Dating With Anxiety

I have been single for 5 years now and I took a plunge and decided to go on a dating website to try to meet someone. I was speaking to this guy who sounds great, we had a lot of similar interests and after speaking for a couple of weeks by text he asked me out on a date. I really wanted to go for it but my anxiety has completely taken over me in recent weeks and I had to say no. I felt like a complete idiot because I've had to be honest and tell him what I'm going through and just explained it's not fair to him, I don't know how I'm going to feel on the day, I don't want to have to cancel etc.

I don't just have social anxiety. I also have a bit of agoraphobia & hypochondria and I can't even go to work lately without having a panic attack so how can I go on a first date?!

I'm gutted and I wish I could have found the strength to take the opportunity and have just gone for it, and now I feel like a plonker :weep: and he probably thinks I'm lying lol.

I think I need to work on myself and my confidence a bit more first and then I really need to start taking these chances. Everyone gets nerves it's understandable I just need to learn to control mine. I'd hate to have a full blown panic attack before or during a date especially when I'm not close to home or with a friend.

How do you guys cope with dating with anxiety/panic disorder? I've only been in one relationship before, it lasts 4 years, ended pretty badly and I've been single ever since :roflmao: I'd like to meet someone but it just seems so difficult right now! :lac:

Hi Personally for now I would concerntraiting on making a circle of understanding friends much less complicated than having a relationship. I know I am not ready for one so am doing just that it's on the back burner for now and getting to know new people as friends is far easier (to me) than getting a relationship. It's all down to what you are after. HTH ATB

In a similar situation as you I've talked to a few people but when it actually comes to meeting up the anxiety takes over lol.

On the few occasions I did manage to take a girl out it was in my home town so I knew my surroundings so it wasn't so bad so maybe if you ask to meet him more local to you it might be easier :)

I get very bad anxiety and panic attacks every day and I had to stop work as it's really hard to cope with. I'm trying so hard to not go down the tablet route because of side effects but it's really hard! Going out in busy places I hate and try to avoid.

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Originally Posted by Hayley2

I get very bad anxiety and panic attacks every day and I had to stop work as it's really hard to cope with. I'm trying so hard to not go down the tablet route because of side effects but it's really hard! Going out in busy places I hate and try to avoid.

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Hi Well you don't have to go down the meds route you could try therapy instead ;) ATB

Thank you so much for your reply. This is the first time I've logged onto this site in a while, just out of curiosity. Panic no longer controls my life, and I'm in a very happy relationship and we own our dream house together, so since 3 years ago when I posted this things dramatically changed for the best, and I wanted to pop this here so anyone viewing the forum knows that it will get better for them :)

That's excellent news!

I now have my husband. We got married last year and our date life wasn't easy. We have fights that is usually caused by my brain and thoughts. I'm always afraid that we might end up like others that he might leave me anytime but it went smoother when I told him about my situation and mental health. We started off as friends so I'm not sure how dating is if you will date someone whom you are not familiar with yet.