Random depression

[lizzie29]

Recently I was starting to beat my anxiety and really challenge all those negative thoughts. I felt really positive and that I could do it.

Two weeks ago though, I woke up and felt the worst I've ever felt - not anxious, but really, really low. I spent 3 days crying for hours and sleeping during the times when I wasn't crying. I took the week off work and felt a little better by the end of the week, but still very sad inside, almost like it hurt.

I went to the doctor's on Monday and he said it sounds like depression, but to give it another week to see if it lifts and signed me off work for a week. This week I haven't cried as much, but have no energy, and still feel quite sad a lot of the time. I'm sleeping a lot and struggling to do stuff. My anxiety has also got a lot worse and I'm finding everything really hard.

I know there's nothing anyone can say really, and if I'm still bad next week I have to go back to the doctor's, but I'm just really disappointed that when I felt I was moving forwards I've gone a million miles backwards.

[Ingenious]

This is common - the moving forwards and backwards. I think with the best will in the world we are always going to have bad days, sometimes for no reason. On my own mood chart I can have weeks of normality then get "mugged" by anxiety/depression for seemingly no reason, which does pass in time.

Unfortunately it is human nature to forget about the preceding long period of brilliance and happiness and instead focus on the few bad days - but you really have to do a bit of CBT on yourself here and put the bad days in perspective. For example, you said in your own post how well you were doing. So have you really gone a million miles backwards, or is the truth that you have actually done really well and simply had a short period of down time? If you focus on the time when you were happy and consider that each day will take you closer to getting back there, you will.

In other words, don't let the bad phases fool you into thinking that's how you are always going to be - it's a mirage - it's just a blip :)

[lizzie29]

Thanks for your reply. I'm normally quite good as seeing these days as 'blips' and tell myself that everyone has bad days, regardless of having anxiety or depression. And I know logically that it pro bably will pass and I'll get better, but hard to see that sometimes! Your words make a lot of sense though, so will re-read them to remind myself!