Flying on Tuesday and can't stop the panic attacks happening :(

[GirlAfraid23]

Hello Everyone,

I am on here today as I am worrying myself stupid about a holiday I have booked this Tuesday - I am scared to death about the flight and although I have flown last year and have a few times before in my life without problems, I am extremely scared. Last year when I got onto teh plane, I was crying, screaming and hysterical. My partner had to literally drag me onto the plane and he was so embarrased of my behaviour. I actually feel as though I'm going to my death and say goodbye in tears to my family, dog and friends before I leave as though I will never see them again.

Take off is the worst and last year I was nearly sick. Throughout the entire flight I was shaking and couldnt wait to get off. I have been torturing myself by looking up accidents in the UK via air travel and each time I read a story I am shaken up even more. Could somebody please tell me the statistics for flying and how safe it is?

[lior]

I don't know the exact statistics, but you are more likely to die crossing the road than in a plane. Much more likely. And crossing a road is something you do every day and you haven't died yet! In fact hardly anyone dies from these kind of accidents.

The likelihood you'd die in a plane is so so small, it's not worth bothering thinking about. Don't let your fear get the better of you.

I found that a good way to deal with this kind of fear is distraction, or sleep if it's possible. Get on the plane as early as you can, imagine it's just a funny shaped bedroom, put some headphones with relaxing music and go to sleep. Even if you can't quite fall asleep, you'll be much more relaxed so the fear won't get you. Otherwise play some sort of game with your partner, a word game or something, that doesn't involve guessing but is quite quick-fire so your attention is held by something else.

You'll be fine :) have a great time on holiday!

[Col]

Girl afraid
Hi I'm really worried for you although I don't know you BUT also I'm a bit miffed!!!!!
I'm naturally positive, ambitious and hard working but beginning of year had to leave my teaching career as I got so I'll and then panic attacs just arrived in my life out of no where. So I would normally say as I try and tell myself no matter how bad your feeling try and push yourself to do something BUT getting on a plane , I don't mean to be awful but personally, well put it this way there's no words that can describe how I'd be on that airplane, I'd be in a right state. Not about it crashing just being on a cramped airplane for a few hours feet off the ground I'd be the way you described yourself to be last year.
I know it's booked but if you feel as bad as you do at the moment you probably really shouldn't be flying, all you'll end up doing is stressing about coming home once your there. I mean it's great your off on your travels but I think from the way you sound at the moment it really isn't a good idea. Don't look at the stats, apparently there's more chance of being involved in a car accident than an aircraft one. But don't look at the stats, do some serious relaxation before you go and get some bachs herbal drops from boots, my mum as always been petrified of flying and those drops really helped.
Good luck

[blueangel]

I'm really not keen on flying either - I know that the aeronautical industry is one of the safest in the world, but that doesn't really help much.

I've tried to analyse why it bothers me, and for me it's two quite specific things

- I don't like the feeling of being trapped and not being able to get out (while I have to trust someone else to fly the plane)

- fear of terrorism, which has definitely been worse since 9/11

When I have flown, I've liked what you can see from above, as being above the clouds is great, but I'm definitely one of the people that thinks that if we were meant to fly, we'd have wings! :D

[nomorepanic]

I admire you for doing it but why did you book it if you knew it would be traumatic for you?

I hate flying so I just don't do it anymore cos I find it too stressful as well.

There is no point giving you statistics cos you will just think that you are one of the unlucky ones.

[nomorepanic]

Try this site as well

http://www.flyingwithoutfear.com/

[lior]

Girl afraid - I really disagree with people who say you shouldn't fly if you're afraid of it. You've got to face your fears! Not dealing with it will make the problem worse.

Once you've got off the plane at your holiday destination, you'll think 'it hasn't crashed, and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be'. You'll have just had a good experience of flying, so coming home will be much easier.

A problem like this is worth dealing with, if it gives you the life-enriching experience of going abroad!

You can do it!

[nomorepanic]

I totally agree with Lior about facing the fears but you should maybe have gone on one of those "flying with confidence" courses first. I have been on it 3 times and it is very very good.

At least that way you are with similar people who are terrified too.

Don't let it ruin your holiday though

[joans60]

Hi there I have just read your post
I also dont like flying but I do it
I have only just come back from Lanzarote and yes I was frightened but I did do it I took my cd player with me and put on some relaxation music and I also had my rescue remedy with me and some Kalms Lozengers The doctor had given me Diazapam but I did not use them
You will be fine do some deep breathing and try and relax and you will do it

Good Luck let us know home you get on.



