Fear of Toilets

I have an embarrassing fear. One that I am able to cope with in small steps.

Ever since being a child I have a fear of toilets, particularly the black seated ones with high cisterns and a chain dangling down.

I am ok with toilets I 'get to know' so my home toilets, my mums toilet and my work toilets are all ok but any other toilet before I open the door I feel fear building up inside me as it swings open to reveal the monster with a gaping mouth! Its really silly but its genuine.

I dont even know if there is a name for this sort of fear.

One thing makes it worse, I have IBS and have the need to use the toilet many times a day..so I have to make sure there is a 'friendly' toilet on my route

Ive just noticed the toilet phobia thread on this page, but on reading it its not the same phobia...mine is less to do with needing to use one but actual fear of the toilet itself. My mum used to have to sit on the back of the toilet seat so I couldnt see the 'eyes' on the lid, while I perched on the edge.

Hi
All phobias are essentially irrational so yours isn't silly at all, it's just less common. People have fears of all sorts of things, I went to school with someone who had a phobia of milk!

Have you had any therapy for this? CBT can be very useful with phobias. I used to have agoraphobia and found a technique called graded exposure helped. This is where you face the fear and, in small steps, do the things you're scared of until you become desensitised.

Perhaps this would mean visiting different toilets for you? You might want to try a shopping centre on the high street or cafes etc. I also used to be terrified of lifts but I went to Primark where they only have a ground floor and first floor and went up and down in the lift there because I could get out if I needed to, since it didn't go very far. It was practically a cure for me, really, really helped.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by harasgenster

Hi
All phobias are essentially irrational so yours isn't silly at all, it's just less common. People have fears of all sorts of things, I went to school with someone who had a phobia of milk!

Have you had any therapy for this? CBT can be very useful with phobias. I used to have agoraphobia and found a technique called graded exposure helped. This is where you face the fear and, in small steps, do the things you're scared of until you become desensitised.

Perhaps this would mean visiting different toilets for you? You might want to try a shopping centre on the high street or cafes etc. I also used to be terrified of lifts but I went to Primark where they only have a ground floor and first floor and went up and down in the lift there because I could get out if I needed to, since it didn't go very far. It was practically a cure for me, really, really helped.

---

Hi

I am getting better than I was, as long as the toilets are modern and clean and of the indoor sort...the ones at old railway stations and parks still terrify me. Its the same feeling I get when spotting a spider!

Good.

What I would do in your position was try my best to go and sit on a toilet I was terrified of for as long as I could. Then do it every day.

Not easy to get the hang of but believe me it works!

:D

jfc I don't like public toilets either and will try to find one in a shop if necessary. I'm not phobic but most people have found toilets that are pretty grim. School toilets were the worst where the senior girls wanted you out asap because they wanted to smoke in them. They also climbed up and looked in! Train toilets are the worst and one toilet I had to walk out of as it was 'full' in Oulton Broad. My mum was often in the loo with us when I was little. I hated that but thankfully it did not make me phobic. Hypnosis might be of help to you? You could face the fear in a non threatening enviroment and then find ways to relax and deal with it. Best of luck. EJ.

I agree about train toilets ElizabethJane, they squash you up right next to the bowl so you cant escape when you open the door and they are often disgusting. I always hover about a scary toilet (So I can quickly pull my knickers up and run out if the toilet comes alive!!)...only joking but the thing is thats why I couldnt go to a hypnotist..its such a funny phobia.

I have more normal fears too...Im terrified of dogs, if a toy poodle on a lead was coming towards me with its owner, I would rush over to the otherside of the road and pretend I meant to cross over at that point, even if it meant taking a long detour getting to my destination. Spiders too, although that seems less as I am getting older, I used to know instinctively when one would appear, and sure enough I would open my eyes and there it would be with all 8 eyes looking at me...I then would have to stare back and not move in case it jumped or lunged at me...

This is a wonderful website and forum..such nice people x

Jfc I am not suggesting a hypnotist. I went to see a trained hypnotherapist for help with some of my problems. He is also a GP.

I have the same fear! I've also had this fear since I was a child and would really like to overcome it. It's more annoying for me than anything. I too have to 'get to know' a toilet before I am comfortable using it. I can not stand toilet's that automatically flush themselves. They terrify me. I had one flush while I was still using it. I've gotten to where I can actually go on one since they are so common in shopping centers, etc.. I just prefer not to. I even have occasional nightmares associated with toilets which is the reason I looked up 'toilet phobias' online. I can't imagine having IBS with this fear! That must be terrible!

