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Orion510
05-04-04, 06:19
My sister is graduating from collage in may. My parents an my grandparent are all going to Maryland to see her(I'm in NY). They will be gone for 3 days.

The problem is that I get anxiety traveling far from home, so I decided to stay at home. But I also have anxity when I am alone. I could stay with someone but I am uncomfortable anywhere but home. I am trying to decided the lesser of two evils, stay home or go to Maryland.

I need some advice on preparation for the day. I already stay home during the day for a few hours but that is a lot different that being home while everyone is in another state.

What do I need to do?

kate
05-04-04, 09:04
Hiya Orion,

Hmm difficult to know which decision to make, isn't it?

As you get anxious in both situations, I myself would say you may be better to go with your family to Maryland.

At least you would then have the support of your family should you become over anxious.

You would then also be able to see your sister graduating.

Just my own opinion of course. At the end of the day you must do what you feel is best.

Take care and let us know how you go

Kate x

sarah
05-04-04, 09:11
Hiya Orion

Yep I agree with Kate but if youve made up your mind not to go I can totally understand (I was unable to be left alone for about 4 weeks at the beginning even to the stage of making my mum come and stay with me the night when my hubby went away!!!)

A couple of things you can do:-

Make sure youve got everything you need before they go away so you dont worry about things.

Get some things to distract yourself...good book, DVD, jigsaw puzzle, computer game..whatever you like.

Find a project to do..do you want to redecorate your room?

Do some housework or gardening

Make sure you eat well so you dont feel dizzy from hunger

Failing all that, take a few naps and sleep the time away..then you wont notice you are alone!!!

love Sarah
xx

Brownie
05-04-04, 22:11
Hi Orion,

I know how you feel, I cant bear staying home alone anymore and i use to love it ( go figure lol ) I would say go, try getting away for a bit it may help you. And i live 10 minutes from NY Maryland isnt far at all. But that all depends on you. I know i dont like to be too far from home but then again i dont like to be alone either so i dont know what to say but i know how you feel and i dont even know what i wold do if i were you. But hey its worth a try going! and its probly only for a couple of days right??
please post back and tell us what your doing.

-Christie[:I]

lilac kitten
09-04-04, 22:19
Hi Orion,

I've sat here putting myself in your situation, and me I'd stay at home - easy option to avoid the travelling. But I remember a few years ago now my then boyfriend was having his passing out parade in the Army town of Catterick (up north in England), and we live in Hampshire (well down south) its about a five hour journey. And it was really important to him that I went. I was terrified and to make matters worse was travelling up with his mum, dad and granny - so no one I knew very well. Still I did it and enjoyed it funnily enough, but thats young love for you.

Putting all your worries and anxieties to one side - would you really like to go to the graduation? If the answer is yes, but only your nerves that are stopping you then try talking to the other family members you're going with - explain your anxieties and say you really want to go, and really need their support to get through it. I can't say if I'd be that brave in your position, but I'd like to think that I'd at least try and consider it.

Really good luck and let us know which you decide.

Ruth
x

red
10-04-04, 13:07
Hi Orion

Only you can decide this. However, if you read some of the advice and stories that people have posted, you may see lots of them have said - 'Oh sod it, I'm going to do it anyway' - or as Meg says 'Just do it'. The anticipation and indecisiveness is often more painful than the event.

Good luck with your choice!

Red
x

stimpy
13-04-04, 12:05
Hi Orion

If you decide to stay home, plan your time.
Gardening, cleaning, watching tv, video or Dvd, listening to relaxation music, or colouring in and drawing are great things to do and keep you busy.
Don't forget to use your imagination, even if everyone is out, tell yourself. "I'm not alone, because someone is - in the bathroom, kitchen, garden, bedroom, at a neighbours ..."
When Steve first went back to work, I told myself he wasn't really out he was just in another room.
Then I decided, great! Everyone is out, I'm going to use the computer in peace, watch tv without someone getting in the way or talking while I'm watching my favourite film.
I can listen to my relaxation music and have a sleep without being bothered.

If you do decide to go, make yourself a panic and distraction kit, that way you have all you need incase the worst comes to the worst. Red is right, the anticipation can often be worse than the doing.

Good Luck !

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx
With hard work and determination and all the things you know.
The world is there for you to take. There's nowhere you can't go.


[:p]Scatty Eccentric & 'Poet Laureate to panic and anxiety'