sense of self?

I feel like I am not a real person and a bit scared. like not having boundaries. I am kinda ugly (as a child people said this non-maliciously, saying I am a good friend lol!) but I know it's nothing shameful to be but feel like people will be disgusted if I talk. I feel real sometimes. I think my health anxiety brings it out also, also making it harder to exercise and hike/ be healthy.
I tend to wish I was like other people around me who are: pretty, creative, comfortable being alone, not bitter or seeming cruel, and not myself, not really because I hate myself but I wish to be someone... to have a sense of self. I think also that religion could help this rather than hinder. But I would be religious in any situation I think
I am a student and I like my degree, it's rly wonderful... but I have no friends, I used to draw and write as a child but not really anymore, although I do sometimes and it's really nice, maybe I feel the need less tho.
people are so kind and I want to give back but at the same time I don't make any effort to befriend people when there is an opportunity, Ive been alone so long I don't know what I'd do but I know I need to start speaking in some way. it is just the fear of people being disgusted
I wonder if everybody feels the same? sometimes I think it is so... and just need to learn how to respond and act better hehe..
thank u for any response so much

Did you not read my reply about keeping all your issues to one post for now?

But I feel like u would give similar advice for both things... but am looking for short-term support and reassurance from people who are experiencing something in similar category, and because hypochondria and this are distinct problems I thought should separate them so as not to detract from their separate properties n things... hope I am not so rude : ( only wish 2 explain

Fear of rejection and feeling gross are big issues for me too. I've spent most of my life alone and find it hard to connect with people, even when I'm trying to.
I don't have hypochondria personally so I wouldn't know what to really suggest with that but when it comes to feeling insignificant etc I'd say a good way forward is to be kind to yourself. Don't call yourself stupid, let yourself make mistakes without judging your character etc
Its baby steps for me, I struggle with this but I've found being nicer to myself has really helped.