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My Escitalopram diary
For the past ten years I have suffered with GAD and panic attacks mainly due to being in a bad marriage, which I finally walked away from back in March with my 9 year old son. At the time I had been prescribed Mirtazapine as after 3 horrific start up's on Citalopram, I asked if I could try something different. Unfortunatley the Mirtazapine only made me more ill and was a nightmare to quit. Next I tried Venlafaxine but it made me terribly sick and totally anxious so I switched to Trazodone after 5 days but saw no imporvement after 3 weeks which eventually made me decide the only way forward was to go back on Citalopram as it has never failed me in the past. I was so pleased when the doctor said he would give me the new version escitalopram, though still too terrified to take my first pill for a couple of days and when I finally went for it I chopped it in half and have been taking 2.5mg's for 7 days along with 2mg's of Lorazepam when i first wake up and feel pretty rough, not exactly anxious anymore just terribly flat like grief. But despite a few bad headaches which have now passed, I think I am coping with this dose really well and am feeling pretty much normal most of the day. Now I just need to take the full 5mg pill and hope that's not when I will be hit with lots of horrible side effects but need to get the Escitalopram working on it's own without needing benzo's. I am feeling very positive about my medication though and am actually sleeping better than I have in months, I'd got so bad at sleeping some nights I was awake by 1am having panic atacks and ringing the NHS helpline but since I started Escitalopram I've not even been worried about retiring for the night. My feelings of grief pass quickly and I am confident once I get on the correct dose my life will really get right back on track like the rest of it is now i have got a lovley new appartment, my little boy loves his new school and though my Husband is making my divorce as difficult as possible I no longer let him bother me as he is a 100 miles away and can no longer control me.:)
---------- Post added at 10:11 ---------- Previous post was at 09:57 ----------
Escitalopram is a walk in the park compared to the old style (or it has been so far, lol)
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Good Luck Karen :hugs: I hope things continue to improve for you xxx :flowers:
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Good luck Karen, it sounds like you're improving already and have an optomistic outlook which always helps.
Keep posting, I will follow your thread with interest as I have escitalopram liquid prescribed but have yet to take it, too stubborn and chicken!
I hope you continue to improve
Sam x
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Sam you will be fine. I was absolutley terrified after been on normal Cit 3 times and going through horrific side effects each time but so far, EsCit has been totally tolerable...I've had a bit of anxiety today but just a little nervousness, nothing bad. I'm worried about upping my dose but think I may do it in quaters and have my Lorazepam to help if I do get really anxious. All the best darl xx
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
You're doing amazing, Karen! I look forward to reading your progress. Your increase to 5mg should go pretty smoothly. Try not to worry. I only noticed a significant increase in side effects when I increased to 10mg. Wishing you every success and happiness:hugs: xxx
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Thanks Cat, I'm feeling really quite flat today so maybe its time to go up to my 5mg pill, I'm also a bit hormonal at the mo too which always effects me ): I should be ok as the morning ticks by, I'm not normally depressed just terribly anxious but this is probs just me calming down happens and the chemicals all changing in my body. Still glad I decided to take escitalopram though as my days have been much better than before i went on it, bit worried over the increase but 'm sure I'll be ok in a couple of days even if I do get a few more side effects (:
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
:)Day 9
I took the plunge last night and took a full 5mg pill. I went to bed at 9.30 and woke about 4.30 so not too bad but did feel very low again and still do feel pretty flat but not half as bad now I've got up, been to school and back with my little boy, done a bit of house work. More than anything I seem to have a rotten headache but have already taken paracetamols to try and ward it off, it should go soon hopefully. I'm also feeling like I could just go back to sleep so not feeling totally brilliant at the mo but hoping to see some real improvement when I have reached the 2 week mark and onwards. Even though I had a much better week last week, I just need to give this medicine a real chance if I am ever to get well again after failing miserably on Mirtazapine, Venlafaxine and Trazodone. Escitalopram's not as kind as I first thought but it is by no means as evil as normal Citalopram. I dont seem to have much of an appetitie but believe this to be very normal so have stocked up on fruit and salad and I'm making sure I DRINK LOTS OF WATER Too. :yesyes:
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
It's 5pm now and I'm feeling totally normal after a bit of a rocky day but not an horrific day. I've just wanted to sleep all the time and had a terrible headache, then had some nervousness around 2pm but it went away when I switched on the telly and after I went to pick my little boy up from school. Wills and I have just been doing homework together and though my appetitie is still really poor I've managed a bowl of vegatable soup. Usually normal Citalopram woould have me totally panic sticken by now but touch wood, I think I'm going to be ok on Cipralex and am no longer scared of taking
it.
