Toby, this is a new thread about the same subject from a few weeks ago..
https://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showth...ody-Dysmorphia
I get it, I really do, but what responses are you hoping to get here that you didn't get before?
I wrote you a massive reply on that thread. I
had body dysmorphia and that's how I overcame it. Sympathy is a given but it won't help you out of the hole you're in..
You can either keep recycling the same words under new thread titles, or you can roll your proverbial sleeves up and get proactive and that starts with the decision that you're going to do something about this rather than wallow in self-pity. Nobody can do this for you - it has to come from
you.
So you think that challenging your thoughts won't help?
What do
you think will help?
If you're waiting for a time when everybody thinks you're gorgeous, then you'll be waiting forever because:
beauty is subjective.
So swipe all that 'other people' shit off the table and start with the most important thing - which is how
you feel about
yourself.
To change how you feel, you're going to have to challenge your thinking and re-frame, and that's the bottom line. There is no quick or magical fix here because this here is a prison of your own making and the key
is there; you just need to use it.
Wallow on the pity pot if you want but that'll get you nowhere. You are allowing
strangers to dictate how you feel about yourself? That's some kind of power to be giving over to people who you don't even know, right?
Also, the jealousy thing..
We live in an era of digital imaging where we can make ourselves look like movie stars with a few clicks.
IT'S NOT REAL!
People on dating apps usually bring their A game to the table, and that often involves some kind of photo manipulation because God forbid we should see somebody as they really are? A little of improved lighting? Sure. Changing our features until we're unrecognisable? What's the point? :whistles:
Have
you ever rejected someone solely on looks?
If the answer is yes, you don't get to complain when people do it you.
The fact that you're only attracted to 'attractive' people suggests that you have?
You're young and that's why this shit matters to you more than it should do. I blame all this photo manipulation crap!
To me, there is nothing
remotely attractive about someone who is fixated on their looks, trust me. But somebody who can make me laugh? I'm there. A twinkle in the eyes? Yup. A nice @rse? Yep! In my case, someone who can let me be
me and not do a runner. :yesyes:
I'm married to a man who tells me I'm beautiful and the most gorgeous woman on the planet, and he's not always drunk. And this is on days where I'm in bed (ill) no make-up, and with a month's growth of leg hair. I hit the jackpot with this guy and it only took me 15 years to believe him thanks to me taking on board other people's self esteem issues.
This is the sort of person who you want to aim for if you ever want to be happy..
Anybody who will tell you that you're 'ugly' or use any other derogatory term -
isn't someone who will make you happy. You need to adjust your expectations and search your heart for what you really want out of life..
That is, unless you're actually
into people with as much depth as a toddlers paddling pool? :shrug:
