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HannahN
30-07-11, 06:49
Hiya, Sorry I didn't know where to put this but i need to ask as its causing my anxiety to flare up again and is already making me ill.
Okay so I'm 20 years old and Iv'e been with my partner since I was 13. We've been together for 7 years next month and its been going really really well. Problem is I found a plain cased cd under my bed and asked my boyfriend what it was and he said a music cd however I didn't trust the way he said it. He hid it at some point over the next day and I (not going to lie) looked for it. When I found it well ..easy to say there was porn on it. I wasn't bothered at the fact of what it was but the lying made me uneasy. So i wanted to know what else he was hiding and I am ashamed to say my anxiety got the best of me and I checked his old phones, facebook and emails. All had messages and pictures of other women and his phone had porn. So we had a chat and appeared to have cleared it all up. However I kept having a funny feeling and have been rather cold towards him about the messages from other girls. Anyway he went out last night and when he came back woke me up (was still dazed and had my eyes closed) and when he hadn't gotten into bed within 10 mins I looked up to see him watching a porn channel :/ which makes me very angry as even though I saw it and he saw i did he still denied it saying he was just flicking though channels. I'm so worried that our relationship is crumbling as i love him so much but he can't stop lying to me. Please help I feel so ill and hurt. Thank you x :weep:

london
30-07-11, 15:15
you must ask your self can you trust him
then your get the anser to stay or go its that easy
god bless

Anxious_gal
30-07-11, 16:58
Maybe he has a porn addiction?
Addicts lie about their addiction, even when confronted wit evidence.

peter34uk
30-07-11, 17:32
Im sorry but what your describing in terms of the porn he's watching is pretty normal for guys to do.

You been together since very young and for 7 years. So rather than cheat, he watches porn and you bet your bottom doller he will fantasise, even flirt with other women.

BUT when the crunch hits, he comes home to you & I bet he hasn't cheated.

You do need to confront his girls messages though!

london
30-07-11, 19:55
if its just porn and not other girls i dont think you need worry
god bless

Tyke
31-07-11, 05:24
Im sorry but what your describing in terms of the porn he's watching is pretty normal for guys to do.

You been together since very young and for 7 years. So rather than cheat, he watches porn and you bet your bottom doller he will fantasise, even flirt with other women.

BUT when the crunch hits, he comes home to you & I bet he hasn't cheated.

You do need to confront his girls messages though!

Peter has it spot on here. I've known quite a few guys in the past who have used porn but stayed faithful. It's a shame he couldn't be a bit more honest about it when you confronted him though and he does sound a bit obsessed with it.

Messages from other girls are a different matter altogether though. He really has crossed the line here and has some explaining to do in my opinion.

Tyke

HannahN
31-07-11, 07:18
Thank you all for your replies! We had a BIG talk last night and hopefully have cleared it all up!

x