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
great news Karen :yesyes: hope it continues for you, you so deserve it :bighug1: xx
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
You're doing great
:hugs:
Happy for you:)
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
I work with a woman going through a similar situation with her husband. She is currently packing her stuff up to move to a new place with 2 young children at the end of the month. Her husband is being as difficult as one could possibly be. Its not an easy situation. Hopefully the worst of your divorce is now behind you. Just keep doing what you are doing with the cipralex, things are looking up!
Good Luck.
Mike
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It's bloomin hard starting from scratch but I have such a great family and now only live minutes away from my Sister. All I can tell your friend is you do manage and you do cope!!! I'd def walk away again.. I'm just mad at myself that I let my Husband make me so ill but my life is really taking shape now and hopefully the Escitalopram is really going to help me though I'm feeling a bit rough today. My increase seems to be giving me really bad heads, I had bad heads when I first started my meds and it passed after a day or 2. I'm also feeling a little flat, especially when I wake up, I feel pretty terrible in fact when I first wake up but just tell myself it will pass and once I am up and about getting my little boy ready for school start to feel a bit better and right now I'm ok all in all. I was a bit scatty this morning and left William's pack lunch inthe fridge but luckily spotted it and took it down to my sisters house who is a dinner lady to give him, poor kid, I won't do that again in a hurry! ha ha. I'm looking forward to geting beyond these initial first few weeks.
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Well last night I was falling asleep whilst early evening tv was on so was wide awake again by half past 12 and didn't really sleep again, I had those horrible hot flushes and just felt really agitated so took a couple of Lorazepam but they didn't really help much or possibly stopped me from having a panic attack. The best of it is I've felt like a zombie all morning (I did remember to give my little boy his lunch today though, ha ha ha!)I'm ok now but this second week as been a lot harder as I had loads of energy last week, where as this week life feels a bit like a struggle, I've done my usual domesticated jobs though, got Wills off to school, even dyed my hair so I'm determined to to just lay here all day giving in to feeling so unmotivated...right now mood pretty good but during the night nope ): Still this is all still miles better than whenever I started normal Citalopram and always remember picking up a bit once a fortnight or so had gone by but always needed about 4 or 5 months to be totally perfect again.
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
DAY 13 at 5mgs
Didn't sleep very well again last night but a bit better than the previous night. I was wide awake at 3-30am feeling flat and aggitated but didnt have the horrible hot flushes ): I took a couple of Lorazepam pills but don't think I ever back to sleep and couldn't wait to get up and just get moving about The time leading up to getting William to school was a struggle because I feel a bit shakey, slightly anxious, have the most rotten heachache but most of all feel so low and I wasn't depressed until I started the pills but figure it's just the upset of whatever is going on in my brain right now and things will even out again as I settle. My mood soon lifts nayhow once I get on with my day and the feelings I felt earlier are all just a bad memory now but wish they would start subsiding a little as I really do dread waking up at the mo.
Any way I've managed to get on with my normal every day jobs and bobs and may go into town with my Sister after school tonight as I think the more normal life I try to lead the quicker I will get better and after 7 month sof failed medications, I am certain Escitalopram is the one that is going to work because of the positives I have already felt despite the bad nights and rocky mornings. But my anxiety is so so muc better all ready, not that I'd want to take Lorazepam out of the equation just yet but hopefully I can soon. Those of you who have taken old Cit and the newer version is there any time difference in how long the meds take to kick in or is it just the same and down to each individual???