Joanx

[anxiousinsg]

Hi there, I have a fear flying as well and for years, I would suffer the anxiety and paralysing fear. I had to travel for work and I also travel a fair bit for leisure. It was ridiculous though because I love to travel but weeks before my holiday, I would worry about the flying, and half-way through my holiday, I would worry about my flight back. But I used to just go through with the flight and spend the whole time in a hyper-alert state. It was not pleasant.

Last year, I had had enough so I went to my GP and explained my anxiety. He prescribed me some pills to help me relax and let me tell you, that was one of the best decisions I've ever made. It's mild so all it does is take away the anxiety, it doesn't really make me sleep. I still feel a bit nervous sometimes but nowhere close to the paralysing fear of before. So I suggest you talk to your GP about this as well and ask for something to fight the anxiety. Hope this helps.

Sorry, just realised you were asking about stats. Please, do yourself a favour and don't look for those. You're trying to rationalise the whole thing and honestly, anxiety isn't about being rational. We know that facts and figures support air travel as being very very safe, and it is. But getting anxious is not about being rational, so I feel you'll be better off trying to cope with the anxiety, either with relaxation techniques or with some mild pills.

[Saffron_Shadow]

Hi GirlAfraid :) I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone, I have a complete phobia about flying. Despite the fact that I know it is extremely safe and millions of people do it regularly and so on and so forth, it never shakes the feeling for me that...well I could be that unlucky minority! But that's a phobia for you, completely irrational! :blush:

I have been completely hysterical when going onto a plane, at my worst I pretty much refused to go in the plane door and my boyfriend basically dragged me on (It was only a one hour flight as well!). And you know what? I'm glad he did. Deciding not to fly because you're too scared is letting the fear win in my opinion. Okay, you may have a panic attack when in the air (and yes, I've done that as well) or feel like you're going to be sick but if you have someone you trust with you, get them to talk you through it. Explain to them before you fly what you need. My boyfriend knows what to do with me to get me to get a little bit of a grip of myself and I will generally calm down after a while. Do you really want to miss out on seeing the world (and some blimmin' sunshine!) because of this phobia? I decided that I didn't so I get on with it, however hysterical and irrational I might get.

Take-off is the worst for me too, I can't stand it. I have improved in the sense that I can now get on the plane, sit down get prepared for take-off quite calmly but as soon as the engine starts making loud noises and starts tanking it down the runway I immediately lose control and start panicking. The best advice I can give is distract yourself. I know it sounds weird, but wiggling your toes can help! It requires more concentration than you would expect :D I sook on a sweetie as we're taking off, and do it obsessively until we get up in the air and the crew starts walking about. My boyfriend sits and reassures me, telling me if there was a problem then they wouldn't be getting the trolleys out and trying to sell me stuff! And so on and so forth. You just need to find what works for you. Maybe reading a magazine or doing a wordsearch as the plane is taking off might help? Just gives you something else to focus on!

Good luck for Tuesday, and let us know how you get on!

PS. Sorry my first ever post and I've went on for ages haha, I feel quite strongly about this!

[Saffron_Shadow]

Oh and one more thing - you were asking about statistics. Don't do that to yourself. And try not to read stories in the newspapers as they do exaggerate things quite a lot. For example a couple of years ago the Scotland football team were going abroad for a game and just as the plane was about to land, it took off again before it hit the ground did a circle and then landed. This is something completely normal, and pilots are experts at that sort of thing but the papers made it sounds as if it was a completely dangerous situation when, in reality, it was absolutely nothing of the sort, just quite scary for the people on board obviously.

The pilots know what they're doing, you have to trust them. And remember they want to get there safely as well, and they will do absolutely everything in their power to make sure you do! Flying is safe, it's just that most of us don't understand how it works, and that makes it scary.

[lior]

how were you, Girl Afraid??

[lele19]

I'm terrified of flying but I read Fly without fear and it helped me understand what the hell the plane is doing throughout al of them scary twists and turns, take off is bad for me too, i tense my whole body. Here's the book I have...http://www.amazon.co.uk/Without-Fear-Captain-Keith-Godfrey/dp/1849531102/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1311779162&sr=8-1 hope this helps!! good luckx