What Happened!

God...
Firstly just want to thank everyone for replying to my PLAN in getting the girl, unfortunately, it all went down the toilet, i didnt get rejected, i just had real real bad luck getting the chance!

What happened isi went to lesson hoping to talk to her, but she turned up BANG on the dot, so i couldnt get a chance to sit by her and talk to her! Near the end of the lesson, i was psyched up into asking her out. When i say i was going to stand at the top of the stairs and shout it, really i was hoping that nobody else would be around because its a quiet spot - i thought the distance thing would do the trick.

So what happened?
Well, i could feel the opportunity slipping between my fingers. All my mates were around talking to me at the end AND i didnt want them to see me asking her out, so i found it very hard to leave the room.... but i did, after she left. I looked down the stairs and realised she had gone! Dissapeared into thin air!!
I was gutted so told me mate i was going for a slash, so i turned round and walked into the toilets ONLY TO FIND IT WAS THE GIRLS TOILETS and she was in there washing her hands!

OMG, can't beleive i did that! Its because the gents and ladies bogs are almost identical, just on separate floors. The gents is above the ladies and because i have most of my lessons upstairs i just naturally wandered into the ladies without even thinking about it!

She saw the funny side but how the hell could i ask her out after that??? It almost looked like i followed her in!! Dam!!!!! How did it end like this?

I went home feeling like a real failure because I STILL DON'T know and its killing me inside, i cant get rid of her face from my mind. I dont know if it is a good or bad thing me walking into the toilets, at least its given her something funny to think about? And i can joke with her about it next time i see her? I mean,,,, i wasnt rejected, i guess i have another chance??

But i still feel really bad about this crush, its getting me down, i cant wait another week to see her. I went out clubbing last night and couldnt even look at any other girls. My anxiety has really turned this small crush into something massive, im feeling insecure and worried.....

Please, someone, just tell me what you think of all that??

Many thanks.

Sounds like you have had quite a trying day!!

How embarrassing for you- but it is good she could see the funny side!! You're right though, that wasn't the right time to ask her- but at least the ice is somewhat broken now, might make talking to her a little easier for you next time.

Crushs are a pain, aren't they? It's the not knowing that's the problem, and right now you still don't know, so, of course, you get another chance! Don't worry about it being right or perfect or whatever... just do it when it is most appropriate- and you were right to try and do that a way from your mates.

Keep your chin up- when do you think you will get the chance again? I hope you get to ask her soon, so that you can either get together and be happy, or realise it won't work and start getting over her and move on.

Good luck- and if I was her, I'd think more of you now for that incident- adds a bit of lightheartedness to it all!!

Hannah x

"I just wanna live my life sedated, cos I love driving myself away"

Thanks for the advice!

I just dont know what is wrong with me, i can't get her out of my mind, i wish i could just forget about her completely, i feel obsessed! Its getting me down knowing i can't handle having feelings for someone. Last week i felt so confident, so unstoppable, like i could have any girl.
Now, in just 3 days because i havent been successful with the girl that really matters to me, i feel insecure, and anxious.

I also fear that i will never meet another girl as special as she is.

Dam anxiety, dam depression, its making me feel like this girl is the most important thing in my life, all i've got to live for.
I've totally lost sense of myself.

You're OK.

Deep breaths. There will be plenty others like this girl, even if you can't see it or feel it right now.

In a sense you are both fortunate and unfortunate in the that you can ask this girl out. Fortunate in that you will one day and maybe get what you want.. but also unfortunate in that sense it is a risk. However, what is meant to happen will- and either way she will fade from significance with time, even if you get her, you will view her differently, and if you don't you will move on.

I have every faith.

You still can have any girl in the sense you were feeling last week, you just have to try and minimise her in your imagination somewhat- she won't be as perfect as you imagine in a relationship- noone ever is, but you will ultimately be happy whatever happens, because it will be right. I know that doesn't sound like much right now- but hopefully it will make more sense when you know what is going on.

All the best,

Hannah x

"I just wanna live my life sedated, cos I love driving myself away"

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Dam anxiety, dam depression, its making me feel like this girl is the most important thing in my life, all i've got to live for.
I've totally lost sense of myself.
<div align="right">Originally posted by Piscian Daydreamer - 28 April 2006 : 22:30:41</div id="right">
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Hi there,

I don't actually think it's necessarily anxiety or depression making you feel like this, it's actually quite normal to feel that way when you have a crush on someone, so don't blame yourself or be too hard on yourself.
Many people have felt like you do. I certainly did as a teenager and in my early twenties and I was never anxious back then, it's just natural to feel this way and then think of that person all the time. Either way you do get over it and then will like someone else. Or who knows you may get together with her. I have several times thought I'd never like anyone else as much as certain people but you do in time.

You still have a chance to ask her out, all is not lost.

Good luck,

Lisa

I know this might sound a bit silly but you could always slip her a note asking her to either meet you somewhere after class or to give you a couple of minutes of her time straight after class the chances are that her female curiosity will ensure that she will do it. If she shows up and you ask her out and she says yes well bingo, if she says no then at least you will know if she shows it to her mates and has a laff at you then she is not the girl you thought she was and you have had a lucky escape, the chances are regardles of whether she says yes or no, she wont tell anyone as she will probably think it quite romantic i know i would have,you could always make a joke out of it and say meet me in the girls loos after class, lol, let us know how you get on,nothing ventured nothing gained.

I just want my life back
nell
x

Thanks once again for your interest and advice, you really don't know how valuable your opinions are to me.

This girl isn't even that spectacularly good looking, she doesnt put any make up on or make no effort,,, but thats what i like about her - she's so strong, confident and intelligent - its her personality i love.
I really want to get to know her properly but there just arent many chances or a lot of time. She even lives quite far away from me in Stafford and i live in Brum which makes things even more tricky.

I guess i have to wait until next week to see her, even then i am not guaranteed interaction - the whole course is messed up and unorganised.