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
karenp:
Have you looked into the vitamin Melatonin? It could help you with your sleeping issues. Its non addictive and i know has really helped some people trying to get on Cipralex get a better nights rest. You can buy it at any drug store. My wife takes one occasionally and then she sleeps like a log. My wife says it guarantees her a minimum of 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep.
Mike
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Thanks Mike, I'll check that out as was wide awake at 2.30am again but not feeling flat anymore, just very aggitated which I hope goes away soon but my mood is defo much much better and I'm no longer getting the headaches or flushing.
Just done the school run and my little household jobs, then I'm going grocery shopping this afternoon but still feeling quite nervy, hopefully it'll wear off as I dont really want take any extra benzo's. Then tomorrow I'm taking my little boy for the lights switching on in town, Chas Dingle is doing them seen as I live in Emmerdale land ha ha (:
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I had a look in the supermarket for the vitamin you mentioned Mike but probs need to go to a proper chemist for it as I couldn't stop it at all ): They just had all the usual ineffective stuff like Nytol and Kalms. But another rubbish nights sleep minus any panic atacks tankfully but I did take Lorazepam to make sure one didn't come on. I just feel sleep deprived really, aggitated still and my mood is very low for a few hours in the morning but then I go totally ok so Cipralex must be doing something hey (:
I'm still planning to go to the Christmas lights switch on tonight and who knows the fresh air might make me sleep better tonight. (or should that be gale force winds and rain they have forecast, arrrgggghhh! lol)
I've been on Cipralex just over 2 weeks now, one at 2-5mg and this week at 5mg's so I'm hoping things sart really turning around next week even though my days are already greatly improved, feel a little flat at times and had a cry last night about what my life was like last year and I've had a failed marriage, lost my lovely home and everything and my Hubby won't even let me have my personal stuff and my solicitor keeps saying she's'gonna get tough with him and then nothing ever happens. He's also had our house taken off all the internet sites like rightmove too so no one will even know its for sale now and we ave alot of equity in but he wants to stay there and not give me a penny, which is what its always been like, he couldn't share, cope with being married and the responsibility of having a wife and child to support which landed me in this anxiety state 4 times over the past ten years and this time I just knew I had to get out. I'd been ok the rest of the day too so I guess I understand about what you mean now Mike the up and down emotions in the first few days of taking cipralex, plus I think it was the prospect of not sleeping again. Seriously thinking of asking to go back on Zopiclone for a couple of weeks till things even out.
---------- Post added at 11:53 ---------- Previous post was at 09:03 ----------
Well apart from feeling really shatered right now my mood is good again and I have no anxiety (phew!!!). I've got my little Nephew staying over for the night with my Mum and my Auntie's just rang to say she's going to visit tonight at 7pm and bring her friend who is also going through a divorce and is on normal Citalopram. I just hope I stay awake, ha ha!!! Seriously, I was a bit like,"Oh no," at first but it'll probs do me a world of good having someone here who understands what both going through a bad divorce is like and who is suffering with depression because of it, even though the last time I saw Karen, she didn't have any anxiety symptoms and I always think the anxiety is worse, not that I like feeling incredibly low the times depression has hit me but panic just terrifies me despite suffering with it on and off for ten years. But the Cipralex is both getting me out to see the Christmas lights in town today and a few weeks ago I would have made an excuse for my Auntie not to come with her friend, where as I am def up for it right now, j ust wish this terrible fatique would go, perhaps when I've had some fresh air hey!!! I've read some pretty bad things about Cipralex on the net but to be fair, I think it's been one of the easiest ad's I've ever taken so far, it;s just the going up to 10mg's bit that worries me in case that is when I feel the worst side effects but other sites I have read state it has few side effects, plus I've done normal Citalopram 3 times so I can do this, ha ha ha!
