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After my last therapist didn’t help I’ve found this free class online and I want to try it but my mind scares me and tells me if I finally feel free after years of anxiety that I’ll die or get a disease. I know it sounds stupid but I’m used to this suffering for 17 years now and the thought of not worrying is scary. I want to sign up but I’m really anxious
Part of anxiety is it's need to safe itself from extinction since it was always designed to be a process to keep us safe from harm. So when it latches onto irrational fears it applies the same self preservation techniques as it would to keep us aware that snarling bears are always to be avoided.
You know it can't actually harm you, it can only make you feel bad due to symptoms. So, why not give it a try and see how you go? Don't it this treatment a "have" or "must do", tell yourself you "choose" to do this as that implies choice hence less pressure than a firm commitment.
I completely get this.
I have bad HA anyway.