I really need positive support please

[Ambers]

I really need some support - I am so upset and worried that I may have terminal cancer.

It all started in March when I was having pain in the ovary area on the right. I was worried about ovarian cancer - lots of tests inc bloods, US scan and MRI scan - all came back clear. I started then to get itchy toes, bruises on my legs and blood blisters in my mouth...I tried to put this all down to anxiety. I am quite sure the doctors were writing 'anxiety' in their notes

Then my groin lymph came up and orginally the doctor thought in was an enlarged vein. Well I have just come back from seeing another independant doctor after a few days of really sore pelvis and legs who confirmed that infact it was my lymph gland and is the size of a thumb! he has sent me (there and then) for urgent blood tests.

The lymph is soft and spongey...I am so worried that all ths time I have been going back and forth to the doctors that I have had 'C' and now it is too late. I am a mother to young child who is starting school in Sept, I need to be there for him till is at least a young adult -and my hubby :weep:

How I am going to cope from my agoraphobia taking off again because I know the stress of this will trigger it all off again.

I have no one really to talk to either (hubby pretends it is not happening) and no friends. My family are a nightmare when it comes to illness so I steer clear.

Help

[daisydoo]

Hi so sorry you feel so sad. I have an enlarged node in my groin. It has been the same size for a few months. Checked regularly but as not changed doc said forget it. When you say independent doc do you mean private? You have bloods done so anything will show in that. Results would be back today if done early or defo tomorrow. I know how you feel about your child. I have two young children and my biggest fear is not been here. Worry about silly things thier dad wouldnt do right. I also know how you feel been told something you weren't expecting. After 18months of been told my heart is anxiety. Lots of ecgd and saw cardiologists all said it was ok. Saw another cardiologist last week who said there is a problem and has ordered more tests. Got an exercise tolerance test tomorrow and really dreading as after exertion is when i get most problems. Convinced i have cardiomyopathy. So not much support really but just wantrd to reply and say good luck and let me know how it Goes x

[Ambers]

Thank you Daisy - and good luck tomorrow x

[bluetopazgirl]

Good luck for both of you and massive hugs!! I'm a young mum too with young children (4 and 10months) and I'm convinced I have the big C too because of enlarged nodes xx

[daisydoo]

Thanks. Maybe the doctor was covering everthing as he could see how anxious you were. And you have had scans that were fine so thats positive. And maybe its enlarged as you are run down with,all the worry. Mouth ulcers are a sign of this. I know its easy to say look positive because im the worlds worst as looking at the worst. And if it was a private doc they seem to cover more and not always needed xx

[daisydoo]

Hi novemberangel. Mine as one and five. Thats hard enough without our stressing. I have replied to your posts before and really think you dont have lymphoma but so easy for me to say and can totally understand your fear. Will be glad when tomorrow is over-i think! Keep imagining they will admit me because they will find something really dangerous. What we all like :hugs:

[countrygirl]

I am sure if you had a mri scan of your pelvis then any iffy lymph nodes in that area would have been seen on the scan , maybe the node has come up since your scan????

I am sure the Dr is covering all bases as they say. When do you get results?

[TooWorried]

Hey there, Ambers. I'm right there with you. Swollen nodes that won't go down and a small child that I HAVE to be here for. On top of the nodes, I have boob issues and innumerable other issues that scare me to death. Feel free to pm me if you want to chat.

[Ambers]

Thank you all - I just know the results are not going to be favourable and I am ready for a fight with cancer. I now all along this wasn't anxiety but felt the doctors were not really listening. I haven't slept and I just know it will be advanced as I have been in pain for too long. How do I tell a 4 year old... I also want to grown up with his mummy and daddy (I only had one parent). I am so tearful but need to get on playing with my child x

[bluetopazgirl]

Oh hunni :hugs: i know totally how you feel, and today have been same looking at my 4year old and 10month old and just bursting into tears. i am riddled (if thats a word) with fear! if you want to pm me hun maybe we could talk more, im here if you need me :D