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
karenp: I am in Canada, so maybe Melatonin is easier to find over here. Its on the shelf here in any drug store, much like vitamin C. It wasn't expensive either. I am sorry to hear about whats going on with the end of your marriage, it must be so tough for you. That would be hard for anyone to get through. Hopefully your divorce doesnt drag on forever, getting closure is important. I really feel bad for you, but the bright side is your child is with you.
The up and down emotions will slow down in a week or so. You will just need to get through it. Not sleeping cant be helping either. I find my anxiety is always worse when i am overtired. Outside of that, it sounds like you are dealing with the side effects rather well.
Take care of yourself.
Mike
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
It really is night time and early mornings I struggle with as the rest of the day is more or less fine already, I get a bit of anxiety occasionally but nothing to how it was but these low feelings are all new to me and hope they go away really soon. Had a lovley time at the the Christmas lights switch on though even though it rained like mad (typical British weather, ha ha!!!)
---------- Post added at 08:28 ---------- Previous post was at 08:26 ----------
Ps.Did Cipralex make every one else feel really low at first and if so how long did it roughly last ): I know I did experience this on normal Citalopram but you forget once you are well again how long it took for me to start feeling much betterand all in all I think I am doing pretty ok and feel great in the evening.
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Today is day 20 I think, I've been on 3mg's of Escitalopram for a week at least now anyhow but my mood has become very flat especially during the night when I cant sleep and can only describe those feelings as horrible but hey, they pass and now it's 10-20am and though my moods not happy, happy, happy like I'd love it to be quite yet I'm over the worst for today and am just going to keep totally occupied. Just been and got myself a nice salad from the shop even thoghmy appetitie is still pretty pathetic, I managed to be bad and open a selection box I'd bought for my nephew yesterday though and scoff lots of chocolate out of that, lol!!! I'll get another one this week and wrap it up this time, ha ha! OOOH and because I'm not eating all that great I def don't need any Bridget Jones knickers this year for Christmas, ha ha.
I NEED to make an appointment with one of my doctors this week so will mention Cipralex seems to be causing me to have depression, which I didn't have before but always remember having it each and every time I took old style Citalopram until things settled down. Maybe the doctor will give me some sleeping pills for a couple of weeks too as I don't know if it's Lorazepam lowering my mood and it doesn't make me sleep like Zopiclone did which I never have any issues just stopping (: The good news is I've not had any panic attacks for 3 weeks, no longer have flushing, really bad headaches, I do get a few little brain zaps when I first wake up and the misery feeling sets in but all in all think I am doing just fine and want to carry on with \cipralex very much at this point.
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
DAY 21
Still on 5mg's of Cipralex.
Still had another rubbishynights sleep last night, I woke up at 2am and then just lay there but didn't really have any horrible low mood feelings which was one thing, just some irritability. I'm feeling very nervous right now as I have to ring my doctor up for an appointment and always get into a it of a state worrying they won't give me any more Lorazepam to help me through these early days, even though I am going to ask for some Zopiclone I think as it seems to work better for me and I never have any probs stopping it. Roll on when I've been and calm down and even better when all I need is my little white Cipralex pill, ha ha!
All in all I had a brilliant day yesterday though with no anxiety at all, apart from the usual dodgy start. I don't know about anyone else but even when i do feel good, I am still constantly wondering when the anxiety will come one where as I should just forget about it but I took my Son into town after school to Mcdonalds with my Sister and her 2 boys. The 2 youngest, including my horrible chimp were playing up showing off infront of eachother most of the time so I did feel stressed but only normal stress, lol!!! But I am getting out more now and feeling more normal whilst I am out where as a few weeks ago if I ventured out I'd either have nervousness or chest tightening symptoms or not be able to breathe right. I hope it's the Cipralex helping me not just the Llorazepam keeping me calmer but apart from my sleep, I think I can feel myself improving, it might be a good Christmas after all, heh heh!!!