Hi.

I have, since I was a little girl, suffered from anxiety of going to the toilet. Not as most, not being able to go, but to actually be near and of course especially on the toilet.
I don't feel ashamed about it, and I do tell most people around me, as it is something that is influent on my everyday-life.
It mostly appears when toilet that flush it self, hi-tech-toilets, small restrooms, as in flights (I can't stand the airplane-toilets!)..
So mostly, public toilets are my problem. And I hate it. I hate, that I can't just go when I have to. Sometimes I just hold the pee.. But because I have a small bladder and have to go quiet often, mostly I can't.

I live in Dubai, but my home country is Denmark, and we go home 2 times a year. That's 4 flights of 7 hours, maybe more, if not a direct flight. That means, that I sometimes have to pee most of the trip, but if it becomes very unpleasant, as in hurting and so, I go out to the toilet, just standing there, looking at the toilet, shaking, sweating, my heartbeat goes all the way up. Then I usually go back to my seat without peeing, but then I can't stand it, and does the same thing again. I feel as if I would pass out being in the toilets. After all, I pee, and when I have to again, I always use that exact same toilet. I will still be a mess, going in there the first couple of times, but I have to "trust" every single toilet.

Is there a treatment or some kind of help for this? I know I'm bad at english, and sorry for that, but I hope You understand, really. I can't live with this "condition" anymore.

I can't believe I'm not the only one petrified of victorian style toilets with very high cisterns and chains to flush! Is there an actual name for it? I have been petrified of them since the age of 6 and am now 34. I have no idea why, they were in my primary school and I don't recall any incident that would have caused it. Everyone I tell thinks it's hilarious, and to a point I do to, it's totally irrational. But every time I come across one (thankfully very rare) I get a hot numb/ prickly sensation throughout my body and feel like I can't move, even looking at a photo of one sends me into a panic. I don't know what I expect to happen when I'm around one either. I have had 100's of dreams about them over the years too, but nothing to reveal the actual cause of the phobia. I've no idea what I can do to get rid of this phobia, I've often thought of hypnosis but not tried it. Not sure it would actually help. And the thought of trying to face it bit by bit doesn't appeal either. If I'm out anywhere and unsure of what style of toilet is out there, I always send a trusted person in to do a check lol

Oh and I hate self flushing toilets too! Just read the other posts again, the thought of a self flushing victorian toilet would be enough to send me into a blind panic! I came across a self flushing 'normal' loo on a ferry once, didn't even know they existed until then, you never heard anyone scream so loud! I got some looks when I got back on the deck lol

I forgot to mention that an old lady my mother knew when I was a young child, used to have a normal low level toilet and she insisted on keeping the lid off the cistern, that completely freaked me out too and I always had mum with me as I would refuse to go otherwise. I don't think that helped me with my fear of high level cistern toilets either!

I too am terrified of high cistern toilets. My Mum tells me that when I was a little girl (about 2 or 3) we had a high cistern toilet.I can still remember it actually lol. My Mum said I would wee on the landing in the night as I was too scared to go to the toilet.

If I see one my heart beats like crazy and I cannot go near it.

I am so suprised to see others have the same phobia as me. Everyone else laughs at me.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by jfc

I have an embarrassing fear. One that I am able to cope with in small steps.

Ever since being a child I have a fear of toilets, particularly the black seated ones with high cisterns and a chain dangling down.

I am ok with toilets I 'get to know' so my home toilets, my mums toilet and my work toilets are all ok but any other toilet before I open the door I feel fear building up inside me as it swings open to reveal the monster with a gaping mouth! Its really silly but its genuine.

I dont even know if there is a name for this sort of fear.

One thing makes it worse, I have IBS and have the need to use the toilet many times a day..so I have to make sure there is a 'friendly' toilet on my route

Ive just noticed the toilet phobia thread on this page, but on reading it its not the same phobia...mine is less to do with needing to use one but actual fear of the toilet itself. My mum used to have to sit on the back of the toilet seat so I couldnt see the 'eyes' on the lid, while I perched on the edge.

---

You are not alone, please see my thread 'chain pull toilets'

You get a build up of fear when you see the toilet and it didn't help that the film 'carry on screaming' showed a man being shoved down the toilet. Thankfully they are being phased out but their are still some about. It's not silly, my aunt has a horrible one in the downstairs toilet and I never ever use it.

I know this is an old thread but I have just found it. I too am scared of the high cistern toilets and black seated ones especially. All toilets scare me unless I 'get to know them' like was said. I've recently discovered that most of my fears (like emetophobia and OCD) all centre around the fear of toilets! I too have nightmares about them!

