Just wanted to introduce myself.. Again

Good afternoon everyone. I have been a member on NMP for quite some time but became inactive as I got pregnant and had a baby.. Who is now 4 years old!

My MH history are Health Anxiety and Generalised Anxiety Disorder, also a bit of OCD in there too. HA is the worse for me, I am a serial Googler and always think the worse. I post topics on loads of forums to get reassurance, however there's always a but.. It COULD be the C word. Every symptom means it is the end for me. I am very fearful of death because I've seen so many of my family members dying unexpectedly.

I get very wound up, for example if I put too much washing powder in the wash, I have to rewash all the clothes again because the strong smell irritates my nasal passages, but for my husband it doesn't bother him. If someone at work used the same mop to bleach with, I would have to throw it away and use a new one because I am scared of using bleach / mixing chemicals. If I cut myself, I think I am going to get sepsis, or if bang my head, I am scared of having a brain bleed. If I go 2mph over the limit on a 30mph zone, I am panicking and very irate for the next 2w, waiting for a penalty letter. When letters do come through, my heart races fast thinking that I am going to get in deep trouble. These things are always on my mind, and I can never forget them.

I hold my breath if I sense any odd smell or fumes because I'm terrified that if I breathe it in, it will affect my lungs and my breathing. I pace up and down, holding my chest and looking dazed, my hubby always tells me to sit down and relax but I can't as my mind is in overdrive. The cleaning, washing, everything else gets left because I am too focused on this awful anxiety going through my head.

When I get a headache, I knock my head several times to try and stop it. It doesn't obviously work. I've approached the GP many times, have had several counselling sessions, but I think I will be like this for the rest of my days. I'm getting a smear done next week and already showing symptoms of the C word so that has messed my head up big time.

Sorry I've rambled on but you'll most likely see a lot of my future posts and threads over the HA section as that's the area that most affects me.

Hiya Anxietysufferer92 and welcome to NMP :welcome:

Why not take a look at our articles on our home page, they contain a wealth of information and
are a great starting place for your time on the forum.

I hope you find the as site helpful and informative as I have and that you get the help and
support you need here and hope that you meet a few friends along the way :yesyes:

Hi!

First things first, the word is cancer. No capital letters, no abbreviations. It's an overgrowth of cells that can be dangerous, or even fatal. As horrible as it is, though, it's not some sort of fairytale monster, so don't go giving it a power in your life that it doesn't deserve.

it is nice to meet you.

pretty new myself (my second day on the forums)

honestly I like it. I hope you do too

x