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Thats great news karen :D x x
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Mmmmmmmm McDonalds! :)
KarenP: I am glad to hear you are starting to have better days! One of the first things i noticed when i started to feel better on Cipralex was when i was out in crowded malls or stores i didn't feel anxious anymore. I hate shopping on the best of days, but i think a lot of that is because it always made me feel anxious. I absolutely hate feeling anxious in public. It would make me grumpy! I go out shopping now with the wife and kids and i really don't feel that anxiety anymore. I still get frustrated at the crowds but thats normal for me. The anxiety i felt was more of a nauseous, nervous or worried feeling.
I hope your sleep gets better! The fact you are still having some really good parts to your day is a huge positive to me. You are feeling better despite the lack of proper sleep. I think once you get your sleeping issues resolved one way or another you are going to love life again!
Take Care,
Mike
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DAY 22
After seeing my doctor yesterdy and telling her how rubbish my sleep is (which has been for months to be fair!) she decided to put me back on Zopiclone for a couple of weeks and says the insomnia will pass the more Cipralex takes effect, gosh I hope it takes effect after 7 months of severe anxiety and sleep deprirvation and 3 other failed ad's. I do think there has defo been improvement already though despite me obviously still needing to take sedative medicines to help me through these early stages. I'm so hoping I am going to be like you Mike ((((((:
I had a brilliant day yesterday though with only a weenie bit of anxiety around lunch time so I just switched on tv, had my lunch, drank a pint of water which I was told by the doctor I saw at the hospital is really good to drink as much as you can of. In fact apart from milk, I drink nothing else nowadays. Anyhow, I had my Sister and her 2 kids round for tea as her Husband was working till ten and felt very relaxed all day and dare I say it NORMAL.
After not taking any Lorazepam today and just the Zopiclone I do have a bit of nervousness now but it's way down the scale so maybe, just maybe, ESCITALOPRAM is doing something already. My mood is brilliant that is for sure and just need to totally kick this anxiousness now, fingers crossed without having to go up to the next dose but it I have to I have to (: I'm going to give this 5mg's chance first and will probably up in quaters to keep the side efefcts at bay, not that I've found the side effects at all bad starting up on Escitalopram :shrug::yesyes:
---------- Post added at 10:02 ---------- Previous post was at 09:56 ----------
I might even wrap the 2 pressies I've bought for Chrismtas so far today, lol!!! I am soooo unorganised this year but it's been a lousy year.
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Glad to hear you got a better nights sleep. I am also happy to hear you are feeling better. My sleeping patterns are pretty good right now. I am not having any issues falling asleep, i do find i wake up here and there in the middle of the night to check the time. I guess somewhere in my brain i am worried i am going to oversleep my alarm which hasn't happened in a long time. Things are starting to look up Karen and it only gets better. As i stated before, i noticed a big difference at day 30. So, hopefully sometime around there you will feel even better.
As far as the dosage increase, if it were me personally i'd leave it alone until after Christmas. That will be roughly 6 weeks for you on 5 mg. You might feel good enough by then and wont feel a need to make an increase. I am leaving my dosage alone for now, because i am feeling pretty good. In fact i don't go back to the doctor until January 28th, so i won't be touching my dosage for a couple of months.
Take Care,
Mike
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
DAY 23
Still having rubbishy sleep but have Zopiclone to help. I took this for five onths whilst on Mirtazapine this past 7 months (Reminder: the Mirtazapine just made me more poorly hence the change to Escitalopram!) and because I took it every night to get some sleep it stopped working, I've been off it 3 weeks now and it's working great again but the sooner I am off extra meds the better.
I have no anxiety at all right now but just feel a little flat, not terrible, just slightly flat like I'm almost normal but not totally if that makes sense though early mornings are stilla struggle but not anywhere near as bad as they were before the Cipralex. I normally find once I have got up, got my little boy ready for school, come back from school and get on with my lovely domesticated stuff I am starting to feel much better and the worst of my day is over till tomorrow. I don't know what I'd be like if I wasn't on my sedatives at this point, whether I'd have anxiety during the day or if Cipralex is beginning to work on it's own. I am so looking forward to day 30 Mike, ha ha! But I really do think I am already so much better already even if it is partly the sedatives playing a part in that but wish I'd been introduced to Escitalopram months ago.