Please add me to the list of "petrified of victorian style toilets with very high cisterns and chains to flush". There was one in my grandparents house & i always thought it was going to fall off the wall when i flushed it. I also hate self flushing toilets too. My other toilet paranoia is that they'll overflow.
What is it with this toilet thing??? I have "toilet dreams" as well - I'll be searching for a toilet because i need a wee but i cant find one anywhere. Sometimes (in my dream of course) i end up going in some very odd places. naturally i get paranoid i'll actually go in my sleep or that i'll wake up & it'll really be happening.

My toilet dreams are usually that I get stuck in the room. So not in the cubicle but in the room with all the cubicles. I also have at least 4 different toilets (again as in the rooms with all the cubicles not the actual toilet itself) that I frequently visit in my dreams. They petrify me. I just can't think of a reason why they would. I have OCD fear of contamination so it might have something to do with that. I'm just not sure if the fear of contamination comes from the fear of toilets or if it is the other way round!

Quote:

---

Please add me to the list of "petrified of victorian style toilets with very high cisterns and chains to flush". There was one in my grandparents house & i always thought it was going to fall off the wall when i flushed it.

---

I have exactly the same problem in my granddad's house! Big high up cistern that sounds like Niagra falls when you flush it and I'm sure one day the whole thing will explode off the wall.

I hate them aswell! The old style ones they scare the crap out of me. Even thinking about one makes me shiver. Eergh. Lol.

However if u think thats silly, i have a fear of dementia. It all began when i couldnt remember something. How ridiculous?! However its taking over my life because im convinced im going to forget people/places etc. i hate it

That's not a silly fear at all Charlee :) A lot of people have similar fears because the deep down root cause is fearing you will lose control, and this is often behind fears of dying, insanity and incapacitating illness. I can't a fear of losing control to toilets though unless you've got the runs XD

^^^^ lol, thats very true! Thanks for that. You made me smile

:D

Hi!

I'm someone who can actually say that most of the time, I've gotten over this. There used to be various different toilets that terrified me. I totally agree that the high cistern and chain ones are a nightmare. Especially my grandma's really noisy one. Also the ones that used to have more than 1/3 water in the bowl; as I child I was afraid I'd fall in, or as I didn't know how they worked, was afraid they'd overflow. Also the ones at school had the cistern above head height, and pipes from the cistern pointing over the toilet bowl, so I was always afraid of an imminent spewing of sewage as I was using it. On one occasion the pipe was pointing at me as I walked in and I froze and stopped breathing.

The way I got over it might not be a practical solution for everybody though!

How it happened with me was:

1) I went to Houston airport. Absolutely terrifying!! I don't know how seriously obese they were expecting people to be, but the toilets were **huge**!!! What's more I had just finished perching on the edge when I heard a rumbling in the distance, which got nearer and nearer and the toilet started flushing! I was so terrified I literally threw the toilet paper at the toilet and cowered in the corner, sweating, shaking like a leaf with my knees knocking together. When I came out the people I was with said how pale I looked but thankfullly attributed it to the altitude! After that, nothing ever seemed so bad...

2) I spent an extended period in South America. Here quite often a toilet was a hole in the ground, sometimes one in a slimy-sided cubicle that you needed to pay for the privelege of using. Some I had to pour the water down to flush, and many times taking the back of the cistern off and reaching in to fix it was needed, which I was quite apprehensive of, initially, I got to know how they worked, which helped a lot. Also, in Bolivia, there was a town toilet-bush, insufficiently large, that those who couldn't afford a slimy cubicle would use. So all in all, by the time I got back I was so grateful for a clean, shiny toilet that I could flush loo paper down that it rarely occurred to me to be afraid.

So while you can't necessarily do that, my advice would be take the back of one if you can, stick your hands in, lift things up and see what's connected to what. It's a bit like shining a light under the bed so you know there's no monsters there. Once you know how they work your rational mind can explain to the irrational part why nothing bad can happen. And like others have said, expose yourself to the fear as much as you feel able to, and if possible, give yourself a good scaring. When you survive you will know the thing you're afraid of wasn't that bad.

Hope that helps! :)

I just read through this thread and found it really interesting! I used to have such a phobia of toilets when I was little.. Caused because when I was 5 years old I used a toilet which flooded over while I was sitting on it!! Traumatic for a 5 year old! And the school toilets were disgusting which reinforced my avoidance of them.. Its gone now though, unless it's an old, dirty toilet.. Exposure to new and different toilets is the only way I got through that!

