help I rang up to cancel the male counsellor, the lady I spoke to was very understanding. Then I thought I would wait for months, but I received an appointment to see a lady counsellor two weeks later.

In my surgery you only get 6-8 sessions or at the very most 12, so to get the most out of counselling the sooner you can trust and open up to the counsellor the better. Like you said you could give it a try you might get on with him really well and if you didn't think it was working after a few weeks you could ask to see a lady counsellor.

Take care
Anna

[haziefantasie]

Hi Anna

Thank you for your reply :hugs:

Yes youre right, it is important to feel comfortable with a therapist no matter what theyre sex is. Im going to go along & see how I feel, if it doesnt feel right Ill ask to change x

[jo61]

Having had a few female therapists, I've been seeing a man for the past two years. He's been the best ever and has given me a very fresh perspective. I agree you go and see him and if you don't get on then ask to see a lady. Good luck

[haziefantasie]

Thanks Jo for your reply.

I had my first session on friday & it went really well. I took my mums advice & tried to see him as just a person rather than a man if that makes sense, & it seemed to work. He seemed knowledgeable about domestic abuse aswell which is the main issue Im dealing with at the moment so thats a relief. Hopefully this is what I need to help me on my road to recovery x

[Anxious_gal]

You mum has some good advice, thinking about it could be good to see a make therapist if he's good at his job and all that , it might be nice to have a man acknowledge your feelings and pain, like philonena says it could be good getting some insight from a man.