Not got much planned today apart from picking Wills up from school later so I might watch a dvd, I've been tot he shop and treated myself to some puff pastry mince pies with brandy in them so I shall scoff a couple of them tuning into my movie and just chill out (:
It's cold here to Mike but probs not quite as cold as Canada. It's really nice out in fact, sunny and still and a little bit frosty this morning, I love this time of year normally but am so disorganised this year with being ill for so long so need to do some serious Chrimbo shopping (: My 9 year old still believes in Santa 100% too so we need to visit Santa somewhere soon too so he can make me cringe with all the stuff he'll ask for like ipads and that, lol!
You know Mike, I think I am gonna stick with 5mg's of Cipralex for now and just give it time to reach it's full benefit and then ask to go up to 10mg's if I am still needing sedatives first thing when I am still feeling anxiety at this point and need them for sleep. Only 7 more days till I reach day 30 so I'd better be like you Mike, ha ha ha!
Mr G, how are you today anyhow????
---------- Post added at 11:11 ---------- Previous post was at 11:06 ----------
PS. awww ta Nicola. Hope you are feeling so much better too. I know you've just had yet more horrible luck losing your Grandad. This year will soon be over and surely it's our turn to have a brill one in 2013 (;
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DAY 24
I'm feeling a it jittery today and have some anxiety but hopefully it will soon wear off. I think I worked myself up a lot yesterday over my ex Husband letting him get to me, so it's probs that and stil very early days on the minimum dose of Cipralex.
I did sleep a bit better last night so that's one thing, very tired today ironically (:
---------- Post added at 09:46 ---------- Previous post was at 09:46 ----------
Mike, when you reached day 30 did you still have any anxiety at all or is that when it went away????
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Quote:
Originally Posted by
karenp
Mike, when you reached day 30 did you still have any anxiety at all or is that when it went away????
Karenp:
I would say by Day 30 i was feeling very little anxiety if any! My day 30 was November 9th, I have a daily logbook i keep at work and I just looked back at my working schedule on that date. It was 3 weeks ago today actually, and i had a really busy work day. I had a lot to accomplish that day despite being short staffed 2 people. Other then being physically exhausted at the end of that day I do not recall any form of anxiety at all. I also had a really good weekend the following two days after, so i would say my answer to your question would be "No, i can't remember feeling any anxiety on that day".
Take Care,
Mike
P.S. I think its a smart decision to stay at 5 mg, no sense in rushing it. Especially since you are sensitive to these types of medications. I'm no doctor, but i'd give your body time to regulate on 5 mg for minimum 6 weeks, you are half way there now.
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Thanks Mike.
Well today I've had a real OFF kind of day, I just slept most of the morning (which I hate ever doing when I can't sleep at night) and I've had anxiety that's only just really worn off. How odd as I've been really great part from first thing for days but I hope to think of it as maybe a BLIP day (fingers crossed anyhow). For the first time since I started Cipralex I had those horrible feelings of being scared again though about where the anxiety was leading (ie.panic attack??) Luckily it never got any worse but I had to go grocery shopping and can't say I enjoyed it very much but hey, tomorrow is another day ((((((:
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DAY 25
What a rubbishy nights sleep again. Even though I coudn't stay awake most of the day yesterday I felt so exhausted. I don't thik Zopiclone and Cipralex are doing me any good so am gonna ask to switch back to Lorazepam as I also feel very edgy at the mo, so disappointed as I really thought the Cipralex was beginnging to work but it's obviously taking the Lorazepam that has given me so many much calmer, anxiety free days at this point. Maybe it's just going to take longer for me to kick in or I am going to need the higher dose ): Just gonna see what my doctor says when I see him on Monday.
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day 26
Feeling fed up right now, I had a panic attack this morning so big blip. I'm at my doctorstomorrow because 5mg's isn't enough to make my anxiey calm down????
