Severe anxiety every day causing depression

I have been dealing with anxiety all my life but since the death of my dad 17 years ago it has developed into health anxiety. I am obsessed with my fear of cancer and feel it’s just a matter of time before I am diagnosed with some form of cancer, to me I’m almost certain it will be bowel cancer.

Everyday I have to put on an act in front of my kids and it’s exhausting me. I haven’t felt happy in years and I am merely existing day to day. Every morning I have wave after wave of anxiety washing over me, it’s awful. I’m obsessed with my bowel movements and don’t know how to stop. I am on a waiting list for psychotherapy, a year long waiting list! If it wasn’t for my kids I honestly wouldn’t want to go on, this is no life at all.

Your comment about having to put on an act in front of the kids really resonates with me.. so tiring.

I have been there with the bowel worries and if I ever get over my current worry I’m sure I’ll be back.

I can’t offer advice because I’ve tried all sorts of therapies and nothing works for me.. but hopefully something will for you.

This is not life, this is just existing and I’m sorry you are the same

I'm sorry you are both feeling unwell. I hope things improve. I also am just existing like a lifeless cadaver.

Hi

Sorry you all feel the exact same way I do x

Just read these earlier posts and had to reply.H/a really is exhausting,you feel like a stranger in the real World,everyone seems ok but you.
I have also tried cbt,psychotherapy,acupuncture,mindfulness,and more but to no success.That does not mean others should not try them they may work.
I would give any amount of money not to feel like this.I never feel happy any more,one symptom can jump to another in an instant,like a frog on lily pads.
Does anyone else feel like this?
[by the way i am male my wife put the name Sheena the name of our dog on the registration] lol
Had loads of blood tests all ok,still not happy,should be over the Moon.
Best wishes to all,just wish i could be of some help

I'm going through this too. My sadness and anxiety have been really bad. Being bullied at my job just makes it worse. I've been questioning the reason for my existence. It's really tough I know.

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Hi Idickerson
so sorry you feel this way too,plus being bullied at work must be awful.I do get what you mean by the reason for you existence,when everyone else seems to be ok but you.
I also had some hard times at work,and it plays on your mind.So that you do not want to face the day.
How is your health anxiety affecting you?Do you see your doctor a lot or go to e r with illnesses.?

No I just basically deal with the panic attacks. I stopped taking my meds because they weren't doing anything anymore.

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