T cell lymphoma? Please help!

I usually ramble and don’t want to in this case so I’ll try to cut right to the chase. In March I noticed a grape sized hard lump at the back of my neck on one side at my hairline. I looked at it and saw some redness under the hair in the middle. I shaved that area of hair off to get a better look and saw it was a pinkish red patch that is smooth and sort of feels waxy but doesn’t seem scaly. There are small white spots that almost look like scar tissue and feel mildly bumpy but no crust or peeling or anything. It’s mostly smooth and not painful. Sometimes I barely see it, almost like it’s gone and sometimes it’s quite pink. I do have an itchy head and behind my ears, down back of my neck but it comes and goes and isn’t incessant, and not severe. . I take very hot baths where my neck is up against the hard back of my tub, but I’ve been doing that for ages. I did start wearing wigs in February and they had a comb that dig into my neck a bit but I wouldn’t think this would last that long if it was because of that. No other symptoms other than fatigue but I’ve had that chronically for years. Has anyone else ever had anything like this? I’ve included two photos - one right after the shave and one an hour later. You can see the difference, the redness greatly reduced and shrunk, but there is still that one patch, so I'm worried that while the shaving did irritate it, there's something else that's wrong in the first place. I try to tell myself that cancer doesn't behave this way, but I can't get it out of my head that even though it does appear better now, there's still that patch there. I looked at some photos of t-cell and some of them look much milder than this so I am really freaked out. I know, that's terrible OCD behaviour. I also know some of you will remember me and probably be annoyed with this post. I don't blame you - I'm annoyed with myself. I suffer from PTSD, anxiety, health anxiety, depression and agoraphobia. I'm currently trying to find the right medication and working with a therapist. I'm also going through an awful separation that is leading to a divorce - I was with my husband for 13 years and we have a child. It's been really panful adjusting to being alone, especially because my level of self isolation due to mental health is really intense. And sharing my daughter, having to have her and then hand her over to him, has ben excruciating. y dad was diagnosed with follicular lymphoma last spring and since then lymphoma has been a huge fear.

The photo is from today after i retouched the shaving job to see better. I wish it was better quality but I have to take it in a mirror. I have very sensitive skin so it’s extra pink right now form the shaving. It kind of comes and goes but never fully goes, gets really bright then sort of fades. The shaving did not cause this, the rash was there before the shave. I shaved because of the rash. I’m really terrified of T cell lymphoma because this has been there for like almost two months and I don’t think that’s normal. I also read that this type of lymphoma is really bad and can take years to be found out. I can’t see my doctor until I get my vaccine next week, because of extreme covid anxiety, so was hoping to get some help from the forum before then if possible. I’m really terrified as it seems consistent with T cell and I’m basically doomed if that’s the case. I haven’t had blood work done in a few years and so I’m terrified this has gone undetected. Is there any chance that in the span of almost two months, if the rash was there and it was T cell, I would be quite ill by now? By the way, I am in CBT but it is slow going because my therapist can only see me once every two weeks. I feel consumed by this and am very frightened. My grandfather had psoriasis and I think my brother might have eczema but am not sure. But this feels sinister because it has hung around so long. And yes, I know nobody can diagnose me but am just wondering if anyone has had something like this that was nothing bad. Note that the tiny red blood dots in the image are from the shaving that I had just done, as are the blotches on the upper right side of the photos, they weren't there before I shaved, and again, the rash does fade to a much lighter/less intense colour and get brighter/more prevalent at times. Sorry if photos are frowned upon - I see that there is a spot to include them and assumed that it's okay to otherwise it probably wouldn't be there, but I'm truly sorry if it's the wrong thing to do.

Hi,

I don’t have experience and I honestly don’t really know much (or anything) about what you’re talking about. But I do know that touching it a lot will possibly make it worse. It’s highly unlikely you have anything other than irritated skin, but if it’s bothering you then seek medical advice.

I’m sorry you have been through tough times. I hope you get some help soon.

X


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Originally Posted by Shadyboo

I usually ramble and don’t want to in this case so I’ll try to cut right to the chase.

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Oh goodness THIS was cutting to the chase? lol

Sounds to me like you've got an irritated spot that you have not left alone and you've spun yourself into a tizzy by googling.

You should know nothing about T cell lymphoma unless you have been medically diagnosed.

How about getting a proper diagnosis ?

Yes, for me that was cutting to the chase. I am a writer by profession. So yes, I am wordy - thanks for pointing it out. I can’t see my doctor for another two weeks so I was posting to see if anyone has ever had anything like this that turned out to be nothing. Thanks for your input.

Scass, thank you very much for your kind words

I’m sorry I don’t have any more advice for you other than what I posted on your previous thread. But I just wanted to say I’m glad you’ve finally made that doctors appointment! This is a great first step to get you over the fear hurdle. Wishing you the best!

Anyone else happen to have an experience like this?

Hi!

I'm a med student, so not at all a professional, but I thought I'd chime in!

Your lump sounds like a very typical sebaceous cyst, a harmless and common type of lump that is usually painless (like yours). They are often prone to show up after continuous pressure or irritation of glands near your hairline (such as from your wig, or the bathtub). They can last for a very long time sometimes, especially if the irritation continues, but are not dangerous at all. You're mentioning that you've had your bathtub/wig habits for ages, but that doesn't really matter - it's like, sometimes you get a pimple on your face, sometimes not, the body is a bit random.

On the other hand - T cell lymphomas are quite rare, and lymphomas of any kind don't present at the back of the neck near the hairline (or very rarely). In general, they wouldn't shrink or change their appearence in the way yours seems to do either.

So we have the quite common harmless sebaceous cyst that fits your description very well, and then we have the very rare t cell lymphoma which doesn't fit your description at all.

I understand the fear of lymphoma has been a bit triggered by your father's diagnosis. I'm not sure if you're referring to the heredity factor here, but heredity isn't that big a factor in lymphomas, and I'm fairly sure follicular cancer doesn't really correlate to t cell lymphoma genetically, since it's not the same type of cells involved.

I could easily bet a thousand bucks this is NOT a T cell lymphoma. Because it absolutely isn't. That said, I know health anxiety doesn't always work that way - I've also spent a lot of time worrying sick about neck lumps. I hope you can find the strength to not give in to it, and to keep working with your CBT. <3

You have no idea how much this means to me. You’re an angel! I’m crying with relief. What you’ve offered me here is precious. Thank you thank you thank you!!!!!