Golf, Photography and a Caring Friend

Hey all,

I just want to report some success. Amid the current situation with COVID, Anxiety, low moods etc. I've found some solace. Recently I've been seeing the fruits of me seeds blossom.

Once a week my next door neighbor will get me out of the house. He'll take off on a long walk through the woods, and fields, until we arrive at the golf course. It's a good distance from my home. I feel comfortable with him. He knows my mental health struggles, and I know his. We've done Youtube videos together and will continue to do so. We make a great team.

The first time he did this I was skeptical, nervous etc. The agoraphobia was pulling me indoors. I said no to him the first time and he just wouldn't take no for an answer so he waited outside until I said yes. I'd never played golf and the long walk was worrying. But, once I arrived at the golf course I was calm. We spent some time in the driving range and he taught me how to hit a ball.

At the same time my brother had loaned me his DSLR. I took the camera with me and started taking shots and learning how to use it. On the walk to the course and back I took a lot of pictures. Before I knew it so much time had passed and I was having fun! The next day was brutal. Golf pulls all sorts of muscles in your upper regions :roflmao:

From this I started going with my partner for walks in the woods. I'd again take the camera.

I loved the camera so much and it was getting me out of the house doing something I loved. My mom decided to purchase a Cannon EOS 2000D. So now I have my own and I can get adventurous with the shots.

I've been out today back up the golf course. I spent some time on the driving range and excelled. Keep in mind I've only played golf a handful of times. I was hitting targets my friend couldn't even hit and he's been playing for a long time. He said I was a natural and I need to seriously consider getting a golf set and playing more. He thinks I could do well. Maybe he was just saying things to make me happy? There is something sweeeeet when you connect with the ball and your shot hits the target. It's a feeling I can't explain, but a good one.

So yeah, this lockdown has been more positive for me than it has been negative. I feel my mental health is improving. Of course I'm going to have ups and downs but the downs don't need to ruin my day and these experiences are teaching me that I can battle through anxiety. Even today the anxiety was bad, but I could hold my composure long enough to ignore it and let it pass. The more I have these experiences away from home the easier they are to deal with.

I arrived at the golf course sweating. The heat here is so bad. My heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest. I didn't even stop to take my pulse. Ignored it, carried on. And this kept happening often, but I would quickly brush it aside.

I've waited for the day I can actually post something meaningful here and today is my day :)

Ps. Last year during summer I was a milk bottle color. This year I'm brown all over.

Try and be a little pragmatic about this. It's very hard being cooped up in a house with somebody that suffers with mental health problems, and she has been caring for you for a long time, through some pretty heavy stuff right?

She has a point, albeit badly made and badly timed. They are your family and want to share in the fruits of your success, so why are you succeeding with the bloke next door? That's ONE way of looking at it.

You can get your pats on the back here, because you should be proud of your success, just try and see it from their point of view too. There is no right or wrong here, it's just perception and feelings.

Thank's Joe.

Odd this friend doesn't even speak to me anymore. Lives next door, I see him all the time and doesn't even say "alright mate". This is why I don't like friendship relationships. They're odd lmao.