I'm so glad I'm not the only one that's afraid of toilets. So many people around me find my fear weird. I admit it sounds weird but I am. I'm afraid I'll clog a toilet, I'm afraid of the sounds they make especially if it's an unfamiliar toilet. I hate using the bathroom at school but sometimes it's unavoidable, the longer I avoid it, the worse it is when I have to go. Does anyone have any useful coping strategies? What I do currently is open the door, flush, then run out to a "safe place" as soon as I can. Help would be much appreciated

It's not a weird fear at all. I remember as a child being terrified of our Victorian high cistern toilet. It had such a powerful noisy flush it scared the hell out of me and the bowl was so large I feared I would fall in and be sucked away! I was late giving up the potty basically becaused that thing scared me to death! Even after flushing the noise as it refilled was deafening and seemed to go on for ages in alternating loud angry screechy bursts of water pressure.

I'm well over that one now, but still prefer toilets I know. Public toilets can be so grotty and private toilets in peoples houses can be another source of embarrassment. I hate having to number 2 at peoples houses in case something goes wrong, the flush doesn't work properly or I produce something that Niagara itself couldn't get rid of! I always remember at a friends house going in after another visitor and they'd left something in there that wasn't going anywhere and I thought 'oh hell, they'll think I'm responsible for that!' I was mortified!!!!! Another friends house had water pressure so low you had to wait ages inside for it to fill if you'd followed after someone. If you judged it wrongly and flushed too soon, you'd waste the water that had built up as it just trickled through and you'd have to wait for it to fill from the start again! You could end up stuck in there for ages wondering if people thought you were really ill or something. Nightmare!!! That's before I've even started on foul smells and germs etc.

I don't have a toilet phobia per se, but I dislike black seats intensely, especially older ones that look like they are contaminated with white stuff (on both sides) and the top side surface that often feels a bit textured like blunt sandpaper.

I hated the downstairs toilet in the house we lived in when I was a little boy between the age of 1 1/2 and 7 3/4 as not only did it sport a black seat (it was a council house when and where in those days black toilet seats were pretty much de-rigueur) and the (low-level) cistern used to emit a horrible creepy whirring sound during its refill cycle. All the pipework in said toilet was exposed, which I felt a bit creeped out by when sat perched on the loo alone at the age of 2-3 years old and surrounded by them, as parents didn't seem to supervise their little ones as much some 40 years ago to the extent that they do today, though I came to no actual physical harm. From about the age of 4 onwards I always insisted in using the upstairs toilet in said house whose pan, seat and cistern were absolutely identical to the one downstairs, but almost all of the pipework in the bathroom upstairs was hidden behind ducts and underneath the floorboards, and of course, the upstairs toilet in the bathroom was much lighter due to the large-ish window, more spacious and less enclosed. Also the sound of the cistern refill was much quieter and less scary than that of the downstairs toilet.

Everyone's got something they are afraid of, I'm not afraid of toilets but have my own fears :hugs:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Lencoboy

I don't have a toilet phobia per se, but I dislike black seats intensely, especially older ones that look like they are contaminated with white stuff (on both sides) and the top side surface that often feels a bit textured like blunt sandpaper.

---

Sounds like the old black Bakelite seats; the Bakelite was mixed with a much coarser filler.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Pamplemousse

Sounds like the old black Bakelite seats; the Bakelite was mixed with a much coarser filler.

---

Perhaps all plastic toilets seats (not just black) manufactured today are specially treated with an anti-fungal solution during production.

Those 'open-front' type toilet seats (that kind of resemble a horseshoe shape) also used to freak me out as a little kid, as they were installed on the childrens' toilets at the local nursery I attended when I was 3. It was mainly the look and shape of them that gave me the heebies as they obviously looked odd and unusual, particularly to a little 'un like me at the time. I often used to have nightmares about them during that same time period (late 1980-early 1981). Fortunately I never needed to do a number 2 whilst at said nursery. Also, I don't think a lot of anxieties that children had (especially the more trivial ones) were particularly well understood back then, as such children were often ridiculed and mocked by their parents, teachers, etc and told to grow up and stop being so stupid. In fact, one of the teachers at a primary school I attended back in 1982-83 had the temerity to call me a 'poof' due to my fear of using a specific toilet block in the school that had no windows and the other boys often used to fool around in there turning the light on and off and never seemed to get reprimanded by staff for it, it was always me that seemed to cop it for my being fearful of using said toilet block.