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Oh hun :hugs: sending you big :hugs: x x x x
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Thanks Nicola, hope you are ok. I've been really calm the last few days too but it's just been the last though I'm hardly sleeping and working myself up about it I think. I might swap Cipralex to mornings and see if that helps, will def speak to my doctor tomorrow as I really need this meds to work now and get off stuff like zopiclone and Lorazepam as I also get worked up about how long my doctor will give me these kind of drugs.
---------- Post added at 09:54 ---------- Previous post was at 09:52 ----------
so always worry when I start to run low on them, pathetic I know but I am so scared of panic attacks that it's my own fault I end up having one.
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Karenp:
Sorry to hear you have been struggling the last few days. Lets face it, you been through a very stressful stretch in your life with your marriage. I think that might be a good idea to try taking it in the mornings. I dont think you have much to lose, but others might disagree. I've been taking mine in the mornings since day 1. That's about the only thing we are doing differently. It's 7:38 pm here right now and I am starting to feel my eyes getting tired now.
I'm praying things get better for you, I still believe they will in time.
Take care,
Mike
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Thank You Mike, I hope so too even though I just had the worst night for ages. William had terrible tooth ache all night long and wa sliterally screaming so I just kept getting more and more anxious, have had zero sleep and have been sick 5 or 6 times. I'm about to make an appointment to visit my doctor and tell him even though I def want to stick the Cipralex out, he needs to help me more with my terrible sleep pattern as until that comes a bit right I don't see me getting well as I have a real problem about not sleeping at night, I panic over it!
Any how, little man is at the dentist at 11am to get his teeth sorted out so hopefully we'll sleep tonight.
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Hi Karenp,
Same here with the sleep, no sleep for me last night, and before and before Night felt like eternity. I think ichecked the clock every 5-15 mins.
If i het a good sleep my anx will go right down.
Strangely when i was out and about dropping kids off and on the way to work i felt better than few days ago. So cipralex must be starting to work somehow.
Hope something will start working for you.
I am pretty sure that every time its not just one magic remedy that works - ita combination of every effort, same as whats leading to anx period - not just one reason - many reasons...
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I totally agree Thumbalina, I know once I start having less anxiety I forget about it more and more and do more stuff which leads to less and less anxiety if that makes sense (:
I think Cipralex is doing something for me already too as I more or less feel fine during the day even after my blip weekend where as 3 weeks ago I was often having bad afternoon anxiety, watch now I've put that I will get some this afternoon, ha ha!
I'm full of cold now too....speaking of opening my mouth and saying stuff like,"I've not had a cold once this year" to my Mum the other day, lol!
I'm the same too, if my sleep came back I'd be so much better, I dread night time and the doctor I've just seen wants me to take only one Lorazepam now instead of 2. He also wants me to go up to 10mg's of Cipralex so I'm scared, ha ha! He did say it should really kick in then so I might give it a try tonight or I might do an extra half. He said if I had no side effects starting off on 5mg's I should be ok going up to 10 but normal Citalopram has scared me off SSRI'S for life ): He also said some people even go up to 20mg's so 10 is no biggie says he who has probs never taken an ad in is life (;
So as I say, I might just do an extra half tonight if I'm not too chicken, ha ha!
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Karen:
I know when i am triggered badly, which hasn't happened since October 17th.. One of the first things that goes through my head is. "Great, now i won't sleep!." I completely psych myself out to the point where i won't allow my body to relax enough to fall asleep. It sounds to me like you are so anxious at night your mind is just spinning with negative thoughts.
I know there are lots and lots of people who take their meds at night with no problems hoping to sleep off any side effects. I take my 5 mg at roughly 6 AM because i work so early and usually 8 AM on weekends. When i was getting over the first 20 days or so i found i was more anxious in the mornings and into the afternoon before i finally got some relief at around 2 PM or 3 PM. Then i felt fine all evening and by the time 9 PM came along i was dead tired and falling asleep on my couch. You seem to take your med in the evening or before bed sometime, then you go through the anxiety i was having in the mornings all night and into your morning, but it seems to get better in the early afternoon. One of the things you have stated in the beginning is how you were super sensitive to SSRI's, so that is likely part of the issue too.
