Terrified of going back to office - pls help

So I'm starting a new job in about three weeks' time, and they want me to be office based "at least most of the time".

Since March 2020, I've been working from home but, not only that, I've been keeping myself at home because I have really bad anxiety around catching covid. I haven't done anything - not been to a cafe, a restaurant, anything for 18 months. If I go to a shop, I'm quickly in and out and of course wear a mask and go straight home etc. On the rare occasion I see a friend it's always outside.

I honestly don't know how I'm going to cope with being in an office for 8+ hours with other people everyday. Even before Covid, I would hate it if anyone came into work ill and would go to great lengths not to catch their illness. What if my new colleagues don't open windows? What if they come in ill? What if the place isn't cleaned properly?

It makes me angry that I'm told to go to the office when I could do the job from home. I guess employers have to justify their building costs?!

One person suggest I build up my tolerance by mixing with people beforehand, but how can Iogically do that when infections are increasing and our country is effectively a giant petri dish right now?

I've just had my second vaccination so at least I'll have some protection, but I'm still losing sleep over worrying.

Many thanks for reading all this. I just have no one to talk to and right now I feel like quitting my new job before I've even started.

This is a tough one. We’re in reopening stages here too and it’s difficult to deal with reopening anxiety.

There are a few things you can do potentially that might help:

1. Ask about your work’s COVID safety plans. How are they screening? What are their masking/distancing rules in the office? How are they dealing with clients/the public? If you have Health & Safety concerns, voice them. If your H&S legislation is anything like ours, it’s your employer’s obligation to reassure you or change their protocols if required.
2. Explain your anxiety and see if they will opt for a hybrid model with scheduled days in and scheduled days from home. If expectations are clear, that may help both of you.
3. Remember you are vaccinated, which will protect you from the worst of COVID. But also have a plan in place for testing and isolation if you get symptoms. Sometimes having a clear plan in place for yourself helps with that worst-case scenario panic.
4. Have your going to work kit ready and well stocked with masks, hand sanitizer, and anything else that will help you feel better about going into the world.

Remember that this anxiety is normal and expected as our brains adapt yet again to a new normal. I read somewhere it’s like we’ve all been waking through a field and trampling the same path of grass all this time. When we create a new path it’s difficult at first, but as we trample new grass it gets easier and the old grass will grow back.

Personally, I’ve found a few controlled in-person meetings has helped me greatly. I’m always nervous before going to them, but I do feel better after each one.

Good luck with things. Take it slow, and be gentle with yourself.

Hi ClipClop,

I don't have any words of advice for you but I totally understand. Our local cases are skyrocketing - there was an article that we are being recognized as an emerging hot spot. My state (US) is only about 40% vaccinated and it's likely going to stay there as vaccines are available, people just don't want them. I am vaccinated, but we are expected to start going back to the office in early August and be pretty much set up back there by the end of August. I have coworkers who are going to do some remote work, but as I am an administrative assistant I think I am expected to be there. I am honestly starting to look into other jobs with better pay and the option to be remote because after working at home for a year going back is difficult.

Good luck with your new job and hopefully they take your concerns seriously!

Thank you so very much for your replies. I went to the new office for an invited lookaround before I start, and unfortunately it wasn't good. Absolutely no covid measures at all - crowded offices, no windows open, no masks, shared desks - someone was even openly coughing away.

I decided to tell my new boss about my anxiety and to ask if I could work in a less crowded office, he immediately refused and when I asked if they open windows, he said they don't because "it makes the room cold" (it's summer!).

I was terribly polite in my asking but he basically asked me if I "needed to reconsider my position". I was absolutely shocked. He said that everywhere had opened up now and life goes on.

So, unfortunately, I'm now in a position where I have to tolerate extreme anxiety or face unemployment?

I can't sleep with worrying. I don't know what to do. I know everyone seems to just be getting on with everything now, but to not even open a window is surely just negligent?

That’s awful! Are they in the UK?

I had anxiety about going back to my office but they are VERY good at making it covid secure and following the guidelines.
We all test twice a week, use hand sanitizer almost constantly, sit 1.5m apart, have screens between the desks, windows open, practice social distancing.
I’m actually happier working in the office than I was at home. I still don’t want to work their every day, but that’s more a lifestyle choice.

I would think about what you want to do. Consider contacting the HR department or whoever offered you the role and ask them what their covid strategy is. But despite everything, he sounds like a bit of a problem as a boss.


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Quite frankly ClipClop, their attitude stinks which makes me wonder what the rest of their HR practices are like. I'd start looking for another job immediately.

By contrast, my workplace is keeping all Covid measures in place until *at least* September and I suspect the jobs that are easily done from home will remain that way as a new "green" initiative, to save on commuting miles.

This is an interesting topic and on the minds of many recently. I started a new job earlier this month. I've been in training on site. When I started there were signs everywhere encouraging social distancing and masks were 'optional' if you were vaxxed (had to show proof). The facility has a health center and offers free vaccines as well. Yesterday, word came down from the top that due to the CDC announcement and concerns about the Delta variant, masks will now be 'required' any time you're not at your station or office. They also have sanitizer stations and wipes distributed throughout the building. The work stations have been designated and marked so that those working in the facility are properly social distanced. It was also announced that you must be vaccinated if you want to return to the facility. I applaud their concern and actions. I've felt very comfortable and safe there. While I will most likely be working remote once I finish training, there are options to work in the facility or do a hybrid, working half and half from home or on site.

There are several companies that announced similar rules recently.

FMP