I then moved to an Educational Assessment Centre in the autumn of 1983 as I had many other 'issues' at the time. Soon after I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome and then moved to a residential school in early 1986 (more on this in another thread) and used to come home for weekends and school holidays.

The UK's foremost sanitaryware manufacturer Armitage Shanks, offer a range of plastic toilet seats under the trademarked name 'Bakasan'. Not sure if this is related to Bakelite or if it is just a special manufacturing process that protects against bacteria, fungi, etc. I think that range of seats is probably aimed at the 'commercial' sector, as they include both 'open-front' and conventional 'solid-front' types, and are available in multiple colours (I think).

Fascinating, Lencoboy thank you. The old radio manufacturer E.K.Cole ('Ekco') invested heavily in Bakelite presses in the 1930s and were most famous for making a range of circular-bodied radio sets. To maximise the revenue from this investment, they used to make toilet seats as well. I believe some plastic materials used to make socket outlets nowadays are naturally anti-bacterial?

It seems unbelievable now to read about what teachers used to get away with back in the 70s and 80s in terms of both verbal and physical abuse towards pupils, isn't it?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Pamplemousse

Fascinating, Lencoboy thank you. The old radio manufacturer E.K.Cole ('Ekco') invested heavily in Bakelite presses in the 1930s and were most famous for making a range of circular-bodied radio sets. To maximise the revenue from this investment, they used to make toilet seats as well. I believe some plastic materials used to make socket outlets nowadays are naturally anti-bacterial?

It seems unbelievable now to read about what teachers used to get away with back in the 70s and 80s in terms of both verbal and physical abuse towards pupils, isn't it?

---

Most certainly, Pamplemouse.

What I really find disturbing is those who seem to boast about their childhood brutality from both their parents and teachers and come out with the same old same old 'It never did me any harm' mantra, and the usual 'kids today...' stuff. I also feel that far too much emphasis (both in terms of media attention and general everyday conversation) is placed on badly behaved kids and the good kids who do many great things for both their schools and local communities as a whole, barely ever seem to get acknowledged and seem to be lost in the ether of endless tales of the no-gooders, and their turning schools into anarchic, dysfunctional hellholes.

Yes, kids need discipline by all means, but not full-on brutality that was reportedly commonplace prior to 1986, when CP was outlawed from all state-run schools in the UK.

Back to toilets, the state of boys' and girls' facilities in a lot of schools pretty much up until I left full-time education in July 1993 would probably traumatise a great proportion of today's youngsters. Especially the 'outside' blocks and not forgetting those Izal toilet rolls that resembled tracing paper!!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Tyke

It's not a weird fear at all. I remember as a child being terrified of our Victorian high cistern toilet. It had such a powerful noisy flush it scared the hell out of me and the bowl was so large I feared I would fall in and be sucked away! I was late giving up the potty basically becaused that thing scared me to death! Even after flushing the noise as it refilled was deafening and seemed to go on for ages in alternating loud angry screechy bursts of water pressure.

I'm well over that one now, but still prefer toilets I know. Public toilets can be so grotty and private toilets in peoples houses can be another source of embarrassment. I hate having to number 2 at peoples houses in case something goes wrong, the flush doesn't work properly or I produce something that Niagara itself couldn't get rid of! I always remember at a friends house going in after another visitor and they'd left something in there that wasn't going anywhere and I thought 'oh hell, they'll think I'm responsible for that!' I was mortified!!!!! Another friends house had water pressure so low you had to wait ages inside for it to fill if you'd followed after someone. If you judged it wrongly and flushed too soon, you'd waste the water that had built up as it just trickled through and you'd have to wait for it to fill from the start again! You could end up stuck in there for ages wondering if people thought you were really ill or something. Nightmare!!! That's before I've even started on foul smells and germs etc.

---

Funnily enough I was dreaming last night about the toilet in my paternal grandparents' old house in Birmingham last night.

The toilet in that house had a high level cistern as said house was built in the early 50s when toilets with high level cisterns were still the norm, and I remember that cistern used to produce a terrifying din during the refill cycle that resonated through the pipes in the kitchen underneath.

Older toilets, especially pre-70s ones, have always given me the creeps a bit, even though it became more common to have low level cisterns on toilets during the 60s and beyond.

Even worse if they have manky black plastic seats whose top surfaces are corroded and like sitting on sandpaper!

But the cistern refill noises don't really bother me anymore, especially as almost all of the toilets within my usual day-to-day routine (at home, my day centre, etc) are fairly modern and seem to be much quieter than those in most older installations.