Hi i've just joined.

[bevwilks]

Hi Guys and Girls, i have just joined this forum and i am totally useless at working them. once i have posted a post i can never find them again... Abit about me.. My names bev and i am from manchester, i have suffered with anxiety and panic for the last 12 months or so, it begun (i think) when my mother in law dropped dead in front of me. It hit me like a tun of bricks i didn't understand what was happening to me. I was having numerous attacks a day and felt very uneasy and tense and anxious. I became very dependant on my husband and wouldn't leave the house on my own, once an attack started i would fidget with my hands wander about not knowing what i was doing. i began been sick and going to the loo at lot sweating shaking hyperventalating. I'd hide away in bed and cry for hours on end my body would shake from head to toe. This went on for quite a while, i even started going to work with my husband everyday. i wouldn't leave his side. Eventually i went to see my doctor whom eventually gave me some medication to try and help control it which thank god it did and still does. Things came increasing bad for me i wanted to take my own life i think the only reason i didn't was the sake of my children. i do still believe to this day if i didn't have them i wouldn't be here now. I have however come along way since last year, i am back at work myself and now find it much easier to go out shopping on my own.I have also just started cbt which i had to wait 8 months for?? I'm finding it helpfull but i do find it difficult to put the words into practice. My one fear now since my anxiety started is my husband going out on his own. I don't mind been in the house in the day on my own but night time is a different matter. Our trouble is he became my saftey blanket and we now need to deal with this. Things as i say are getting much better but it has been a long hard road which still has a few bumps in. specially at the time of the month... HELP.. I'm stil taking my medications but hopefully will come off them soon and be myself once more. Who myself is though i don't relly know...... It would be lovely to talk to other suffers like me.

[diane07]

Hi bevwilks

We just wanted to welcome you aboard to NMP. We hope you enjoy your stay here and get all the support and advice you need.

Please take some time to read the website articles on the left as well for loads of advice and tips.

[bevwilks]

Hi Thanks Diane for the Welcome, i'm just trying to find my way round at the moment.

[paula lynne]

Hi Bev and a big warm welcome to you. x Bless you, youve been through a right rough time. Never fear, we are all one big family here and will do our best to support you all the way. So glad you found us! :welcome:

[bevwilks]

Hi Paula Thanks for the welcome. i have had a rough time but thankfully come out the other end, there is light at the end of the tunnel. i am still finding it difficult at times but i have more good days than bad now. can you tell me how you suffer please...

[paula lynne]

I have had agoraphobia, panic attacks and anxiety for 11 years.:doh:Feeling much better these days and am glad to be able to come here to help support others. Im an ex-nurse, mother of 2, nana to 1, live in Wales, married......and make soaps for the NMP shop (shameless plug!)......also work from home as a florist. life is pretty good these days. Keep posting, youll find lots of people who will be here for you, night and day. In 5 days, you can access the chat room if you fancy that (too fast for me). Nice to meet you.x.

[bevwilks]

Your not to far from me then, how have you dealt with your anxiety? what symptoms do or did you get. what was your best method for dealing with it...

[terror-x]

welcome to the forum here we help each other so please feel comfortable here :)

[paula lynne]

I decided that I was too young to feel that old, sitting in a chair all day at 38 fearing everything, afraid of everything, and everyone. I decided I had to stop being afraid and start trying......
I got some tapes by Susan Jeffers called "Feel the fear and do it anyway"
I still listen to them now...she talks about moving out of your comfort zone and I cant recommend her enough. I prefer the tape/cd to the book.

I began sitting outside in the garden, longer everyday. I learnt to accept my body sensations and weird feelings....knowing they couldnt really hurt me. I made my hubby take me to the supermarket and leave me there (that was REALLY hard and took months of practice)....I learned how to control my breathing with a paper bag, I read and re-read the info in the left hand column on this forum about what happens during anxiety.....I began to step out of my comfort zone.....its been a hard 18 months, and I still get times when Im so dizzy and tingly (before a period), but Im kind to myself and accept my limitations.

I use aromatherapy a lot, and have recently changed my diet, I feel good, energy is back. My hubby was my rock..hes had to see me loose my career, completely depend on him (and Im talking wiping up the vomit and diahorrea after a panic attack), crying non stop and lying on the sofa for days.....I realised I couldnt do it too him and needed to step up myself....so I did. I still get the odd attack, but Im so in control, hes downstairs, and I just take myself off upstairs til its over.....

Im going out dancing this weekend! Ive booked my holiday camping in 3 weeks, and Im fine 80% of the time. The times when its bad, I dont fight it. You cant fight something you cant see. Acceptance is the key to taking back your life. You need to get to a point where you can go about your day with all the nasty anxiety symptoms and still have a reasonably good day. :)

[bevwilks]

oh my lord, well done you and good luck for the future. i have just made a note of the tape your talking about, i am going to do a search tomorrow and see if i can find it somewhere and try it out. it's great to talk to you knowing you have suffered like i have. i'm good with going out shopping now and i'm also back at work but find it very difficult if my husband wants to go out alone. This weekend i'm going to do as you did and see how i get on.. Aromatherapy? what is that i have heard of it but notsure what it is or what you do? My husband like yours is also my rock but i think to much so. wow it's so great to talk to some one like me. i'm not the only one out there. i hope you have a super weekend dancing and fully enjoy your camping trip..

[bevwilks]

Hello Terror thanks for the welcome..

[paula lynne]

I use oils like lavender on my wrist, and mixed with olive oil for the bath/massage. They really help me when I feel panicky.
Heres why.....
You can trick your brain into becoming calm.
Get a bottle of pure Lavender oil (about £3-£4 for a good one)
When you feel CALM...lie on the bed and either sniff from the bottle, or put a few drops in your hands and rub your hands together to warm the oil.
Now, take a few breathes, not too deep, breath normally. Breath in then as norm for a minute, now repeat with the lavender.
THIS is important, as you breath in the smell, repeat in your mind or out loud "I am SAFE and I am LOVED"....picture your happiest moments in your life.........the associating with the smell and the happy/warm/calm feelings are the KEY. Physically SMILE as you remember these happy times and feeling safe and loved.
Do this for a good half hour, as often as you can, but ONLY when youre calm ok love.

Next time you get those anxiety panic sensations, get out your lavender, put some in your palm and warm it up, breathe in as before, and repeat to yourself in your mind or out loud "I am loved, I am safe".....really concentrate on the happy calm feeling.....it really helps me. It can bring me out of panic in 5 minutes! Some find Lavender a bit overpowering, Neroli oil works just as well although is more expensive.

You brain immediately associates the smell with feelings of calm, and can stop a panic from becoming out of control.

You can learn to do this in a week, but you have to repeat it often for the brain to strongly make the link with the smell and the calm feelings.:)

[bevwilks]

wow thats brilliant, where do you learn this? is it in that book you were talking about?. i can go back to this chat and get the info again can,t i... many many thanks paula. i'm off to bed now hopefully chat to you tomorrow. x x

[paula lynne]

I taught myself Bev. I realised that smelling stuff could take me back years, or to times and places......and I made the connection to smell then really. Next time you want to get back on this thread, go to "all your threads" and it will come up. Nice talking to you, take care x