It sounds to me the med is the most active in our bodies for 5 or 6 hours after you take it, which for me in the beginning was always the most anxious time of my day. So, if your sleeping is being affected, i would seriously consider taking it in the mornings. My doctor told me to take it in the mornings and NOT at night. I didn't question it, i just did it. The other thing he told me is to make sure you take it with food. I always have a bowl of cereal and a banana or something then take it. Anytime i take it on its own i get one of those full body hot flush things.
Hope this helps.
Mike
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
Thanks Mike, that really does help. I noticed last night when I couldn't sleep at all I had those flushes and not exactly panic anymore, just real horrible restlessness which I guess is an improvement and I can feel the meds trying to do something. I may take half a pill tonight then and then half tomorrow morning and then switch to day time as I always took normal Cit mornings apart from one time but always slept on Citalopram, apart from the very first couple of days.
William and I have slept most of this afternoon so now I'm worried I'll be wide awake all night again and am meant to only take one Lorazepam pill now, even 2 didn't help much, argggghhh! ): I'm absolutely full of cold too, how's yours? I feel wonderful, I honestly do, moaning effort! ha ha ha ha!
My Sister's just dropped by and told me to just go on the 10mg dose now as it might mean I get well in time for Christmas rather than being scared of a few days of heightened anxiety and if it does hit me bad, I can always go back and ust tell the doctor I need a few more Lorazepam for a couple of days to help it. But being on the 5mg's honeslty hasn't been all that bad heightened anxiety wise and I've had quite a bit of really flat mood more than actual anxiety as apart from early mornings and over this past weekend, my anxiety levels have been brilliant.
The doctor did say hopefully the Cipralex should kick in really soon now so I hope he's right as I read loads of reviews earlier and most people said they felt much beter around week 4 much like yourself. I just hope I'm not one of the unlucky ones that it takes 4 months to level out on, there I go being all negative, ha ha! It's brill to have your support on here though, knowing how well you are feeling on the whole now in such a short time and I know though I feel pretty rough right now (ta to this dreadful winter cold) I am so much better than I was before I started Cipralex, I've been out so many more times lately than the past few months.
Thubalina, how are you today???? Hope every one else is ok (:
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Re: My Escitalopram diary
DAY 28
I have decided not to up my dose of Cipralex just yet as I have a really bad cold so am on paracetamols that have caffeine in them and feel hyper and whenever I am ill I always am a bit more anxious than usual so I shall get over this fluey type nusiance first. But at least I slept from 9pm till 3am last night, took a Lorazaepm pill and managed to drop back off till 6 but woke up having brain zaps, flushes and was really shakey so I am making an appointment to see the lady doctor on Friday to tell her I aren't ready to cut my Lorazepam down to just one pill a day yet as this cold is either making me anxious or because I only took half a Cipralex the first week or so could it be I am peaking at 5mg's adujsting to the dose side effect wise. And hopefully I'll settle down in the next few days again. I've been up and about a bit now and am alot more calm but still feel a bit like a jelly, ha ha ha! Even though I've just rang my Mum up who says the shaking might be symptoms of my fluey type thingy too.
I have to nip into the denitst today and sign some forms so William can get his molars sorted by a specialist. He was crying last night because he thinks he is having every tooth pulled and was wanting false teeth, bless him, ha ha! I eventually managed to explain he's only having his back teeth pulled because they have grown wrong so I promise he won't be Mr Gummy! lol! He's still got some pain but is on antibiotics and a stronger pain killer and pretty much ok so he's off back to school tomorrow and happily glued to the Simpsons right now and hopefully as the day progresses I'll calm down even more and stop wobbling like this big jelly, ha ha ha!
How's every one else doing????